rant.
so i definately am bumming out due to this WHOLE not-being-allowed-in-band bullshit.. supposidly this was the "best band camp ever" and i wasn't included. it REALLY jerked my wires, like MORE than ANYONE could ever possibly understand. >^<
i don't like mrs jurasko.. it's evident that she hates me as well... but still... i've beenw ith this bunch of kids my whole high school career, and it's my last year, and i'm not allowed it??? how gay! grrrr... granted b/c i didn't do band i was witht he baseball team, but still!!!!! what do i have to show from volunteering with the Hawks...true- ok the friendships.. but still it's not the saem... i was told it wasnt the same without me there this year too which kinda cheered me up/ brought em down all in one shot... some of the band peopel don't realize it wasn't my choice not to come back. i wanted to... i figured it was my senior year and i had a blast doing the majorette thing in my junior year. b'nooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!! some really WHACK non-exsistent school policy states that there's no majorettes allowed. i got one word for that...
>^
but one of the main things i missed from not being in band this year was Austin. cuz we got really close during the end of the football season and i thought it was great. now... i dont see him ever. and its rough hearing my sister say that thye hung out alot during band camp and stuff cuz that was suppposed to be me...i was supposed to be there... im supposed to be the majorette... the one the only... and it's hard not dancing or twirling when i hear the fight song...its all a lil too premature. and i swear if anyone walks out on the field to do any routine with a baton and its not me.. i'm seriously killing who ever it is... thats my thing...
do they not realize that my mom spent over $1,000 on me to be a majorette? and $100 on a really cute costume i only wore once and will never wear again? do they not realie that my senior year has officially been ruined b/c i have nothing to do with it? do they not realize how much they are hurting me by not letting me be in it? i can call discrimination b/c they only single one person out...
oh, and yes! the "wanted: 7th and 8th graders from the surrounding area interested in joining band" plea from cchs??? C'MON!!!!!! if you say you're band is toosmall then WHY THE HELL ARE YOU KICKING ME OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! UGHHHHH
im sooo pissed... and im pissed at the people saying its better off now.. its not... theres no heart or fun in the music being played... y'all know that you're just.. ugh.. STUPIDD! you know the music we played last year was friggin awesome and nothing this year can top it.. you guys know we lost our peers' support b/c we're not playing music that the student body appreciates... its terrible. it really is..
and i really do not care who reads this. i'm entitled to an opinion as much as you are. and my opinion is that of anger. anger towards the ignorant, and anger towards the so-called "authority" of the band, the ones that refused my right to join a group that is an EXTRA-CURRICULAR-ACTIVITY...it was my choice to join.. and i dont think someone has the right to decide whther or not i should or shouldn't be part of that group, especailly since ive pulled my weight for 3 years, i went to all the friggin fundraisers, i never missed a game, and i only missed practices for good reasons (like work)...
so now im venting.. and i feel like i need a cigarette.. but the last time i succombed to that feeling i lost my best friend. and im still a bit pissed about that.
overall im pissed...