(no subject)
Ok regathered thoughts,
As mbif put it parents dont actually attempt to parent these days and there is a number of factors involved in this, younger pregnancies, leading to kids who think they can continue their lives as it was prior to having a baby. This mentality likely carries on into adulthood.
The concept that money=happines so they work, and work on improving their standing with work while they are at home. Giving up vacations sending kids to school so they dont have to deal with them.....honestly 12+ years of school, is not an effecient model considering what you learn in that time (particularly public school) My view on this is that its a timesink, a system setup for free babysitting, both parents can work and improve their standing, so they can keep up with the Jones'.
Or in a single parent environment the parent can basically feel free to work a job or two to make ends meet without worrying what their child is doing at home (unless of course they are a delenquent.....whic likely spurs from lack of attention)
So why is this model so popular when it is so utterly inneficient?
(Look at the US graduation rates, rising teen violence/promiscuity/pregnancy/alcohol/smoking/drug use)
Because it is the way that people think things should be,
1) Goto shcool
2)Graduate
3) goto college
4) get a degree
5) get a job
6) retire
7) die
Somewhere along that list you hope to fall in love have kids, get rich, travel etc etc etc.
But for the most part that is the comonly distrubuted model for success.
How many people do you know when asked what they want to do with their lives respond, be happy? be a good parent? be healthy?
Its typically I want to be rich, or successful or defining what you want to do as an occupation with your life.
What happened to actually watching your kids being responsible for their development and growth, knowing where they are and what they are doing.
Its been replaced by sending them to school, getting a sitter, buying them a television, letting get on the net, paying them money for good behavior, letting them do what they want, and generally ignoring them.
Success= Tangible posetions when compared to your peers?
Sucess= Doing well at your job and being promoted?
Success= owning multiple cars and houses?
For me to define success is a difficult thing, but I know I will not define it by the ballance of my bank account be it large or small, nor by the amount of credit I can utilize, nor by some company promoting me to an arbitrary position on the corporate totem pole. Nor will it be any of the factors that I find ludicrous (at least I pray I wont lose sight and fall prey to the system that I see as a trap)
I think it will be defined by myself my personal satisfaction with my own existance, hopefully my abillity and success in molding and shaping what children I may have into adults who use their minds instead of opting to conform to the mold that is set in place before them.
As mbif put it parents dont actually attempt to parent these days and there is a number of factors involved in this, younger pregnancies, leading to kids who think they can continue their lives as it was prior to having a baby. This mentality likely carries on into adulthood.
The concept that money=happines so they work, and work on improving their standing with work while they are at home. Giving up vacations sending kids to school so they dont have to deal with them.....honestly 12+ years of school, is not an effecient model considering what you learn in that time (particularly public school) My view on this is that its a timesink, a system setup for free babysitting, both parents can work and improve their standing, so they can keep up with the Jones'.
Or in a single parent environment the parent can basically feel free to work a job or two to make ends meet without worrying what their child is doing at home (unless of course they are a delenquent.....whic likely spurs from lack of attention)
So why is this model so popular when it is so utterly inneficient?
(Look at the US graduation rates, rising teen violence/promiscuity/pregnancy/alcohol/smoking/drug use)
Because it is the way that people think things should be,
1) Goto shcool
2)Graduate
3) goto college
4) get a degree
5) get a job
6) retire
7) die
Somewhere along that list you hope to fall in love have kids, get rich, travel etc etc etc.
But for the most part that is the comonly distrubuted model for success.
How many people do you know when asked what they want to do with their lives respond, be happy? be a good parent? be healthy?
Its typically I want to be rich, or successful or defining what you want to do as an occupation with your life.
What happened to actually watching your kids being responsible for their development and growth, knowing where they are and what they are doing.
Its been replaced by sending them to school, getting a sitter, buying them a television, letting get on the net, paying them money for good behavior, letting them do what they want, and generally ignoring them.
Success= Tangible posetions when compared to your peers?
Sucess= Doing well at your job and being promoted?
Success= owning multiple cars and houses?
For me to define success is a difficult thing, but I know I will not define it by the ballance of my bank account be it large or small, nor by the amount of credit I can utilize, nor by some company promoting me to an arbitrary position on the corporate totem pole. Nor will it be any of the factors that I find ludicrous (at least I pray I wont lose sight and fall prey to the system that I see as a trap)
I think it will be defined by myself my personal satisfaction with my own existance, hopefully my abillity and success in molding and shaping what children I may have into adults who use their minds instead of opting to conform to the mold that is set in place before them.