Writer's Block: A stroll down memory lane
...This is difficult.
Actually, it shouldn't be this difficult. If I lost all my old memories...there are some memories I depend on when I'm clearly in a bad mood and just sad and feeling bad about life and wanting to shoot puppies. And the thought of not having those memories, not knowing that this or that ever happened is kind of really scary.
And if I have no old memories, I would have to start all over again with people I know. I would have to re-differentiate between my friends and my enemies and those who did bad stuff to me and those who I owe my sanity to. And I've gone through enough (not that much, really. Compared to some people who have been backstabbed and left alone and tricked a gazillion times but still.) It's been enough that I don't trust myself to be able to go through all of that again. Besides I'd forget how much to appreciate certian characters that have sticked with me for a while.
....But then I'm going to have to do that anyways. In a year when I go to college, even if I stay in Maryland just x miles away, I'm going to have to sort through humans and figure out if my roomate is REALLY that nice or if the guy who sits next to me in this class is REALLY that much of an asshole. I hate doing that. Because I'm a)too cynical b) really hard to get used to OH YEAH. That too. The people who tolerate me right now...I feel so ridiculously lucky that I found them. I'm weird. I feel like people who overhear me talking wtih my friends think I'm really strange and weird and
maybe that's why he never called back. But anyways. Where was I?
But it really shouldn't be difficult because I have to start over anyways and even though there are some really lovely old memories, I have a lot of life to live (hopefully) and hopefully, it wont suck and hopefully there will be moments where I'd want to make a memory and remember it.
But like I said. I'm a sucker for nostalgia.