Im confessing like a child

[xlosingforeverx]

Every move made was watched ever so
closely by both parties. Meaningless.
It was just fun to watch you laugh and
stare back. I swallowed much harder.
I don't mind it so much anymore.
IT
means/meant
nothing
One day Ill drink this away
ill drink it all away.
the repercussions of you
are more than I can stand.
Bottle in hand I cheers to the death of you.
to the death of we.

I could use a warm body
and a few days of sobriety.
you only return when I don't remember.
life is funny.

I watched the smoke sink into my skin
I wont remember this in the morning.
that's the joy of what I'm about to do.
I kill another one just so I can forget
about the tear that slipped out.
I'm spinning into control.
and gaining lack of sleep.
All I can hear is the waterfall
that never dries up as long
as I feed it regularly. and its
rare that i'm sleeping alone.
Stumbling into the open stall
to clear my head. I'm never alone.
Cheers. Were closing out the bar tonight.
Ambitious about everything.
Committed to nothing.