Guilt Trip
My grandmother just called some time ago asking me,
"Why don't you come to visit me more often?" as if she had been dumped off into some retirement home and no one cared to come see her for a long time. I told her,
"I just saw you yesterday." She replied,
"No, you didn't." I was mistaken it was the day before yesterday. I corrected myself,
"Day before yesterday." She then said something that I don't quite remember but she sounded really upset and just hung up. Before that and somewhere between the "Why don't you come to visit...?" She asked me what I had done today and I told her laundry and watched movies. I think it was before the visit question.
I know I shouldn't feel bad. She chose to come down here and live alone but I feel so guilty anyway. I had spent most of the the day before yesterday with her and other days the week before and the like. It's not like I haven't visited or just haven't talked to her on the phone or what have you. I mean really she talked as if I had put her someplace to die alone and just didn't care.
Dad told me to not worry about it and if she keeps bugging me like that to tell him because then he'll tell Christina to come down and visit grandma. He told me she isn't my responsibility, she's a big girl and made this choice, if she doesn't like it she can go back home and have Christina take care of her. He was nice about it to me too.
I know I shouldn't feel bad, I know why I shouldn't feel bad. But I do and I don't know why.
"Why don't you come to visit me more often?" as if she had been dumped off into some retirement home and no one cared to come see her for a long time. I told her,
"I just saw you yesterday." She replied,
"No, you didn't." I was mistaken it was the day before yesterday. I corrected myself,
"Day before yesterday." She then said something that I don't quite remember but she sounded really upset and just hung up. Before that and somewhere between the "Why don't you come to visit...?" She asked me what I had done today and I told her laundry and watched movies. I think it was before the visit question.
I know I shouldn't feel bad. She chose to come down here and live alone but I feel so guilty anyway. I had spent most of the the day before yesterday with her and other days the week before and the like. It's not like I haven't visited or just haven't talked to her on the phone or what have you. I mean really she talked as if I had put her someplace to die alone and just didn't care.
Dad told me to not worry about it and if she keeps bugging me like that to tell him because then he'll tell Christina to come down and visit grandma. He told me she isn't my responsibility, she's a big girl and made this choice, if she doesn't like it she can go back home and have Christina take care of her. He was nice about it to me too.
I know I shouldn't feel bad, I know why I shouldn't feel bad. But I do and I don't know why.