(no subject)
"Oh why can't I be what you need?
A new improved version of me.
But I'm nothing so good, no I'm.. nothing."
--From Autumn to Ashes Lyrics
Dear World,
Guess what I got for mother's day? As expected, nothing! Yup, a big fat pile of SQUAT. No breakfast, no kind words, no kisses. Just a big childish man roaming about my house complaining. He actually said to me the other day "how much do you actually watch the kids"?
WTH! That made me SO sad because I do my very best and we have two happy, healthy, and SMART children. Does he think my prekindergarten-er has taught himself to write and begin to read? Does he think Jasper started talking from the TV? Who does he thinks changes Jasper and feeds him while he's at work?
Okay, a lot of days we stay in jammies all day but GOOD LORD give me a break man. I think he is really trying to push me away. He is doing a great freaking job.
He was complaining about the house being a mess so I moved the computer desk and stuff alone to a better area and cleaned the room. He came in from covering the special Olympics and barely said anything.
I guess he doesn't get that I realize I'm not at top speed. I just don't think he realizes how much it depresses me. I was always the one who took charge and care of the family.
This royally bites and allthough sick, I DID push out those babies, carry them for as long as possible inside of me, and always put them first. I should have at least got a card....am I wrong?
Scumbag.
Love,
Jenna
"I break in two over you.
I break in two and each piece of me dies.
And only you can give the breath of life.
But you don't see me.
You don't."