ah...tis been awhile.
I must not get into much detail, nor do I want to. I haven't been on this thing in roughly 2 years. Wow how things change and it is rather interesting looking back on your life x amount of years ago. I guess you could say i've lost a few great things in the passing of time. I've also gained alot. I've really begun to sort through some shit and figure some stuff out.
I've been busy with school. I've also been busy hanging out with some good friends getting into some rather interesting conversations about life etc. I really needed it, it helps. I got into a slump there for awhile and lost contact with good people and myself for that matter. I really pushed people away. I'm slowly but shurly getting back on my feet and having a good time.
ah...yes, a good time. I've had quite a few recently but, its when I go home that I yet again start to over analyze every situation that occured that day/night and I realize that I really still am rather lost. I analyze way to much and i'm pretty sure it will (in some way or another) be the death of me. Something will come up and i will take way to much time to figure it out and then the possibilities will have passed up. I think i over analyze because I am extremely picky in almost every situation inolving decisions, like girls, etc.
Girls, yes...boy am I picky and I don't know why. Maybe i'm not picky, maybe i've just been hurt. I've realized through the past through my analyzation that whenever one thing is said, one possibly minute statement is made, I really take it to heart. Do I end up the "bad guy" in the end? I guess so. I analyze far to long before I can figure things out with the right amount of time permitted to do so...I've come across a few girls that i'm interested in I guess (probably one or two only cool enough that i'd push myself to get involved) but, i'm not ready nor do I really want to be "ready." With my over analyzing everything, its a good thing. I'm taking my time and it is still far to early to "move on." It was a huge amount of time. You just don't move on, no matter what the circumstances, you need time to reflect and obviously it builds your character as you've learned a lesson or two. I can't just continue to press on. It makes each relationship that passes more and more meaningless.
so after analyzations...am I ready to move on? I suppose to an extent. There will always be interest, every person is interesting. Will i take my time and be even more picky? I assume so. Why is it when i set my mind to something/someone and start to analyze how/what I can do to approach a girl/situation, I fall short and the possibilites again get swept under the rug? I suppose maybe i'm not ready for a relationship in my life even though my mind thinks I am. I get interested in a girl and they never know. I freeze up and my brain starts working and thinking. It doesn't work, it never seems to ever. I give up, even on the relationships I am in. I seem to fall short and give up. When my body and mind is done concentraiting on school, I think if my mind still works this hard, I am going to make one interesting artists, writer because my head is fucked and most this shit never makes it way out into the world. I'm to quite!!!!
How's that for not going into much detail...guess I kinda took off...Blahh......
(inside the current state of mind of Jeff Kalch, brought to you by, Jeff kalch!)
I've been busy with school. I've also been busy hanging out with some good friends getting into some rather interesting conversations about life etc. I really needed it, it helps. I got into a slump there for awhile and lost contact with good people and myself for that matter. I really pushed people away. I'm slowly but shurly getting back on my feet and having a good time.
ah...yes, a good time. I've had quite a few recently but, its when I go home that I yet again start to over analyze every situation that occured that day/night and I realize that I really still am rather lost. I analyze way to much and i'm pretty sure it will (in some way or another) be the death of me. Something will come up and i will take way to much time to figure it out and then the possibilities will have passed up. I think i over analyze because I am extremely picky in almost every situation inolving decisions, like girls, etc.
Girls, yes...boy am I picky and I don't know why. Maybe i'm not picky, maybe i've just been hurt. I've realized through the past through my analyzation that whenever one thing is said, one possibly minute statement is made, I really take it to heart. Do I end up the "bad guy" in the end? I guess so. I analyze far to long before I can figure things out with the right amount of time permitted to do so...I've come across a few girls that i'm interested in I guess (probably one or two only cool enough that i'd push myself to get involved) but, i'm not ready nor do I really want to be "ready." With my over analyzing everything, its a good thing. I'm taking my time and it is still far to early to "move on." It was a huge amount of time. You just don't move on, no matter what the circumstances, you need time to reflect and obviously it builds your character as you've learned a lesson or two. I can't just continue to press on. It makes each relationship that passes more and more meaningless.
so after analyzations...am I ready to move on? I suppose to an extent. There will always be interest, every person is interesting. Will i take my time and be even more picky? I assume so. Why is it when i set my mind to something/someone and start to analyze how/what I can do to approach a girl/situation, I fall short and the possibilites again get swept under the rug? I suppose maybe i'm not ready for a relationship in my life even though my mind thinks I am. I get interested in a girl and they never know. I freeze up and my brain starts working and thinking. It doesn't work, it never seems to ever. I give up, even on the relationships I am in. I seem to fall short and give up. When my body and mind is done concentraiting on school, I think if my mind still works this hard, I am going to make one interesting artists, writer because my head is fucked and most this shit never makes it way out into the world. I'm to quite!!!!
How's that for not going into much detail...guess I kinda took off...Blahh......
(inside the current state of mind of Jeff Kalch, brought to you by, Jeff kalch!)