dont be selfish
So the beautiful 3 months mel and i have spent are over now, in a sense. We are going to continue being best friends and hanging out, and talking on the phone just no more kisses :[ or cuddling or anything its going to be friends. Its what she needs right now and im not going to be selfish and try to get her back if i really do care about her this much im going to stick by her and make sure that the pain is all gone, make sure that she is okay before i look back and try to fix things, maybe this is what we need things happen for a reason all i know is that if i do deserve better, i dont want better, i want her. Last night we stayed up talking for hours, when we stopped, we both went online and then when we couldnt do that anymore, when the emotions were seeping out of the speakers and out of the computer we returned to the phone. more tears. please don't cry, your so beautiful, you don't deserve to feel this way. I stayed up all night, i couldn't get a wink of sleep why? i don't know exactly why but i know i managed to talk to her untill sunrise. The sun came out and it made things a bit better brought a better day, new feelings, new emotions, more pain. I hope this doesn't keep me up for nights, shit, I hope this doesn't keep HER up for nights, i just want her to know that the last thing i do is hate her..i completely understand why this had to end and im going to accept things. She has taught me so much, primarily, Change is the one constant thing in life you always need change us as humans always need refreshment always need new thrills and new feelings. And im so sorry for say all those "i love you's" most of them counted, but most were just because you said them back to me and it felt nice to be "loved".
My feelings for mel where never manufactured or fake i honestly care for her and i will not stop because of this, this is what we need to do. I prayed for her today, god is going to send her a guardian angel hes going to take care of her and bring her lots of happiness the kind i was never capable of giving her, I pray the next guy, whoever it may be really see's what a beautiful and amazing person she really is i hope he understands what she can teach him and how much she will change him, how much she changed me. For the past 3 months ive seen this little boy grow ive seen him learn and ive seen him love and I have felt true happiness. The smiles, the laughs, the kisses, the hugs, the "i miss you's" and "i love you's" were not in vain and they are all cherished in this little heart of mine you know, the one we couldn't find that night lying in your bed hah. Im not going to lie, mel i miss you dearly. IF this has done anything it has made us better friends and i always need a best friend, i will always be here i promise. this hurts so much but the pain was worth it always and forever
yours truely,
alfredo iglesias
My feelings for mel where never manufactured or fake i honestly care for her and i will not stop because of this, this is what we need to do. I prayed for her today, god is going to send her a guardian angel hes going to take care of her and bring her lots of happiness the kind i was never capable of giving her, I pray the next guy, whoever it may be really see's what a beautiful and amazing person she really is i hope he understands what she can teach him and how much she will change him, how much she changed me. For the past 3 months ive seen this little boy grow ive seen him learn and ive seen him love and I have felt true happiness. The smiles, the laughs, the kisses, the hugs, the "i miss you's" and "i love you's" were not in vain and they are all cherished in this little heart of mine you know, the one we couldn't find that night lying in your bed hah. Im not going to lie, mel i miss you dearly. IF this has done anything it has made us better friends and i always need a best friend, i will always be here i promise. this hurts so much but the pain was worth it always and forever
yours truely,
alfredo iglesias