What Not to Do At Hogwarts.
Title: What Not to Do At Hogwarts
Author: Le Rouge du Sang [aka xhey_mickeyx]
Summary: There are certain rules in place for a reason. These are no different. Learn what you are not allowed to do during your stay at Hogwarts. Follows various characters
Rating: T, just in case I feel like swearing.
Disclaimer: The Harry Potter world is a product of the genius mind of J.K Rowling, who is, sadly, not me. The ideas for this are taken from [586 Things I'm Not Allowed to do at Hogwarts] Check it out. There's some pretty funny shit.
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Number One:"I will not poke Hufflepuffs with spoons, nor will I insist that their House colors indicate that they are "covered in bees."
"Sirius, what are you up to?"
"Remus, be quiet. I don't want them to see me."
"We're in the Great Hall, Padfoot. Everyone can see you," James was sitting at the Gryffindor table while Sirius was attempting to inch his way over to the Hufflepuff table. Remus pulled on Srius's robes in order to pull him back.
"Sirius, stop whatever you're scheming."
"Now see here, Moony. I don't scheme. I merely…formulate a plan."
"That makes it any better?"
"It makes it sound important." Sirius stuck his tongue out at Remus.
Most of the time, second year students at Hogwarts were not so mischievous, but this group of four, the Marauders , were different. They were every professor's idea of Hell.
"Except for Remus, bloody goody-two shoes," Sirius mumbled.
"What was that, Sirius?"
"Nothing. - Hey there, Hufflepuffs. What are you guys up to, nothing too crazy, I hope," Sirius sat down between two girls, putting his hands on their shoulders.
"Hello, Sirius, did you need something," the girl on his left asked, fighting back her giggles.
"Well, now that you mention it… I have been meaning to ask. Your house colours, yellow and black, correct? Does that by any chance refer to the fact that you are covered in bees?"
"W-what?"
Sirius took the spoon she held in her hand, licked the pudding clean off, pointed it at the boy across, and - poked him. Square on the forehead.
"Do. Your. House. Colours. Indicate. That. You. Are. Covered. In. Bees. Also, what the bloody hell is a Hufflepuff?"
"Hey! Look here, Black! If you just came over here with the intention to insult us, just leave!" The boy stood up, shoulders squared ready to pick a fight.
"I would, but I'm afraid you can't do much," Sirius took a spoonful of pudding, but this time flung it at the boy's face.
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"Padfoot, why'd you have to drag us into the food fight?"
"Hey, I didn't bring you into anything -"
"'Oh, Professor, you see, we had a bet going, the four of us. Of who had the best idea to start a food fight,' does that ring a bell?"
"You know Moony, you somehow managed to ruin the lovely atmosphere we had here."
"In the bloody dungeons?"
"Details."
"Okay, that's it! We're going to establish some rules for how we're going to behave. Starting with you, Sirius. First rule, you are not to poke Hufflepuffs with spoons, or ask whether their house colours mean they are covered in bees."
"But that's no fu -"
"SAY IT!"
"Fine, I will not poke Hufflepuffs with spoons, nor will I insist that their house colours indicate that they are covered in bees. But I do believe my other question was pretty important."
"Oh and may I ask what that was?"
"What the hell is a Hufflepuff?"
"Sirius."
"Yes?"
"Shut up."
"Wh -" Remus chucked the tile-cleaning brush at Sirius's mouth.
"That's why."
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Original posted on my Fanfiction.net account: Le Rouge du Sang
Author: Le Rouge du Sang [aka xhey_mickeyx]
Summary: There are certain rules in place for a reason. These are no different. Learn what you are not allowed to do during your stay at Hogwarts. Follows various characters
Rating: T, just in case I feel like swearing.
Disclaimer: The Harry Potter world is a product of the genius mind of J.K Rowling, who is, sadly, not me. The ideas for this are taken from [586 Things I'm Not Allowed to do at Hogwarts] Check it out. There's some pretty funny shit.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Number One:"I will not poke Hufflepuffs with spoons, nor will I insist that their House colors indicate that they are "covered in bees."
"Sirius, what are you up to?"
"Remus, be quiet. I don't want them to see me."
"We're in the Great Hall, Padfoot. Everyone can see you," James was sitting at the Gryffindor table while Sirius was attempting to inch his way over to the Hufflepuff table. Remus pulled on Srius's robes in order to pull him back.
"Sirius, stop whatever you're scheming."
"Now see here, Moony. I don't scheme. I merely…formulate a plan."
"That makes it any better?"
"It makes it sound important." Sirius stuck his tongue out at Remus.
Most of the time, second year students at Hogwarts were not so mischievous, but this group of four, the Marauders , were different. They were every professor's idea of Hell.
"Except for Remus, bloody goody-two shoes," Sirius mumbled.
"What was that, Sirius?"
"Nothing. - Hey there, Hufflepuffs. What are you guys up to, nothing too crazy, I hope," Sirius sat down between two girls, putting his hands on their shoulders.
"Hello, Sirius, did you need something," the girl on his left asked, fighting back her giggles.
"Well, now that you mention it… I have been meaning to ask. Your house colours, yellow and black, correct? Does that by any chance refer to the fact that you are covered in bees?"
"W-what?"
Sirius took the spoon she held in her hand, licked the pudding clean off, pointed it at the boy across, and - poked him. Square on the forehead.
"Do. Your. House. Colours. Indicate. That. You. Are. Covered. In. Bees. Also, what the bloody hell is a Hufflepuff?"
"Hey! Look here, Black! If you just came over here with the intention to insult us, just leave!" The boy stood up, shoulders squared ready to pick a fight.
"I would, but I'm afraid you can't do much," Sirius took a spoonful of pudding, but this time flung it at the boy's face.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Padfoot, why'd you have to drag us into the food fight?"
"Hey, I didn't bring you into anything -"
"'Oh, Professor, you see, we had a bet going, the four of us. Of who had the best idea to start a food fight,' does that ring a bell?"
"You know Moony, you somehow managed to ruin the lovely atmosphere we had here."
"In the bloody dungeons?"
"Details."
"Okay, that's it! We're going to establish some rules for how we're going to behave. Starting with you, Sirius. First rule, you are not to poke Hufflepuffs with spoons, or ask whether their house colours mean they are covered in bees."
"But that's no fu -"
"SAY IT!"
"Fine, I will not poke Hufflepuffs with spoons, nor will I insist that their house colours indicate that they are covered in bees. But I do believe my other question was pretty important."
"Oh and may I ask what that was?"
"What the hell is a Hufflepuff?"
"Sirius."
"Yes?"
"Shut up."
"Wh -" Remus chucked the tile-cleaning brush at Sirius's mouth.
"That's why."
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Original posted on my Fanfiction.net account: Le Rouge du Sang