Last few chapters of Natural History
Title: Natural History
Fandom: DC
Characters/Pairing: Boostle (eventually), the Carter family
Rating: Probably PG-13 overall
Summary: Wacky AU times! Jonar Carter is an international terrorist. The government sends the remaining Carters to the twentieth century for their own protection-1983, to be exact. Rather than risk Gotham City in the early days of Batman, the Carter family ends up in Ted’s Chicagoland hometown, where fifteen-year-old Mike and Shel can attend high school in (relative) peace.
Author’s Note: Dates and such may be a little off because I can't write this sort of fic using a canon timeline. If you want to know how old everybody is and all that, I can provide a handy chart.
The next few days were a blur of duct tape and Oreos. Mike slept over in Ted’s garage, catching a few hours of rest in a sleeping bag while Ted stayed up even later. In the end, Mike found him passed out inside the foot of the giant exoskeleton at 4:30 in the morning on October 30th. He carefully picked him up and carried him to his sleeping bag, zipping him in just so. It was, he considered, probably the high point of the project, and he was extremely glad he’d had to go to the bathroom.
By Halloween, the exoskeleton was complete. Ted knew a guy who’d let them use his pickup truck, provided neither of them actually drove it. Skeets, after months of being cooped up all day with no internet and barely any radio, was all too eager to participate in their schemes. The route was all planned out, and Shel had been bribed into covering for them while they snuck off to set everything up. They were free to enjoy trick-or-treating like ordinary kids without a giant exoskeleton in their garage.
Ted showed up at Mike’s house at 4:00 sharp with a specially designed, scarab-shaped trick-or-treating bag. Apparently he’d sewn it up in the three or four hours since they’d finished the exoskeleton-Mike didn’t want to question it too closely. They set off, earning an eye-roll from Shel and a sort of wink from Skeets (which was actually fairly disconcerting. Mike made a note to find some books for the poor thing). In a short while, they had garnered quite a bit of sweets. By the time they reached Ted’s house, their bags were actually bulging. They hid their candy, called the pickup truck guy, and left for Sarah’s, where Shel was waiting with Skeets tucked discreetly into a pillowcase.
“Hey guys,” said Mike breathlessly. “Who’re we waiting for?”
“No one,” Shel said, handing him the bag. “You guys were the last.”
“Cool, then let’s go,” Ted smiled.
Wendy and Emily exchanged glances.
“What?” asked Mike. “What’d we do?”
“You didn’t do anything, really,” said Emily. “It’s just that you’re wearing chainmail, Ted.”
“What’s wrong with chainmail?” Ted asked angrily.
“Nothing, Ted, calm down,” said Wendy. “But, I mean,” she laughed. “Where do you even get chainmail?”
“I made it,” sniffed Ted.
“You made chainmail?” asked Dave, incredulously. “What are you, a blacksmith?”
“Please,” Ted scoffed. “I’m an engineer.”
“What does that-” Dave began, but Ted interrupted.
“Oh, Dave,” he shook his head. “Robots don’t build themselves, you know.” He paused, considering. “Not even the ones that build other robots. Somewhere along the line, somebody’s got to make them,” he said, switching into lecture mode. “Now, you might think engineers just hand the designs off to someone else, but you have to do a serious amount of constructing yourself if you want to be any good, especially in robotics. I mean, I don’t usually make armor or anything, but I know my way around a piece of metal.”
“He has a whole workshop in his garage,” added Mike.
“Thanks for the lecture, Professor Kord,” Jeff grinned. “C’mon, you guys, let’s go trick-or-treating.”
They lasted about half an hour before taking off, feigning stomachaches. Shel made a point of lecturing them and sending them home, taking care to mutter something in Mike’s ear that sounded a whole lot like “half your take.” They waited around the corner until they could no longer hear the group, and then hurried over to Ted’s, where Pickup Truck Guy was waiting for them. With his help, they loaded the truck, using bungee cords to secure the exoskeleton in place. As soon as that was done, they grabbed some candy and jumped in the car.
Ted was practically bursting with excitement the whole way there.
“This is gonna be so great, Mike,” he said, nearly bouncing in his seat. “The look on their faces…”
“I know,” agreed Mike. “The robot came out really good, too.”
“We’re here,” announced Pickup Truck Guy.
“Cool,” said Ted. “Thanks, Vic.”
“No problem,” Pickup Truck Guy-Vic-smiled.
“I mean it,” insisted Ted. “You didn’t have to come all the way from the city.”
“Hey, I owe you one for that chemistry class,” said Vic.
“College courses,” Ted told Mike, like that explained everything. “I took one, and Vic was my lab partner. Now let’s go set this thing up!”
Vic helped them get the exoskeleton up and standing, using stakes and bungee cords to keep it upright. Then he left, after they said their goodbyes, leaving Ted and Mike alone with their candy in a giant robot foot. It was a little cramped in there, but Mike wasn’t complaining.
“I can’t believe we did this,” he said in amazement.
“Yeah,” said Ted. “I know.”
“No, I mean…” he grasped for the right word. “It’s like, a cathedral, you know? One of those big old gothic cathedrals that was built back in the Middle Ages.”
“Well, that’s certainly flattering, Mike, but I hardly think-”
“Not like that, Ted. I mean, that we built it,” Said Mike.
Ted frowned. “I don’t follow.”
“Okay, it’s like, here they are, with no equipment, right?” Ted nodded. “No fancy engineering tricks. If they’d’ve tried to be architects today, they never would’ve made it out of college. But even so, they made these huge, beautiful buildings that have lasted, like, 400 years.”
“400 years ago was the Renaissance, Mike. Those cathedrals were built-”
“That’s not the point, Ted,” he rolled his eyes. “The point is they made something really, really good without a lot of technology, and we still think they’re good all these years later. I’m from the future, Ted,” he smiled. “And I still think this is good.”
Ted was silent for a moment.
“You know, I think that’s one of the nicest things anyone’s ever said to me,” he swallowed, hesitating, before he continued. “Listen, Mike, I-”
Mike’s mouth went dry. He leaned forward.
Then the special, extra-robotic voice of Skeets sent them reeling nearly out of their skins.
“Exterminate! Exterminate! Resistance is futile!”
They looked at each other and grinned before jumping out to surprise their friends.
Oh well. Whatever it was, they could talk about it later.
But they didn't get to talk about it, as Ted fell asleep immediately after the party and kept on sleeping until well after Mike's mom called the next morning, demanding that he come home at once. At school the next day he learned two things: the football team made the championships, and Jeremy Jackson broke his ankle. More importantly, he learned that he was to replace Jeremy on varsity.
"Why me? he asked when he found out. "Why not Jeff? I mean, he's starting quarterback."
"Isn't it obvious?" Ted grinned. "You're the best. The only reason Jeff is starting is because he started last year, and they need you to close the game. Right?"
"Yeah, I guess," said Mike, unconvinced.
And so he began practicing with varsity every day after school, even staying for extra help once the rest of the team had gone home. On weekends, he watched old games and wrote new plays. Whenever he tried to call Ted, Ted was at gymnastics. It turned out that he had a competition coming up. He explained this to Mike at lunch, which was rapidly becoming the only time they could talk to each other without getting interrupted by an angry teacher. It was the second half of the semester, and they were really starting to pile on the homework. It wasn't until Thanksgiving break that they had any free time to speak of.
"I am exhausted," said Ted, flopping down on the couch next to Mike.
"Yeah," Mike sighed. "Feels like I haven't slept in a month."
"Have you?" asked Ted. "'Cause I haven't."
Mike laughed. Ted was here, in his basement, for the first time in ages. It felt like he'd found something he'd been missing for a while.
"Tommorrow's Thanksgiving," said Ted. "Do they celebrate Thanksgiving in the future?"
"Yeah," said Mike. "But it's probably really different here."
"Hey, why don't you come to my house for dinner?" Ted's voice was strange. "You know, to test things." He blushed. "You should probably bring your family, though."
More than a minute passed before Mike could possibly think of something to say.
"Yeah," he managed. "That's really nice of you to offer."
"Yeah," murmured Ted, his voice low.
"Ted--?" Mike tentatively reached out a hand to touch his hair.
"Mike," Ted breathed, and suddenly he was on him.
Mike couldn't help but wrap his arms around Ted's waist and press their lips together.
"God, Ted," he groaned.
"Knew it," gasped Ted. "Knew you wanted this."
"Wanted you, Ted," said Mike. "Wanted you."
Ted shut him up with a kiss.
"Wanted you, Ted," he panted when they broke apart. "Always wanted you. Wanted to kiss you, touch you, since the day we met. Ted--" he stopped, gasping as Ted licked at his throat.
"Good," growled Ted. He ground their hips together. "Wanted you too. Wanted this so bad--" Mike slipped a hand up his shirt. "Didn't know," he whispered plaintively. "Didn't know how to tell you."
"Could've just--could've just told me," groaned Mike.
"Should've," said Ted.
And then the only sounds were the sounds of them breathing, and the throaty little noises Ted kept making. Mike moaned and crushed Ted toward him, trying desperately to get them as close as possible. Ted wriggled appreciatively and caught Mike's lower lip between his teeth, worrying it gently. One of Mike's hands wound its way into Ted's hair, while the other reached down to push a thumb past Ted's waistband. Both of Ted's legs were around Mike's waist, and he was clinging to Mike for dear life, kissing him with the same intensity he he put in all his projects. Mike was close, impossibly close, and he came keening wordlessly into Ted's mouth. Ted followed soon after, burying his muffled cry against Mike's shoulder.
"That was...intense," Mike said as soon as he came back to himself.
"Yeah," mumbled Ted, his face still tucked into the crook of Mike's neck.
"I..." Mike hesitated. "I thought, I mean, I was worried--you're not interested in Shel, are you?"
Ted lifted his face from Mike's shoulder long enough to give him a reassuring smile.
"Was," he said. "Like you more."
"Good," said Mike, relieved. "'Cause I really like you. Um. A lot."
"Me too," Mike could feel him smiling against his neck. "'Sides, I couldn't date Shel," said Ted. "She's way too tall for me."
Mike frowned. "I thought that was Shel's weird thing."
"Not weird," said Ted. "Old-fashioned."
"Oh?"
"Yeah," he snuggled closer to Mike. "Quaint."
"Like your robots?" Mike smirked.
"Hey," Ted gave him a weak shove. "My robots are not quaint."
"Yeah?" said Mike. "You want me to get Skeets down here?"
"You wouldn't want im to see you like this," Ted said confidently. "Hey, do you have any extra pants, by the way?"
"Might be a little long," Ted glared at him. "But yeah."
Ted slumped back down with a little hum of contentment, and Mike leaned back and closed his eyes.
The next day, Mike and his family celebrated their first Thanksgiving without his dad, without the constant pressure of his demands, and it was their first Thanksgiving where they didn't have to worry about money or debt. It was the first Thanksgiving Mike celebrated with Ted by his side, and it certainly wouldn't be the last. He wasn't sure if he was ever going to go back to the 25th century, but he was pretty sure he didn't want to go at all. He liked the 20th century; for all its warfare and pollution, it was strangely comfortable, and he knew it was only going to get better from here. In 20 years he'd have high-speed internet, and, hopefully, he'd still have Ted.
It was going to be awesome.
They came home on the same day they left--it was one of the perks of traveling with a Time Master. After a shower and a good night's sleep, they all met up at Ted's house in Highland Park.
"You guys got a house in the suburbs?" said Shel. "Getting a kid or something?"
"Yeah," Mike smirked. "You're gonna be our surrogate," Ted spit out his beer. "Yeah, Ted would definitely sleep with you."
"Mike!" Ted squeaked. "I would not!" Mike and Shel both raised an eyebrow. "Okay, maybe I would," he admitted. "But it'd be awkward."
"We're not getting a kid," Mike rolled his eyes. "Ted just really likes Lake County."
"It's a nice house, okay?" Ted snapped. "Not everyone has to live in the city, you know."
"No, Ted," said Mike, kissing his cheek. "Just the cool people."
"You live here too," grumbled Ted, but he leaned into the kiss. "So, Shel, you're not still going back, are you? Back to the future," he chuckled. "Heh."
"Nah," she smiled. "Guess it grew on me."
"You mean--" his breath hitched as Mike rubbed slow circles in his neck. "We invented the internet."
She laughed. "Pretty much, yeah."
"Shel wanted to go to the 21st century in the first place," said Mike.
"I'm glad you guys got here when you did," Ted squeezed Mike's hand.
Mike shook his head. "What would you have done without us?"
"I don't know, but I'd probably have figured out that everyone else was, you know, not human!"
"I still can't believe that," said Mike. "I mean, what are the odds?"
"Would you like me to calculate them for you, sir?" asked Skeets.
"That's okay, Skeets," Mike shrugged. "I don't really care that much."
"Of course, sir," Skeets made a little sighing noise. "That was a joke."
"Course it was," said Mike, ruffling Ted's hair. "Just playing along, Skeets."
"So, yeah," Shel cleared her throat. "I'm gonna go, unless you want to make any more inappropriate suggestions, Mike."
"Nah," Mike smiled. "We did it, didn't we?" he got a faraway look in his eye. "We saved the multiverse."
"Yeah," she said. "We did."
"Bye, Shel," Ted waved.
"Bye guys," she said, walking out the door. "Try and call me this time, okay?"
They assured her they would, and, satisfied, she left. Ted took the opportunity to pull Mike in for a bruising kiss and Skeets floated discreetly to the kitchen.
Mmm, I love you," whispered Mike.
"I know," said Ted, and kissed him again. "I love you too."
And they all lived happily ever.
Fandom: DC
Characters/Pairing: Boostle (eventually), the Carter family
Rating: Probably PG-13 overall
Summary: Wacky AU times! Jonar Carter is an international terrorist. The government sends the remaining Carters to the twentieth century for their own protection-1983, to be exact. Rather than risk Gotham City in the early days of Batman, the Carter family ends up in Ted’s Chicagoland hometown, where fifteen-year-old Mike and Shel can attend high school in (relative) peace.
Author’s Note: Dates and such may be a little off because I can't write this sort of fic using a canon timeline. If you want to know how old everybody is and all that, I can provide a handy chart.
The next few days were a blur of duct tape and Oreos. Mike slept over in Ted’s garage, catching a few hours of rest in a sleeping bag while Ted stayed up even later. In the end, Mike found him passed out inside the foot of the giant exoskeleton at 4:30 in the morning on October 30th. He carefully picked him up and carried him to his sleeping bag, zipping him in just so. It was, he considered, probably the high point of the project, and he was extremely glad he’d had to go to the bathroom.
By Halloween, the exoskeleton was complete. Ted knew a guy who’d let them use his pickup truck, provided neither of them actually drove it. Skeets, after months of being cooped up all day with no internet and barely any radio, was all too eager to participate in their schemes. The route was all planned out, and Shel had been bribed into covering for them while they snuck off to set everything up. They were free to enjoy trick-or-treating like ordinary kids without a giant exoskeleton in their garage.
Ted showed up at Mike’s house at 4:00 sharp with a specially designed, scarab-shaped trick-or-treating bag. Apparently he’d sewn it up in the three or four hours since they’d finished the exoskeleton-Mike didn’t want to question it too closely. They set off, earning an eye-roll from Shel and a sort of wink from Skeets (which was actually fairly disconcerting. Mike made a note to find some books for the poor thing). In a short while, they had garnered quite a bit of sweets. By the time they reached Ted’s house, their bags were actually bulging. They hid their candy, called the pickup truck guy, and left for Sarah’s, where Shel was waiting with Skeets tucked discreetly into a pillowcase.
“Hey guys,” said Mike breathlessly. “Who’re we waiting for?”
“No one,” Shel said, handing him the bag. “You guys were the last.”
“Cool, then let’s go,” Ted smiled.
Wendy and Emily exchanged glances.
“What?” asked Mike. “What’d we do?”
“You didn’t do anything, really,” said Emily. “It’s just that you’re wearing chainmail, Ted.”
“What’s wrong with chainmail?” Ted asked angrily.
“Nothing, Ted, calm down,” said Wendy. “But, I mean,” she laughed. “Where do you even get chainmail?”
“I made it,” sniffed Ted.
“You made chainmail?” asked Dave, incredulously. “What are you, a blacksmith?”
“Please,” Ted scoffed. “I’m an engineer.”
“What does that-” Dave began, but Ted interrupted.
“Oh, Dave,” he shook his head. “Robots don’t build themselves, you know.” He paused, considering. “Not even the ones that build other robots. Somewhere along the line, somebody’s got to make them,” he said, switching into lecture mode. “Now, you might think engineers just hand the designs off to someone else, but you have to do a serious amount of constructing yourself if you want to be any good, especially in robotics. I mean, I don’t usually make armor or anything, but I know my way around a piece of metal.”
“He has a whole workshop in his garage,” added Mike.
“Thanks for the lecture, Professor Kord,” Jeff grinned. “C’mon, you guys, let’s go trick-or-treating.”
They lasted about half an hour before taking off, feigning stomachaches. Shel made a point of lecturing them and sending them home, taking care to mutter something in Mike’s ear that sounded a whole lot like “half your take.” They waited around the corner until they could no longer hear the group, and then hurried over to Ted’s, where Pickup Truck Guy was waiting for them. With his help, they loaded the truck, using bungee cords to secure the exoskeleton in place. As soon as that was done, they grabbed some candy and jumped in the car.
Ted was practically bursting with excitement the whole way there.
“This is gonna be so great, Mike,” he said, nearly bouncing in his seat. “The look on their faces…”
“I know,” agreed Mike. “The robot came out really good, too.”
“We’re here,” announced Pickup Truck Guy.
“Cool,” said Ted. “Thanks, Vic.”
“No problem,” Pickup Truck Guy-Vic-smiled.
“I mean it,” insisted Ted. “You didn’t have to come all the way from the city.”
“Hey, I owe you one for that chemistry class,” said Vic.
“College courses,” Ted told Mike, like that explained everything. “I took one, and Vic was my lab partner. Now let’s go set this thing up!”
Vic helped them get the exoskeleton up and standing, using stakes and bungee cords to keep it upright. Then he left, after they said their goodbyes, leaving Ted and Mike alone with their candy in a giant robot foot. It was a little cramped in there, but Mike wasn’t complaining.
“I can’t believe we did this,” he said in amazement.
“Yeah,” said Ted. “I know.”
“No, I mean…” he grasped for the right word. “It’s like, a cathedral, you know? One of those big old gothic cathedrals that was built back in the Middle Ages.”
“Well, that’s certainly flattering, Mike, but I hardly think-”
“Not like that, Ted. I mean, that we built it,” Said Mike.
Ted frowned. “I don’t follow.”
“Okay, it’s like, here they are, with no equipment, right?” Ted nodded. “No fancy engineering tricks. If they’d’ve tried to be architects today, they never would’ve made it out of college. But even so, they made these huge, beautiful buildings that have lasted, like, 400 years.”
“400 years ago was the Renaissance, Mike. Those cathedrals were built-”
“That’s not the point, Ted,” he rolled his eyes. “The point is they made something really, really good without a lot of technology, and we still think they’re good all these years later. I’m from the future, Ted,” he smiled. “And I still think this is good.”
Ted was silent for a moment.
“You know, I think that’s one of the nicest things anyone’s ever said to me,” he swallowed, hesitating, before he continued. “Listen, Mike, I-”
Mike’s mouth went dry. He leaned forward.
Then the special, extra-robotic voice of Skeets sent them reeling nearly out of their skins.
“Exterminate! Exterminate! Resistance is futile!”
They looked at each other and grinned before jumping out to surprise their friends.
Oh well. Whatever it was, they could talk about it later.
But they didn't get to talk about it, as Ted fell asleep immediately after the party and kept on sleeping until well after Mike's mom called the next morning, demanding that he come home at once. At school the next day he learned two things: the football team made the championships, and Jeremy Jackson broke his ankle. More importantly, he learned that he was to replace Jeremy on varsity.
"Why me? he asked when he found out. "Why not Jeff? I mean, he's starting quarterback."
"Isn't it obvious?" Ted grinned. "You're the best. The only reason Jeff is starting is because he started last year, and they need you to close the game. Right?"
"Yeah, I guess," said Mike, unconvinced.
And so he began practicing with varsity every day after school, even staying for extra help once the rest of the team had gone home. On weekends, he watched old games and wrote new plays. Whenever he tried to call Ted, Ted was at gymnastics. It turned out that he had a competition coming up. He explained this to Mike at lunch, which was rapidly becoming the only time they could talk to each other without getting interrupted by an angry teacher. It was the second half of the semester, and they were really starting to pile on the homework. It wasn't until Thanksgiving break that they had any free time to speak of.
"I am exhausted," said Ted, flopping down on the couch next to Mike.
"Yeah," Mike sighed. "Feels like I haven't slept in a month."
"Have you?" asked Ted. "'Cause I haven't."
Mike laughed. Ted was here, in his basement, for the first time in ages. It felt like he'd found something he'd been missing for a while.
"Tommorrow's Thanksgiving," said Ted. "Do they celebrate Thanksgiving in the future?"
"Yeah," said Mike. "But it's probably really different here."
"Hey, why don't you come to my house for dinner?" Ted's voice was strange. "You know, to test things." He blushed. "You should probably bring your family, though."
More than a minute passed before Mike could possibly think of something to say.
"Yeah," he managed. "That's really nice of you to offer."
"Yeah," murmured Ted, his voice low.
"Ted--?" Mike tentatively reached out a hand to touch his hair.
"Mike," Ted breathed, and suddenly he was on him.
Mike couldn't help but wrap his arms around Ted's waist and press their lips together.
"God, Ted," he groaned.
"Knew it," gasped Ted. "Knew you wanted this."
"Wanted you, Ted," said Mike. "Wanted you."
Ted shut him up with a kiss.
"Wanted you, Ted," he panted when they broke apart. "Always wanted you. Wanted to kiss you, touch you, since the day we met. Ted--" he stopped, gasping as Ted licked at his throat.
"Good," growled Ted. He ground their hips together. "Wanted you too. Wanted this so bad--" Mike slipped a hand up his shirt. "Didn't know," he whispered plaintively. "Didn't know how to tell you."
"Could've just--could've just told me," groaned Mike.
"Should've," said Ted.
And then the only sounds were the sounds of them breathing, and the throaty little noises Ted kept making. Mike moaned and crushed Ted toward him, trying desperately to get them as close as possible. Ted wriggled appreciatively and caught Mike's lower lip between his teeth, worrying it gently. One of Mike's hands wound its way into Ted's hair, while the other reached down to push a thumb past Ted's waistband. Both of Ted's legs were around Mike's waist, and he was clinging to Mike for dear life, kissing him with the same intensity he he put in all his projects. Mike was close, impossibly close, and he came keening wordlessly into Ted's mouth. Ted followed soon after, burying his muffled cry against Mike's shoulder.
"That was...intense," Mike said as soon as he came back to himself.
"Yeah," mumbled Ted, his face still tucked into the crook of Mike's neck.
"I..." Mike hesitated. "I thought, I mean, I was worried--you're not interested in Shel, are you?"
Ted lifted his face from Mike's shoulder long enough to give him a reassuring smile.
"Was," he said. "Like you more."
"Good," said Mike, relieved. "'Cause I really like you. Um. A lot."
"Me too," Mike could feel him smiling against his neck. "'Sides, I couldn't date Shel," said Ted. "She's way too tall for me."
Mike frowned. "I thought that was Shel's weird thing."
"Not weird," said Ted. "Old-fashioned."
"Oh?"
"Yeah," he snuggled closer to Mike. "Quaint."
"Like your robots?" Mike smirked.
"Hey," Ted gave him a weak shove. "My robots are not quaint."
"Yeah?" said Mike. "You want me to get Skeets down here?"
"You wouldn't want im to see you like this," Ted said confidently. "Hey, do you have any extra pants, by the way?"
"Might be a little long," Ted glared at him. "But yeah."
Ted slumped back down with a little hum of contentment, and Mike leaned back and closed his eyes.
The next day, Mike and his family celebrated their first Thanksgiving without his dad, without the constant pressure of his demands, and it was their first Thanksgiving where they didn't have to worry about money or debt. It was the first Thanksgiving Mike celebrated with Ted by his side, and it certainly wouldn't be the last. He wasn't sure if he was ever going to go back to the 25th century, but he was pretty sure he didn't want to go at all. He liked the 20th century; for all its warfare and pollution, it was strangely comfortable, and he knew it was only going to get better from here. In 20 years he'd have high-speed internet, and, hopefully, he'd still have Ted.
It was going to be awesome.
They came home on the same day they left--it was one of the perks of traveling with a Time Master. After a shower and a good night's sleep, they all met up at Ted's house in Highland Park.
"You guys got a house in the suburbs?" said Shel. "Getting a kid or something?"
"Yeah," Mike smirked. "You're gonna be our surrogate," Ted spit out his beer. "Yeah, Ted would definitely sleep with you."
"Mike!" Ted squeaked. "I would not!" Mike and Shel both raised an eyebrow. "Okay, maybe I would," he admitted. "But it'd be awkward."
"We're not getting a kid," Mike rolled his eyes. "Ted just really likes Lake County."
"It's a nice house, okay?" Ted snapped. "Not everyone has to live in the city, you know."
"No, Ted," said Mike, kissing his cheek. "Just the cool people."
"You live here too," grumbled Ted, but he leaned into the kiss. "So, Shel, you're not still going back, are you? Back to the future," he chuckled. "Heh."
"Nah," she smiled. "Guess it grew on me."
"You mean--" his breath hitched as Mike rubbed slow circles in his neck. "We invented the internet."
She laughed. "Pretty much, yeah."
"Shel wanted to go to the 21st century in the first place," said Mike.
"I'm glad you guys got here when you did," Ted squeezed Mike's hand.
Mike shook his head. "What would you have done without us?"
"I don't know, but I'd probably have figured out that everyone else was, you know, not human!"
"I still can't believe that," said Mike. "I mean, what are the odds?"
"Would you like me to calculate them for you, sir?" asked Skeets.
"That's okay, Skeets," Mike shrugged. "I don't really care that much."
"Of course, sir," Skeets made a little sighing noise. "That was a joke."
"Course it was," said Mike, ruffling Ted's hair. "Just playing along, Skeets."
"So, yeah," Shel cleared her throat. "I'm gonna go, unless you want to make any more inappropriate suggestions, Mike."
"Nah," Mike smiled. "We did it, didn't we?" he got a faraway look in his eye. "We saved the multiverse."
"Yeah," she said. "We did."
"Bye, Shel," Ted waved.
"Bye guys," she said, walking out the door. "Try and call me this time, okay?"
They assured her they would, and, satisfied, she left. Ted took the opportunity to pull Mike in for a bruising kiss and Skeets floated discreetly to the kitchen.
Mmm, I love you," whispered Mike.
"I know," said Ted, and kissed him again. "I love you too."
And they all lived happily ever.