Hymns of hate in memorandum...
i dont belong here anymore. i dont belong anywhere come to think of it.
i drink too much to curb my depression. i smoke to forget about it. but it always returns stronger. i just wish i had someone to tell me that its okay and someone to be there for me and not leave me when things got rough. i just need a true friend you know.
everyone i have loved has left me at some point of my life. people i trusted. this last one really caught me off guard. im trying so hard to live. but this isnt living what i am doing. people tell me to get over it and deal and that its life, if everyone felt the same way i did then we as humans would never be able to function and have order in life. wed all be insane and the world would be upside down. i am not normal. it just depends on if you want to be the one to pull me up when i am down.
i just want someone who would never abandon me at these times.
its like when i was falling down he faked me out and snatched his hand away.
he did it for his own selfish reasons. hes not ridden with guilt at my scars or my bruises or my tears. he resents them. he resents everything i do but he'll still say he loves me.
im a toy. a sad puppet of a girl. he just likes the sight of my face but when i scratch it up and i fade he throws me away.
i drink too much to curb my depression. i smoke to forget about it. but it always returns stronger. i just wish i had someone to tell me that its okay and someone to be there for me and not leave me when things got rough. i just need a true friend you know.
everyone i have loved has left me at some point of my life. people i trusted. this last one really caught me off guard. im trying so hard to live. but this isnt living what i am doing. people tell me to get over it and deal and that its life, if everyone felt the same way i did then we as humans would never be able to function and have order in life. wed all be insane and the world would be upside down. i am not normal. it just depends on if you want to be the one to pull me up when i am down.
i just want someone who would never abandon me at these times.
its like when i was falling down he faked me out and snatched his hand away.
he did it for his own selfish reasons. hes not ridden with guilt at my scars or my bruises or my tears. he resents them. he resents everything i do but he'll still say he loves me.
im a toy. a sad puppet of a girl. he just likes the sight of my face but when i scratch it up and i fade he throws me away.