This Don't Even Feel Like Falling (Part 17)
Title: This Don't Even Feel Like Falling (Part 17)
Author:xjekkix
Word Count: 723 words
Summary: Acting is her life, but it’s time she separated work from play.
Rating: PG-13, some swearing.
Disclaimer: This is not real.
Lindsay waits nervously outside of the building where she’ll soon have her audition. She lights up a cigarette after having just stomped one out and taps her foot on the pavement until she decides it’s time to go inside.
She knows she’s good at what she does - her fan base is proof of that - and yet every audition is just as nerve-racking as the last.
She reads over her lines in her head, keeping an eye on her watch. Time feels like it’s crawling by - she just wants to get this over with 0 when the building doors fly open.
When she sees Samantha, the girl looking lost, her entire body feels numb with happiness. She tries not to sound too excited when she shouts to get her attention.
The only people she can remember ever coming to support her during auditions or other important moments in her life are her mother and her grandmother whenever possible. She feels honoured that Samantha came, but also feels an unexpected pressure now not only to impress her judges, but this girl - someone who’s shown her that friendship can be so much more - and she’s not just thinking about its “added benefits”.
As always, once on stage she feels at home. For even a few moments, an escape from her own life is welcome - a chance to see that she’s got it pretty good.
She catches Samantha’s eye during her performance and feels like she might swallow her own tongue. The girl stares back at her intently, nothing but admiration in her eyes. She can’t believe it - that someone so levelheaded and together as Samantha is would look up to her.
She delivers her last line with conviction and gusto - the line reminiscent of herself, always pretending or hiding - and is content that even if she doesn’t land the role, she’s just gained a whole world of knowledge.
Samantha sneaks out the back door while Lindsay meets with the judges briefly to talk callback details. She watches Samantha leaving, hoping the girl will wait for her outside.
Outside, Samantha is nowhere to be found. Lindsay isn’t really surprised; she’s used to being left, but strangely this time it hurts a little more. She feels like she wants to cry but nothing happens - she’s numb, and it’s much easier to cry for a role than for herself.
As she walks, she lights up a cigarette and slides her heeled sandals off one at a time. She carries them, barefoot on the pavement. Her feet feel as vulnerable to injury now as she does.
You had your chance to be happy, she tells herself. But you fucked it up and she deserves better than you anyway.
Her cigarette has gone out and so she holds it in her lips while rummaging through her purse to find her lighter. Having not found one in her large bag by the time she reaches her car, she figures there ought to be one somewhere in there.
“You were incredible in there,” she hears a voice say, her face still stuck in her purse looking for a light. “My mind is officially blown.”
She raises her head slowly, a little embarrassed about her doubts. Samantha leans casually against her car’s rear bumper, cigarette tucked behind her ear and a hand full of fresh picked flowers.
Lindsay blushes profusely. “Thank you,” she says, graciously taking the flowers and smelling them instinctively. There is so much more she wants to say but can’t find the words. For a girl who always has something to say, being rendered speechless is a feat.
The two stand staring at their own shoes for some time, not sure what to talk about.
“Come on, let’s go celebrate,” Lindsay says finally, grabbing a sweater from the backseat of her car.
“You already got the part?” Samantha says excitedly.
Lindsay laughs. “I’m not sure yet.”
“So then what are we celebrating?”
Lindsay takes a deep breath in, closing her car door gently. “My decision to be completely honest and true to myself from now on,” she says confidently. Samantha looks at her, confused.
“I’ll explain on our way. I’m starving,” Lindsay chuckles, linking her arm with Samantha’s. She’s not sure how her decision, and pending confession, will affect things but already she feels a huge weight lifted from her shoulders.
Author:xjekkix
Word Count: 723 words
Summary: Acting is her life, but it’s time she separated work from play.
Rating: PG-13, some swearing.
Disclaimer: This is not real.
Lindsay waits nervously outside of the building where she’ll soon have her audition. She lights up a cigarette after having just stomped one out and taps her foot on the pavement until she decides it’s time to go inside.
She knows she’s good at what she does - her fan base is proof of that - and yet every audition is just as nerve-racking as the last.
She reads over her lines in her head, keeping an eye on her watch. Time feels like it’s crawling by - she just wants to get this over with 0 when the building doors fly open.
When she sees Samantha, the girl looking lost, her entire body feels numb with happiness. She tries not to sound too excited when she shouts to get her attention.
The only people she can remember ever coming to support her during auditions or other important moments in her life are her mother and her grandmother whenever possible. She feels honoured that Samantha came, but also feels an unexpected pressure now not only to impress her judges, but this girl - someone who’s shown her that friendship can be so much more - and she’s not just thinking about its “added benefits”.
As always, once on stage she feels at home. For even a few moments, an escape from her own life is welcome - a chance to see that she’s got it pretty good.
She catches Samantha’s eye during her performance and feels like she might swallow her own tongue. The girl stares back at her intently, nothing but admiration in her eyes. She can’t believe it - that someone so levelheaded and together as Samantha is would look up to her.
She delivers her last line with conviction and gusto - the line reminiscent of herself, always pretending or hiding - and is content that even if she doesn’t land the role, she’s just gained a whole world of knowledge.
Samantha sneaks out the back door while Lindsay meets with the judges briefly to talk callback details. She watches Samantha leaving, hoping the girl will wait for her outside.
Outside, Samantha is nowhere to be found. Lindsay isn’t really surprised; she’s used to being left, but strangely this time it hurts a little more. She feels like she wants to cry but nothing happens - she’s numb, and it’s much easier to cry for a role than for herself.
As she walks, she lights up a cigarette and slides her heeled sandals off one at a time. She carries them, barefoot on the pavement. Her feet feel as vulnerable to injury now as she does.
You had your chance to be happy, she tells herself. But you fucked it up and she deserves better than you anyway.
Her cigarette has gone out and so she holds it in her lips while rummaging through her purse to find her lighter. Having not found one in her large bag by the time she reaches her car, she figures there ought to be one somewhere in there.
“You were incredible in there,” she hears a voice say, her face still stuck in her purse looking for a light. “My mind is officially blown.”
She raises her head slowly, a little embarrassed about her doubts. Samantha leans casually against her car’s rear bumper, cigarette tucked behind her ear and a hand full of fresh picked flowers.
Lindsay blushes profusely. “Thank you,” she says, graciously taking the flowers and smelling them instinctively. There is so much more she wants to say but can’t find the words. For a girl who always has something to say, being rendered speechless is a feat.
The two stand staring at their own shoes for some time, not sure what to talk about.
“Come on, let’s go celebrate,” Lindsay says finally, grabbing a sweater from the backseat of her car.
“You already got the part?” Samantha says excitedly.
Lindsay laughs. “I’m not sure yet.”
“So then what are we celebrating?”
Lindsay takes a deep breath in, closing her car door gently. “My decision to be completely honest and true to myself from now on,” she says confidently. Samantha looks at her, confused.
“I’ll explain on our way. I’m starving,” Lindsay chuckles, linking her arm with Samantha’s. She’s not sure how her decision, and pending confession, will affect things but already she feels a huge weight lifted from her shoulders.