[FIC] Tintinnabulation (vague pairings; PG)
Title: Tintinnabulation
By: nikki
Fandom: Katekyou Hitman Reborn
Pairing: vague 805927, 27K references
Genre: drama
Rating: PG
Warning: Yamamoto POV
Disclaimer: Katekyou Hitman Reborn © Amano Akira.
Dedication: for B-san dreamlessness and Kim simply_kim.
At first, I thought it was just the kids playing inside the music room. We were inside the strategy room at the ground floor anyway, and the music room was way above us. In the past, we had often caught Lambo and I-pin sneaking into the wide, carpeted chamber to play with the instruments stored in it. Most of the time, we would laugh it off, teasing Lambo as he tried his best to come up with a proper tune with the oboe. The rest of the time, Gokudera would give them verbal lashings for marking his old but shiny piano with their dirty fingers.
Walking out of Tsuna’s strategy room, however, we heard it again: soft staccatos, almost tinkling, barely filling the hall with sound. The melody was broken, the one playing seemingly unsure of how to deliver the music. Yet even though the music was filled with commas and ellipses, it did not fail to attract my attention. I felt Gokudera stiffen under the weight of my arm on his shoulders. I turned to him, curious of his reaction. His face was of rapt attention; I could almost see his ears curling towards the sound. He muttered something under his breath. Before I could address him, he was stepping away from me and the room, hurrying towards the large staircase to the second floor.
It was a perplexing event. I felt that I needed to know something. I turned around to ask Tsuna, but all I saw behind me was his downcast eyes as he closed the door of the room, sealing himself from my inquiry. All I can then was to sneak up and follow Gokudera towards the music room.
The music room door was already open when I reached it. Sure that Gokudera’s inside, I planned to enter, too, but I stopped short. I paused by the entrance, my eyes sweeping the room through the door which was slightly ajar. I didn’t know why I had to tiptoe around when there was nothing wrong with being curious. Maybe I was afraid of stepping into something that would make me feel uncomfortable. Content with watching from outside, I swallowed and watched the scene.
Gokudera stood beside the piano, his hands clenched into fists as they hung down his sides. He was talking to the one who sat before the piano. Short, abrupt snippets of conversation. I thought it was weird of Gokudera to talk so softly that it was merely a whisper, but I didn’t pay much attention.
“A-are you playing it just now?” Gokudera asked slowly, his voice a little uncertain. He looked at the piano with slight reverence before turning back to the other occupant of the room. “I…We heard it downstairs, the piano, I mean.” He scuffled his foot a bit and I smiled in understanding. He was not used to this kind of conversation.
The one who sat before the piano immediately stood up and bowed deeply in apology. “I am so sorry, Gokudera-san!” she said with regret in her voice. “Tsuna-kun…I mean, I started having piano lessons but I didn’t have a piano aside from the one I use in my teacher’s studio. Tsuna-kun and Bianchi-san said it was alright to use this but I really wanted to ask you. But when went here, I just…I kind of…” She stopped halfway and bit her lip. Maybe she was afraid of making him angry.
“Wanted to play it,” Gokudera finished for her. His shaky voice was steadier and gentler.
She looked up at Gokudera, surprised. “Yes, that’s exactly what I wanted to say, Gokudera-san.”
I wondered if Gokudera would be angry at the intrusion of another piano player. At first, Gokudera was mad when he found out that his sister Bianchi brought their old piano back from their previous manor. As time went by, however, Gokudera rebuilt his fondness for the instrument. I witnessed how he was slowly seduced by it again: he began by sitting on its cushioned bench, then opening the piano slowly, until he was plinking the keys and playing a random tune he had fished from his memory. I saw how he took his time in re-learning long hidden skills, wincing as his callused fingers betrayed him and murdered his previous pieces, silently smiling to himself when he managed to get his fingers flexible again to play. I knew how he loved the instrument, treating it like some kind of rare treasure.
Both persons in the music room were silent for a while, their eyes resting on the glossy piano. I took a moment to look around, in case someone saw me in such a weird position, and leaned in to watch the scene again. Gokudera had stepped towards the piano, running his fingers, those warm and gentle fingers, over the piano keys. Slowly, he turned to the young woman and nodded towards the piano. “Would you play that piece you were playing again, Sasagawa-san?”
Sasagawa Kyoko smiled and nodded. “I must warn you, though, I really suck at this piece,” she said in good nature as she sat before the piano again and placed her hands, fingers arched upwards, on the keys. When Gokudera only silently nodded, she wore a confused look on her face but did not push him further. Taking a deep breath, she stared at the piece resting on top of the keys and played.
Her fingers flew. I watched as they ghosted gracefully on the keys and gently making a sound with each of them. Her eyes were fixed on the piece before her, unlike Gokudera who played with his eyes looking at afar when they aren’t closed. The tinkle of the keys started once more, but it was slow and contrived, unlike Gokudera’s freely-flowing notes. Sasagawa leaned towards the piece, trying her best to read it, but she continuously tripped over her notes. Eventually, she punctuated her performance with a sigh.
“I told you I am not good yet,” she said accusingly, her laughter tinkling like her notes before. “There’s just too many notes and I haven’t memorized them yet, especially this.” She pointed to the piece, but I couldn’t see where she pointed. “The notes here are almost running, my fingers couldn’t catch up.” She turned to Gokudera, in her face an obvious expectation of criticism.
But the criticism did not come. Instead, Gokudera unclenched his hands and crossed them over his chest. “Franz Liszt’s La Campanella , etude for piano in G sharp minor,” he said. He walked nearer to the piano seat and leaned over the piece. “You have only been playing for how long? Is your teacher a murderer for giving you such a piece?”
Sasagawa sheepishly smiled as she scratched her cheek. “Ah, not really. Actually, I was the one who wanted the piece. I heard um…someone playing it and I wanted to learn it so there…” she regretfully shrugged. “I guess I’m still no good.”
Suddenly, Gokudera urged her to move as he sat beside her on the bench. “Silly woman,” he said. “Of course you’re still no good. What do you expect from a beginner anyway?!” He played a scale on the piano and looked at Kyoko who sat beside him. “Start from this part.”
“Eh?” I mimicked Sasagawa’s reaction silently.
Gokudera pointed impatiently to a part of the piece. “Start here and read the notes carefully. I’m going to teach you how to play Liszt!”
“Ah, yes, yes!”
Sasagawa played Liszt while Gokudera tutored her on pedal use and terminology. La Campanella tinkled all over the room, like a handbell of a master calling for his butler. I stood in the corridor, feeling empty while sounds filled the hall.
--
“You’ve been hanging out in the music room a lot recently.”
Gokudera gave me a surprised look. We were on our way up the stairs when he announced that he had to bid me good night for he would be going to the music room. I didn’t mind it at first, but this time’s the third this week, and I was starting to get annoyed. I blurted out my observation without thinking and I regretted it after seeing the look on Gokudera’s face.
“I’ve been tutoring Kyoko-san with her piano lessons,” he said, his ears turning a bit red, or was it just my imagination. He did not notice me flinch upon hearing him mention her name. “It’s a rather difficult piece, but she wanted to perfect it, so…”
It was an honest statement. I could see no effort in Gokudera’s part to hide about the piano lessons. However, I can’t help but think that there’s something else. “Oh. Well, get going then. You don’t want to keep Sasagawa-san waiting, now, do you?” I said with a grin.
I let him go.
He gave me a grateful grin as he briskly ascended the stairs. At the landing, though, he turned around to look down at me. “It’s my mother’s piece…a long time ago.” I stopped in mid-step, my eyes meeting his. “She played it for me once, when she visited me. I was young then but I can still remember how her fingers danced over the keys. It was something I can never forget.”
Before I could think of a proper reply - of whether I’d laugh it off or not - Gokudera was gone.
I trudged up the stairs, my steps echoing all over the house now that there was no Gokudera bantering with me enough to make noise to drown the sounds. I did my usual mind games, telling myself that Gokudera was doing something good and I couldn’t see anything wrong with it, but at the back of my mind, something kept poking me about things I’d rather not realize. Things like how I am not used to walking around without a partner or how each sound of the piano keys stab through my body, sending searing pain I shouldn’t be feeling.
The pain. I felt it as I reached the top of the stairs and the sounds wafted towards me again. I steeled myself and started to walk to my room when I saw Tsuna leaning against the wall across the door of the music room. Silently, I crept towards him. He had a satisfied look on his face, but I wondered why with the satisfaction came a smile so sad. He nodded to me as he noticed me and gestured for me to stay. At that time, I realized what was happening and I had to know the reason behind it.
“Why?” I asked as I leaned against the wall, beside him.
Tsuna was still smiling. “Kyoko-chan wanted to learn how to play an instrument and I just suggested that she take piano lessons.”
I neither budged nor made a sound, my eyes trained to the door of the music room. The music coming from behind the door was more solid now, the tinkling had evolved to ringing. Sasagawa had improved.
“Whenever I get rescued or aided by Gokudera-kun, I always felt that he would die because of me any time,” Tsuna continued without waiting for my answer. “I know that he gave me all of his life and he was satisfied with me being a leader worthy of the famiglia name. But I am not satisfied that way.” He pushed himself off the wall. “Whenever I remember how much Gokudera-kun had given me and how much he had gone through, I can’t help but feel guilty. But I do not know what to do for him. He rarely needed my help since he’s able and intelligent. I can’t think of anything I can do for him.”
“But…” Before I could finish, Tsuna stopped me as he raised his hand.
“I’m just a normal person anyway,” Tsuna said. “I’m just someone who do not have the kind of power that can grant people’s wishes. That’s why.” He started walking away from the music room. I couldn’t help but follow him as I was confused with his words.
“Tsuna, what do you mean?” I pressed. “You’ve done a lot for us and…”
He stopped walking but he did not face me anymore. Instead, he chose to hide his face in the shadows of the hallway. “See, I don’t know what I can do for Gokudera-kun. So I gave him what I know he’ll treasure the most. Kyoko-chan…she gave me the opportunity. And I know that it would me him and her happy.”
“What is it? What does Gokudera treasure the most?” I choked. My throat seemed so parched that I can’t help but swallow.
I gave a start when Tsuna turned around, his eyes wide and gentle. They were full of understanding, yet I could not understand their depths. “The memories of his mother,” Tsuna answered quietly. “Gokudera. He was most happy when talking about his mother. And Kyoko-chan…she had always been the caring, nurturing one. They’ll be happy.”
We stood in the corridor in silence. We were a little far from the music room and muffled notes still reached our ears. Each sound of the keys that sounded like the ringing of several bells jarred my bones, but I kept standing. “I…I do not think that happiness should only concern a couple of persons,” I finally said, my jaw tightening. “Aren’t you just using…”
“What do you mean, Yamamoto?” Tsuna asked, his voice shaking.
I frowned, even though I didn’t want to show this side of me to a person I respected. “Tsuna, you have outdone yourself this time. I appreciate your concern and gratefulness, Tsuna, but I cannot accept this.” I turned around and walked towards the music room.
“I’m so stupid, aren’t I?” Tsuna whispered from the shadows of the corridor.
“You’re not stupid,” I said, pausing for a moment. “I’m just a selfish man.”
I heard a thump as Tsuna fell on his knees to the floor. I stopped in front of the music room door, fixed a smile on my face and grabbed both handles of the door. “Gokudera’s happiness cannot be decided by anyone except himself,” I muttered. “That’s why, all the more, I can’t have him leaving my side so easily.”
I pushed the doors open, breaking the sound of bells and Gokudera’s fantasy of a memory into a million smithereens. Soon, I shall sweep them away, under the carpet until the sound cannot reach us anymore.
.end.
** La Campanella is a piano piece composed by Franz Liszt. You can see a video of the piece being played by Yundi Li here. It's a beautiful piece, imho. :).
By: nikki
Fandom: Katekyou Hitman Reborn
Pairing: vague 805927, 27K references
Genre: drama
Rating: PG
Warning: Yamamoto POV
Disclaimer: Katekyou Hitman Reborn © Amano Akira.
Dedication: for B-san dreamlessness and Kim simply_kim.
At first, I thought it was just the kids playing inside the music room. We were inside the strategy room at the ground floor anyway, and the music room was way above us. In the past, we had often caught Lambo and I-pin sneaking into the wide, carpeted chamber to play with the instruments stored in it. Most of the time, we would laugh it off, teasing Lambo as he tried his best to come up with a proper tune with the oboe. The rest of the time, Gokudera would give them verbal lashings for marking his old but shiny piano with their dirty fingers.
Walking out of Tsuna’s strategy room, however, we heard it again: soft staccatos, almost tinkling, barely filling the hall with sound. The melody was broken, the one playing seemingly unsure of how to deliver the music. Yet even though the music was filled with commas and ellipses, it did not fail to attract my attention. I felt Gokudera stiffen under the weight of my arm on his shoulders. I turned to him, curious of his reaction. His face was of rapt attention; I could almost see his ears curling towards the sound. He muttered something under his breath. Before I could address him, he was stepping away from me and the room, hurrying towards the large staircase to the second floor.
It was a perplexing event. I felt that I needed to know something. I turned around to ask Tsuna, but all I saw behind me was his downcast eyes as he closed the door of the room, sealing himself from my inquiry. All I can then was to sneak up and follow Gokudera towards the music room.
The music room door was already open when I reached it. Sure that Gokudera’s inside, I planned to enter, too, but I stopped short. I paused by the entrance, my eyes sweeping the room through the door which was slightly ajar. I didn’t know why I had to tiptoe around when there was nothing wrong with being curious. Maybe I was afraid of stepping into something that would make me feel uncomfortable. Content with watching from outside, I swallowed and watched the scene.
Gokudera stood beside the piano, his hands clenched into fists as they hung down his sides. He was talking to the one who sat before the piano. Short, abrupt snippets of conversation. I thought it was weird of Gokudera to talk so softly that it was merely a whisper, but I didn’t pay much attention.
“A-are you playing it just now?” Gokudera asked slowly, his voice a little uncertain. He looked at the piano with slight reverence before turning back to the other occupant of the room. “I…We heard it downstairs, the piano, I mean.” He scuffled his foot a bit and I smiled in understanding. He was not used to this kind of conversation.
The one who sat before the piano immediately stood up and bowed deeply in apology. “I am so sorry, Gokudera-san!” she said with regret in her voice. “Tsuna-kun…I mean, I started having piano lessons but I didn’t have a piano aside from the one I use in my teacher’s studio. Tsuna-kun and Bianchi-san said it was alright to use this but I really wanted to ask you. But when went here, I just…I kind of…” She stopped halfway and bit her lip. Maybe she was afraid of making him angry.
“Wanted to play it,” Gokudera finished for her. His shaky voice was steadier and gentler.
She looked up at Gokudera, surprised. “Yes, that’s exactly what I wanted to say, Gokudera-san.”
I wondered if Gokudera would be angry at the intrusion of another piano player. At first, Gokudera was mad when he found out that his sister Bianchi brought their old piano back from their previous manor. As time went by, however, Gokudera rebuilt his fondness for the instrument. I witnessed how he was slowly seduced by it again: he began by sitting on its cushioned bench, then opening the piano slowly, until he was plinking the keys and playing a random tune he had fished from his memory. I saw how he took his time in re-learning long hidden skills, wincing as his callused fingers betrayed him and murdered his previous pieces, silently smiling to himself when he managed to get his fingers flexible again to play. I knew how he loved the instrument, treating it like some kind of rare treasure.
Both persons in the music room were silent for a while, their eyes resting on the glossy piano. I took a moment to look around, in case someone saw me in such a weird position, and leaned in to watch the scene again. Gokudera had stepped towards the piano, running his fingers, those warm and gentle fingers, over the piano keys. Slowly, he turned to the young woman and nodded towards the piano. “Would you play that piece you were playing again, Sasagawa-san?”
Sasagawa Kyoko smiled and nodded. “I must warn you, though, I really suck at this piece,” she said in good nature as she sat before the piano again and placed her hands, fingers arched upwards, on the keys. When Gokudera only silently nodded, she wore a confused look on her face but did not push him further. Taking a deep breath, she stared at the piece resting on top of the keys and played.
Her fingers flew. I watched as they ghosted gracefully on the keys and gently making a sound with each of them. Her eyes were fixed on the piece before her, unlike Gokudera who played with his eyes looking at afar when they aren’t closed. The tinkle of the keys started once more, but it was slow and contrived, unlike Gokudera’s freely-flowing notes. Sasagawa leaned towards the piece, trying her best to read it, but she continuously tripped over her notes. Eventually, she punctuated her performance with a sigh.
“I told you I am not good yet,” she said accusingly, her laughter tinkling like her notes before. “There’s just too many notes and I haven’t memorized them yet, especially this.” She pointed to the piece, but I couldn’t see where she pointed. “The notes here are almost running, my fingers couldn’t catch up.” She turned to Gokudera, in her face an obvious expectation of criticism.
But the criticism did not come. Instead, Gokudera unclenched his hands and crossed them over his chest. “Franz Liszt’s La Campanella , etude for piano in G sharp minor,” he said. He walked nearer to the piano seat and leaned over the piece. “You have only been playing for how long? Is your teacher a murderer for giving you such a piece?”
Sasagawa sheepishly smiled as she scratched her cheek. “Ah, not really. Actually, I was the one who wanted the piece. I heard um…someone playing it and I wanted to learn it so there…” she regretfully shrugged. “I guess I’m still no good.”
Suddenly, Gokudera urged her to move as he sat beside her on the bench. “Silly woman,” he said. “Of course you’re still no good. What do you expect from a beginner anyway?!” He played a scale on the piano and looked at Kyoko who sat beside him. “Start from this part.”
“Eh?” I mimicked Sasagawa’s reaction silently.
Gokudera pointed impatiently to a part of the piece. “Start here and read the notes carefully. I’m going to teach you how to play Liszt!”
“Ah, yes, yes!”
Sasagawa played Liszt while Gokudera tutored her on pedal use and terminology. La Campanella tinkled all over the room, like a handbell of a master calling for his butler. I stood in the corridor, feeling empty while sounds filled the hall.
--
“You’ve been hanging out in the music room a lot recently.”
Gokudera gave me a surprised look. We were on our way up the stairs when he announced that he had to bid me good night for he would be going to the music room. I didn’t mind it at first, but this time’s the third this week, and I was starting to get annoyed. I blurted out my observation without thinking and I regretted it after seeing the look on Gokudera’s face.
“I’ve been tutoring Kyoko-san with her piano lessons,” he said, his ears turning a bit red, or was it just my imagination. He did not notice me flinch upon hearing him mention her name. “It’s a rather difficult piece, but she wanted to perfect it, so…”
It was an honest statement. I could see no effort in Gokudera’s part to hide about the piano lessons. However, I can’t help but think that there’s something else. “Oh. Well, get going then. You don’t want to keep Sasagawa-san waiting, now, do you?” I said with a grin.
I let him go.
He gave me a grateful grin as he briskly ascended the stairs. At the landing, though, he turned around to look down at me. “It’s my mother’s piece…a long time ago.” I stopped in mid-step, my eyes meeting his. “She played it for me once, when she visited me. I was young then but I can still remember how her fingers danced over the keys. It was something I can never forget.”
Before I could think of a proper reply - of whether I’d laugh it off or not - Gokudera was gone.
I trudged up the stairs, my steps echoing all over the house now that there was no Gokudera bantering with me enough to make noise to drown the sounds. I did my usual mind games, telling myself that Gokudera was doing something good and I couldn’t see anything wrong with it, but at the back of my mind, something kept poking me about things I’d rather not realize. Things like how I am not used to walking around without a partner or how each sound of the piano keys stab through my body, sending searing pain I shouldn’t be feeling.
The pain. I felt it as I reached the top of the stairs and the sounds wafted towards me again. I steeled myself and started to walk to my room when I saw Tsuna leaning against the wall across the door of the music room. Silently, I crept towards him. He had a satisfied look on his face, but I wondered why with the satisfaction came a smile so sad. He nodded to me as he noticed me and gestured for me to stay. At that time, I realized what was happening and I had to know the reason behind it.
“Why?” I asked as I leaned against the wall, beside him.
Tsuna was still smiling. “Kyoko-chan wanted to learn how to play an instrument and I just suggested that she take piano lessons.”
I neither budged nor made a sound, my eyes trained to the door of the music room. The music coming from behind the door was more solid now, the tinkling had evolved to ringing. Sasagawa had improved.
“Whenever I get rescued or aided by Gokudera-kun, I always felt that he would die because of me any time,” Tsuna continued without waiting for my answer. “I know that he gave me all of his life and he was satisfied with me being a leader worthy of the famiglia name. But I am not satisfied that way.” He pushed himself off the wall. “Whenever I remember how much Gokudera-kun had given me and how much he had gone through, I can’t help but feel guilty. But I do not know what to do for him. He rarely needed my help since he’s able and intelligent. I can’t think of anything I can do for him.”
“But…” Before I could finish, Tsuna stopped me as he raised his hand.
“I’m just a normal person anyway,” Tsuna said. “I’m just someone who do not have the kind of power that can grant people’s wishes. That’s why.” He started walking away from the music room. I couldn’t help but follow him as I was confused with his words.
“Tsuna, what do you mean?” I pressed. “You’ve done a lot for us and…”
He stopped walking but he did not face me anymore. Instead, he chose to hide his face in the shadows of the hallway. “See, I don’t know what I can do for Gokudera-kun. So I gave him what I know he’ll treasure the most. Kyoko-chan…she gave me the opportunity. And I know that it would me him and her happy.”
“What is it? What does Gokudera treasure the most?” I choked. My throat seemed so parched that I can’t help but swallow.
I gave a start when Tsuna turned around, his eyes wide and gentle. They were full of understanding, yet I could not understand their depths. “The memories of his mother,” Tsuna answered quietly. “Gokudera. He was most happy when talking about his mother. And Kyoko-chan…she had always been the caring, nurturing one. They’ll be happy.”
We stood in the corridor in silence. We were a little far from the music room and muffled notes still reached our ears. Each sound of the keys that sounded like the ringing of several bells jarred my bones, but I kept standing. “I…I do not think that happiness should only concern a couple of persons,” I finally said, my jaw tightening. “Aren’t you just using…”
“What do you mean, Yamamoto?” Tsuna asked, his voice shaking.
I frowned, even though I didn’t want to show this side of me to a person I respected. “Tsuna, you have outdone yourself this time. I appreciate your concern and gratefulness, Tsuna, but I cannot accept this.” I turned around and walked towards the music room.
“I’m so stupid, aren’t I?” Tsuna whispered from the shadows of the corridor.
“You’re not stupid,” I said, pausing for a moment. “I’m just a selfish man.”
I heard a thump as Tsuna fell on his knees to the floor. I stopped in front of the music room door, fixed a smile on my face and grabbed both handles of the door. “Gokudera’s happiness cannot be decided by anyone except himself,” I muttered. “That’s why, all the more, I can’t have him leaving my side so easily.”
I pushed the doors open, breaking the sound of bells and Gokudera’s fantasy of a memory into a million smithereens. Soon, I shall sweep them away, under the carpet until the sound cannot reach us anymore.
.end.
** La Campanella is a piano piece composed by Franz Liszt. You can see a video of the piece being played by Yundi Li here. It's a beautiful piece, imho. :).