oh god
ugh. i always get so worried. i wish everything would just be ok. i wish everyone could just be ok!!! i wish my friends were happy and didnt have to pretend or lie about being ok. or 'hide the truth'. they are the people who mean the most to me in the world. what would i do with out them??? stupid questin...i couldnt even live with out them. they mean so god damn fucking much to me. i wish they knew how much i need them, how much i care about them. how i COULDNT LIVE WITHOUT THEM.Erin always makes fun of how i cry..but its not even like how i usually cry. its just when im crying so hard that i cant breath.
today i called erin a peice of shit cause something made me sad and worried again. i didnt mean it. i never would. i really regret saying it. because erin means so much to me.same with al. more then people understand.i kno i dont mean as much to them as they mean to me..its ok tho. i mean, i kind-a wish i did..because they mean more to me then the world combined. and its kind-a a wierd feeling knowing i could never mean as much to them as they do to me...=\. i dont kno. i could never say i hate them because i dont. and i never will and never could. im just so fucking worried. ahh i dont ever kno what to do or say..and i always drag Al into my problems..when i dont kno what to do or say i turn to her and put the shit on her shoulders which is so fucking selfish of me. i cant help it tho. Al doesnt need the shit i lay on her.im real sorry. ok. well..i dont kno what to say anymore. sometimes i wont let me emotions out when i really need to. when i have to cry so bad.i just cant. i dont kno..i just somehow dont let it out..but w/e i cant take the shit in this world. i hope more then anything that they will be ok..atleast..but hopfully good or even great. god i hope
-katie
today i called erin a peice of shit cause something made me sad and worried again. i didnt mean it. i never would. i really regret saying it. because erin means so much to me.same with al. more then people understand.i kno i dont mean as much to them as they mean to me..its ok tho. i mean, i kind-a wish i did..because they mean more to me then the world combined. and its kind-a a wierd feeling knowing i could never mean as much to them as they do to me...=\. i dont kno. i could never say i hate them because i dont. and i never will and never could. im just so fucking worried. ahh i dont ever kno what to do or say..and i always drag Al into my problems..when i dont kno what to do or say i turn to her and put the shit on her shoulders which is so fucking selfish of me. i cant help it tho. Al doesnt need the shit i lay on her.im real sorry. ok. well..i dont kno what to say anymore. sometimes i wont let me emotions out when i really need to. when i have to cry so bad.i just cant. i dont kno..i just somehow dont let it out..but w/e i cant take the shit in this world. i hope more then anything that they will be ok..atleast..but hopfully good or even great. god i hope
-katie