Don't Go
Title: Don’t Go
Pairing: Haehyuk
Length: One-shot
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Angst
Summary: Sometimes first kisses shouldn’t happen
It’s late; any reasonable person would be tucked in bed by now. But Eunhyuk and Donghae are sitting on the couch as they continue to talk, it’s been hours but neither wanted to move.
Eunhyuk runs his hand though the younger mans hair and Donghae bites his bottom lip, letting his eyes fall to his lap. Eunhyuk can see the look in Donghae’s eyes, the look that he gets before he says he needs to leave.
Eunhyuk moves his hand from Donghae’s hair to his chin and lightly lifts it up so Donghae is facing him.
Donghae takes a deep breath and opens his mouth to speak but gets cut off by Eunhyuk
“Don’t go” he whispers and it sends a shiver down Donghae’s spine.
Donghae bits his lip for a second time and Eunhyuk can see the battle going on in his head through his eyes. Donghae’s eyes always gave away his emotions.
“I…” Donghae starts to say but stops when Eunhyuk puts his hand on his cheek, his thumb brushing across Donghae’s bottom lip slowly. Donghae closes his eyes as a shiver of pleasure runs through his body.
“Don’t go” he says again but this time it sounds like a plea
“But…” Donghae says, his unfinished complaint falls on deaf ears.
“I know” Eunhyuk says and removes his hand from Donghae’s face.
Donghae takes a deep breath before he stands up and makes a move to grab his jacket
“Stay” Eunhyuk says from the couch
Donghae stops reaching for his jacket and turns to Eunhyuk
“I don’t think that’s such a good idea” he says and in the back of his mind Eunhyuk knows it’s true.
When Eunhyuk doesn’t respond Donghae picks up his coat and starts to head to the door
“Don’t go” Eunhyuk says standing up from the couch and walks over to Donghae “I need you”
Donghae’s hand is frozen on the doorknob, one twist and he could leave. It would be the logical thing to do, the smartest thing.
He should have left but the way Eunhyuk wraps his arms around his shoulders and pulls him into a back hug has Donghae’s mind fogged.
“Stay with me” Eunhyuk whispers into Donghae’s ear and Donghae shuts his eyes as the tingling starts.
They don’t move as Eunhyuk waits for Donghae’s answer. But Donghae can’t answer when Eunhyuk is holding him like that, or the way Eunhyuk’s breath is tickling his ear.
“Stay” Eunhyuk says again and this time Donghae can’t find a reason to protest. So he nods his head and Eunhyuk turns Donghae around so they are face to face.
Donghae wants to kiss him, every fiber of his being wants to kiss him but he pulls away instead; Eunhyuk watches as the younger man puts his coat back down and leans against the wall looking down at the floor.
Eunhyuk knows he should have let the younger leave, knows that he shouldn’t have asked him to stay but for once he wanted to be the one who asked the other to stay. Just once he wanted to be the irresponsible one.
Donghae can’t bring himself to look up because he knows if he looks into Eunhyuk’s eyes he won’t be able to resist. He knows this is wrong, he knows he shouldn’t be here but Eunhyuk’s usually the one to stop things before they go too far and Donghae doesn’t think he has the will power.
Eunhyuk walks up to Donghae’s frozen body; he places his hands on the younger’s cheeks and feels him shiver under the touch. For a second he thinks he should pull away, thinks maybe there is a reason he’s the responsible one but he pushes those thoughts aside. Maybe it was wrong, but maybe it wasn’t supposed to be right.
He forces Donghae to look up at him. He can see the fear and the hesitation in his eyes but there is also want and desire hidden in the chocolate orbs. Eunhyuk tries to turn off his brain, tries to ignore how his mind is screaming at him to stop.
He leans in and observes the way Donghae closes his eyes out of fear and anticipation. He stops when their noses touch, when they are breathing in each other’s breath and he closes his eyes too.
He breathes in Donghae’s scent before he closes the gap between them and kisses Donghae on the lips. The kiss feels more innocent than it has any right to. Donghae’s lips fit perfectly on Eunhyuk’s, like two connecting puzzle pieces and Eunhyuk regrets never letting the younger kiss him when he wanted to.
Donghae wonders if first kisses are suppose to feel so wrong and at the same time so right. When Eunhyuk pulls away he wants to recapture the older man’s lips but he doesn’t, if fact he doesn’t do anything. He doesn’t open his eyes, he doesn’t move, he doesn’t breathe and Eunhyuk thinks maybe it was a mistake, maybe he shouldn’t have been so bold.
Donghae’s heart is beating too fast yet at the same time its breaking. He knows they can’t go on like this, they are too young and he is too naive for things to really work out between them. If this were to continue it would be him who ruined it, he just knows it and even if Eunhyuk doesn’t say it he knows it too. Donghae IS destructions; he is all jealousy, violence and jumping to conclusions and they both know their romance would die before it ever had the chance to ignite.
Donghae wouldn’t be able to live with himself if it was him who ruined their friendship and so he did the only thing he could think of to save themselves from the hurt, he opened his eyes and spoke
“I should go” he said gently pushing Eunhyuk off of him.
Eunhyuk watched as the younger boy picked up his jacket and headed towards the door.
“Don’t go” Eunhyuk called and Donghae stopped but he didn’t turn around. He stood their unmoving for minutes and Eunhyuk thinks maybe he broke him but at the same time thinks it’s so like Donghae to stand there and not answer his plea.
Eunhyuk can’t stand the silence any longer and so he walks up to Donghae and forces him to turn around. He isn’t shocked when he sees that Donghae is crying, the boy always cries but it breaks his heart none the less.
He gently whips away the younger’s tears and pretends he doesn’t feel the younger flinch away with every touch.
Eunhyuk doesn’t know how to fix the situation and Donghae doesn’t want him to try. Donghae wants to run, to get away from Eunhyuk before it’s too late but he can’t move away from Eunhyuk, not when the older man is finally giving him what he’s always wanted.
Donghae thinks maybe everyone is right when they call him a selfish bastard because even though he knows they won’t last he kisses Eunhyuk anyways.
Eunhyuk is shocked at first but then responds back to Donghae’s kiss but right before the kiss can elevate to something new Donghae pulls away.
“I need to go” he says not even bothering to look into Eunhyuk’s eyes before he runs out the door.
Eunhyuk is frozen from shock and doesn’t move for a good five minutes. He knows he’s an idiot, knows that what they just did they can’t take back but maybe it wasn’t something he would regret, maybe Donghae was worth risking his heart for.
Donghae runs through the streets, runs because he knows he’s a jerk, he should’ve left, he shouldn’t have kissed Eunhyuk but he’s never been one to do the right thing. He thinks maybe he could be better for Eunhyuk but he knows he’ll fail. He wishes they could go back, go back to when he would beg Eunhyuk for attention and kisses that Eunhyuk refused to give. Everything was so much simpler back then and even though he knows he shouldn’t Donghae still wants Eunhyuk’s attention.
Even after everything that’s happened Donghae still wants things to remain the same, he doesn’t want to lose Eunhyuk, especially not to his own stupidity. So he continues to run, to run away from a problem that is entirely his fault.
A/N: okay here is an agsty one-shot that i had to write because i'm in a really ansty mood XD i have a huge project for school that i have to work on this weekend and i'm not sure if i will be able to update Finding You or Beautiful Hangover or Your Best Friend is going to Die! but i promise i will try, and i am pretty good at multi-tasking so maybe i will update :D
Thank you so much for reading <3