(no subject)
it's been a while...
my life is completely different since the last time i updated. i moved off the mountain and into a house in north hollywood with adam. i'm financially failing at being an adult. and lack inspiration to form any tangible product out of the creativity coursing through my brain parts. i'm losing my hair.
i was a featured background actor in a movie starring tom hanks and emma watson. i bought a car and then lost said car and bought another car and just payed $1300 that i don't have to fix it. i joined a competitive karaoke league. i work at kohl's again in the shoe department. i still see my mountain friends frequently. i love wearing sweaters and have started drinking more tea. coffee still makes up for all of the water that i don't drink. i still eat fairly healthy. but i haven't worked out in a year. rock climbing hasn't been a thing either. i just applied to go back to college. i'm trying my best to figure it out.
i just browsed this thing for the past hour. it reminded me of who i was and where i've been and all the dreams i had of making it here. and now here i am. and i still have no clue what i want and know exactly what i want all at the same time. and i'm slowly coming to realize that no one ever really makes it. and despite appearances, everyone is just as financially fucked as i am, and really, even more so. life still has its beautiful moments. i stopped appreciating them. i need to start.
i think i may be back for a while. just until i sort every out again. just so i can remember these lessons so the things i learn are here for when i forget them.
love always,
matthew