It's been a while...
I'm back! Reopen the live journal account and pay off the loan sharks!
So I decided to start posting on my livejournal again. I don't really know why. Maybe things seemed easier when I could look at them on a screen. Maybe I was just bored. Maybe I'm desperate. Maybe I miss the fuck out of someone. Maybe I'm retarded for the girl. Maybe, you're gonna be the one that saves me, afterall, you're my wonderwall... Maybe it's all of the motherfucking above.
Tonight I decided to stay up and pull an all nighter. I've got just over ten hours to go if I'm going to pull it off. I can, and I will damn it. Why am I doing such a perposterous thing one might ask? Because I can. Simply because I can. And maybe I will start to sleep like a normal person if I just get really tired one night and go to bed at a reasonable time and force myself to get up at a reasonable time. Screw you, they are my dreams, I am allowed to have them if I want to.
I got to see Hannah over vacation (Thursday night). It had been a while since I saw her. It felt so good to see her again. And I honestly think that she felt the same way about seeing me too. She cozied up to me when we were watching The Lord of The Rings. I did put my arm around her first, but she nuzzled right up to me when I did it. It felt so right. It was awesome. I don't care what people say, nothing beats the feeling of having a girl in your arms. You know that she needs you and you need her. I miss Hannah deeply. I didn't realize it until she was back in my arms. I fucked up things with her the first time, now that I may have reopened the gates with us (a gentleman never tells, come now), I am determined not to screw this one up. I think that if I play it right, we may be able to get back together this summer. As much as I'd love courting her while I am away and we won't see each other, I wouldn't want to do that to her. It would be too hard on her, she might feel obligated to stay home and talk to me, or she might not ever talk to me and I might go legally insane. It's crazy when someone has that power over you. So it's official, I'm retarded for the girl. Save my soul.
I spent that few hours with her. And with all of the shit I've been through in the military, I realized that everything that I've done has been worth it. Just that one night makes it all worth it. And I pray to God that if I go to war one day, or I am put to use, other people will feel the same way about what they've had. Else I honestly don't know what I'd be doing it for.
Advice for this post: When all hope is seems lost, don't forget about the path you took to get where you are.
So I decided to start posting on my livejournal again. I don't really know why. Maybe things seemed easier when I could look at them on a screen. Maybe I was just bored. Maybe I'm desperate. Maybe I miss the fuck out of someone. Maybe I'm retarded for the girl. Maybe, you're gonna be the one that saves me, afterall, you're my wonderwall... Maybe it's all of the motherfucking above.
Tonight I decided to stay up and pull an all nighter. I've got just over ten hours to go if I'm going to pull it off. I can, and I will damn it. Why am I doing such a perposterous thing one might ask? Because I can. Simply because I can. And maybe I will start to sleep like a normal person if I just get really tired one night and go to bed at a reasonable time and force myself to get up at a reasonable time. Screw you, they are my dreams, I am allowed to have them if I want to.
I got to see Hannah over vacation (Thursday night). It had been a while since I saw her. It felt so good to see her again. And I honestly think that she felt the same way about seeing me too. She cozied up to me when we were watching The Lord of The Rings. I did put my arm around her first, but she nuzzled right up to me when I did it. It felt so right. It was awesome. I don't care what people say, nothing beats the feeling of having a girl in your arms. You know that she needs you and you need her. I miss Hannah deeply. I didn't realize it until she was back in my arms. I fucked up things with her the first time, now that I may have reopened the gates with us (a gentleman never tells, come now), I am determined not to screw this one up. I think that if I play it right, we may be able to get back together this summer. As much as I'd love courting her while I am away and we won't see each other, I wouldn't want to do that to her. It would be too hard on her, she might feel obligated to stay home and talk to me, or she might not ever talk to me and I might go legally insane. It's crazy when someone has that power over you. So it's official, I'm retarded for the girl. Save my soul.
I spent that few hours with her. And with all of the shit I've been through in the military, I realized that everything that I've done has been worth it. Just that one night makes it all worth it. And I pray to God that if I go to war one day, or I am put to use, other people will feel the same way about what they've had. Else I honestly don't know what I'd be doing it for.
Advice for this post: When all hope is seems lost, don't forget about the path you took to get where you are.