(no subject)
So, there's been some drama in my life....
is anyone surprised?
Okay, so here we go.
Apparently the last Saturday of Feb, my friend K did a drop-in with the synchro team. (K was a longtime member of the team, a coach, and the best treasurer they ever had. Because her shitbox of a soon-to-be ex is doing everything he can to make her life miserable (seriously. this guy made their 13-year old choose between synchro with her friends or spending time with him. and last bit I heard was that he was trying for full custody so he could send the girl to boarding school. he left K on mother's day, that's how much of a worthless skim of scum he is) Ahem. She's had to use every spare penny she has and then some in the legal battle. So she had to take a year off from synchro.)
On Tuesday the 28th, she sent an email to the whole team saying how fun it was to swim with everyone and that she hoped she could join them again soon. The head coach, N, replied all with a rather curt message saying that since K hadn't signed the agreement at the start of the season, she wasn't a member of the team and wouldn't be allowed back. I sent an email to just the coaches and K pointing out that since K was told by L (the one who injured me and was temporary head coach while N was having a baby) that it would be okay, K wasn't in the wrong here and the problem seemed to be communication problems between the coaches.
It still bugged me so the next day I replied to the original message (to the entire team) and called N out on her rudeness. I told her she owed K an apology. The next day, N replied all with a stiffly worded email that said she was just being concise and that it was never her intention to offend anyone.
All good, right? Ha.
Last Thursday, K texted me. She got a certified letter from the swim club board kicking her off the team because of various things, culminating in (paraphrased) "incorrectly complaining and causing chaos in the Masters community." In other words, *my* email was the last straw and they kicked K out of the team she dedicated nearly a decade of her life to. K and I chatted for a while and we're going to meet up in person soon, once her mediation is done and I'm assured Mom survived her surgery (this Tuesday) I started entertaining serious doubts about going back to this club.
Friday, *I* got a certified letter. The board decided that since I 'verbally abused and harassed' N, I would be suspended until I signed a 'behavior improvement plan.' For real. We can pause while you take a moment. I replied to my email of the 1st, saying "hey, I'm suspended. I'm being punished for calling out the head coach for her rudeness. This is ridiculous."
Then I read the rulebook that we're required to read and sign every year.
Um, the 'ladder of discipline' for the club has four steps. First offense is for the coach to talk to the swimmer. Suspension isn't until step four. So I sent another group-wide email with the relevant excerpt and said "this is what is supposed to happen. is my understanding wrong?"
Yesterday (Saturday) I get a private email from the president of the club. They had decided that since I had done a major infraction, they used their power and discretion and jumped to the last rung of the 'latter (sic) of discipline'. I take a few hours to calm down a bit (man, my house is clean now, let me tell you) and reply (adding back the entire team) saying that I fail to understand how my email supposedly harassed or abused N to the point where I would be suspended without warning. (honestly, if you want to read the emails, ask me. you know my address)
That's where it stands right now with the club.
I'm thinking I may be done with them and that I might be starting up my own club. I'm still healing (it aches a lot from the cleaning but I think I can try swimming again this week) but I may be healed enough by the time all the t's are crossed and i's are dotted. (but for this week, I focus on my Mom's health and getting wing1 home from college)
So, yeah.
is anyone surprised?
Okay, so here we go.
Apparently the last Saturday of Feb, my friend K did a drop-in with the synchro team. (K was a longtime member of the team, a coach, and the best treasurer they ever had. Because her shitbox of a soon-to-be ex is doing everything he can to make her life miserable (seriously. this guy made their 13-year old choose between synchro with her friends or spending time with him. and last bit I heard was that he was trying for full custody so he could send the girl to boarding school. he left K on mother's day, that's how much of a worthless skim of scum he is) Ahem. She's had to use every spare penny she has and then some in the legal battle. So she had to take a year off from synchro.)
On Tuesday the 28th, she sent an email to the whole team saying how fun it was to swim with everyone and that she hoped she could join them again soon. The head coach, N, replied all with a rather curt message saying that since K hadn't signed the agreement at the start of the season, she wasn't a member of the team and wouldn't be allowed back. I sent an email to just the coaches and K pointing out that since K was told by L (the one who injured me and was temporary head coach while N was having a baby) that it would be okay, K wasn't in the wrong here and the problem seemed to be communication problems between the coaches.
It still bugged me so the next day I replied to the original message (to the entire team) and called N out on her rudeness. I told her she owed K an apology. The next day, N replied all with a stiffly worded email that said she was just being concise and that it was never her intention to offend anyone.
All good, right? Ha.
Last Thursday, K texted me. She got a certified letter from the swim club board kicking her off the team because of various things, culminating in (paraphrased) "incorrectly complaining and causing chaos in the Masters community." In other words, *my* email was the last straw and they kicked K out of the team she dedicated nearly a decade of her life to. K and I chatted for a while and we're going to meet up in person soon, once her mediation is done and I'm assured Mom survived her surgery (this Tuesday) I started entertaining serious doubts about going back to this club.
Friday, *I* got a certified letter. The board decided that since I 'verbally abused and harassed' N, I would be suspended until I signed a 'behavior improvement plan.' For real. We can pause while you take a moment. I replied to my email of the 1st, saying "hey, I'm suspended. I'm being punished for calling out the head coach for her rudeness. This is ridiculous."
Then I read the rulebook that we're required to read and sign every year.
Um, the 'ladder of discipline' for the club has four steps. First offense is for the coach to talk to the swimmer. Suspension isn't until step four. So I sent another group-wide email with the relevant excerpt and said "this is what is supposed to happen. is my understanding wrong?"
Yesterday (Saturday) I get a private email from the president of the club. They had decided that since I had done a major infraction, they used their power and discretion and jumped to the last rung of the 'latter (sic) of discipline'. I take a few hours to calm down a bit (man, my house is clean now, let me tell you) and reply (adding back the entire team) saying that I fail to understand how my email supposedly harassed or abused N to the point where I would be suspended without warning. (honestly, if you want to read the emails, ask me. you know my address)
That's where it stands right now with the club.
I'm thinking I may be done with them and that I might be starting up my own club. I'm still healing (it aches a lot from the cleaning but I think I can try swimming again this week) but I may be healed enough by the time all the t's are crossed and i's are dotted. (but for this week, I focus on my Mom's health and getting wing1 home from college)
So, yeah.