I've been looking in the mirror a lot lately.

Sep 22, 2009 06:27

I see a liar.
I see a cheater.
I see ignorance.
I see greed.
I see a fake.
I see sadness.
I see failure.
I see a bad person.

I've fallen behind, blown opportunities, wasted time on worthless people, disappointed my family, friends, and myself. I'm not proud of anything I have done and/or continue to do. No one talks to me anymore. I haven't seen any of my "friends" since May and I haven't left my room in over a month. Not even to help my parents with groceries. I am that pathetic. My band gave up on me. My friends gave up on me. I haven't played music in months. I've given up on it. I sleep 15 hours a day and when I'm awake I sit mindlessly in front of this computer wasting time doing absolutely nothing. I don't work out, I dont take care of myself, and I dont care who I use and hurt. I don't pay my bills. I don't even have a job to pay them but I lie to people if they ask me. I have a warrant out for my arrest and my license is going to be suspended if I don't pay parking tickets in the next upcoming days. My parents think I have money to put myself through school. I told them I did. Another lie. I quit my job by telling them I was offered a better job. Uh, lies.
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