Dreamwork - Chapter 5
Title: DreamWork
Chapters: 5 / ?
Bands: The GazettE / Some Alice Nine
Genre: AU, Romance, Angst, Hurt, Insanity
Warnings: OOC, Possibly a lot of spelling fuck ups.
Rating: T
Pairings/Characters: Reita/Ruki, Uruha/Aoi, Kai/?
Synopsis: Dreamwork: This is a censoring process by which the dreamer's mind disguises dream content so that sleep is not disturbed by disturbing images.
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Chapter 5 ~ Dim Scene
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“Aimless pain is covering my surroundings completely
I‘m closing my eyes, but enlightening the poem can‘t heal my wounds.”
- Dim Scene
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Previous Chapter - [4]
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Therapy with Linda was tiring, and in all honesty, Ruki was ready to get back to Reita. He wanted to talk to him again, instead of wasting time here, where no one cared.
The hospital ward was dark as he lay back in his bed. Kai was supposed to visit him tomorrow before he left for Paris with Aoi. Uruha was coming too. Ruki felt oddly excited to have a visit from all of them.
His eyes slipped shut and it wasn’t long before he found himself stood outside the small cluster of trees in the forest again. He couldn’t keep the smile off his face as he made his usual way into the meadow. Reita’s eyes flickered up to meet Ruki’s as he heard the rustling of the trees.
“Hey!” He greeted with a smile that set Ruki’s heart on fire. Ruki returned the smile before half running half walking over to the blonde.
“I have an idea.” He voiced before the blonde could speak. Reita quirked one of his eyebrows at his friend. Ruki didn’t bother to explain, but instead ushered for Reita to sit down. They both took their usual places on the grass; cross legged and facing one another.
“So, what’s this ‘plan’ of yours, eh?” Reita asked with a half smirk. Ruki took a breath, giving himself a moment. There was a good chance that he was about to get burnt again, so he had to take this slowly.
“Give me your hand.” He requested calmly. In an instant, Reita went tight lipped and immediately began to inch his way away from the younger male. “Ruki... you know what will happen.”
“I know, but we have to try.” He pleaded. Reita shook his head stubbornly. “At least put out your hand. I’ll just touch it; one finger at a time.” Ruki continued, looking towards Reita, his eyes pleading him to understanding.
“Reita... please.”
The blonde finally raised his hand slowly, a deep frown set into his face. Ruki noted that Reita’s hand was shaking, and for some strange reason he found that cute.
He smiled at Reita, trying to comfort the blonde, before lifting his own hand, his index finger extended, inching its way closer and closer to Reita’s light skin. It looked soft...
Pain; excruciating, bone-splitting pain. Ruki pulled his hand back with a whimper, tears prickling his eyes in both pain and frustration.
Instinctively, Reita reached out, his fingertips brushing over Ruki’s wrist before he realised he was doing more harm than good. Ruki pulled his wrist back, fresh marks steaming angrily on his skin.
“Godammit!” Reita hissed in frustration. Ruki looked up at him as Reita stood up from his spot on the grass. He cradled his wrist with his burnt fingertips as Reita fumed off in the other direction. Ruki could see that he was still shaking, but it wasn’t cute at all this time.
“I knew we shouldn’t have tried! Now look what’s happened!”
Reita was angry, really angry. Ruki could see it in his eyes. He shied away from the blonde and averted his gaze. Yes, it was his fault that his good hand was now crippled, but he wanted to try again. He just knew that Reita wouldn’t agree with him.
“We... We’ll try again tomorrow.” Ruki mumbled over Reita’s heavy breathing. The blonde replied with a diminutive bitter laugh. “So you can burn yourself some more? No.” He replied, waving Ruki’s intentions off.
He wanted to protest. Reita just didn’t understand what Ruki was trying to do. “Reita,” He tried calmly. “Rei, listen to me.”
“No, I’m done listening Ruki. I’m not going to let you touch me anymore. We both know how it’s going to end!” He retorted.
Ruki huffed. Who was Reita to tell him what to do? They’d only know each other a couple of days, and he was already bossing him around. It annoyed Ruki.
“Reita listen to me.”
“No Ruki, stop thinking about it.”
“Reita…”
“No.”
“Reita shut up and listen to me!” Ruki finally exploded, his voice echoed by a long silence. Reita huffed after some time, almost like a infant. If Ruki wasn’t so angry, he would have found it adorable, but he was irritated now. All Reita needed to do was shut up and listen.
“Are you going to listen to me now? Are you finally going to let me speak?” Silence. Reita staying quiet was all the ‘yes’ Ruki needed.
“If I can learn how to touch you, even once, I can start to understand you. Please, just give me a chance.”
Reita was still frowning, but he looked more sad than angry. He almost looked scared, Ruki noted, and the thought made his heart ache.
“Reita I need to do this. If I get hurt… if I die,” He paused here, because Reita had let out what sounded like a whimper. Ruki gave him a small comforting smile before he continued. “If I die, it’ll be my decision. It’ll me my fault, not yours.”
He could feel his throat tightening. He didn’t want to die, but it seemed to be the only way to do this. He needed to touch Reita, he wanted to touch Reita. He was willing to die for that.
“Even if you hurt yourself, but we manage to get over this burning thing,” Reita began to say through gritted teeth. “You’re still going to be left with those scars.” Reita’s voice was strained, as if the thought hurt him. Ruki laughed. “You’re worried of what I might look like afterwards? I’ll still be me.”
“Stop joking around and look at this properly, Ruki!” Another silence, and this time, it was Ruki’s turn to be quiet.
“You’re going to die, and if by some miracle you don’t, you’re going to be scarred for the rest of your life. It may be all well and good while you’re here with me, because I don’t care, but out there, in the real world where you belong, people will talk. They’ll look at you differently. Your life will never be the same.”
“Then I’ll stay here!” Ruki argued. “I’ll stay here with you!”
“And how are you going to do that?” Reita asked, sarcasm dripping from his voice. “You are human. You will wake up eventually, like you always do!”
Ruki could see the tears build up in Reita’s eyes. He saw the first one fall before Reita hid his face and turned his back to Ruki. He needed some time, so Ruki rose from his spot on the grass.
“I’m going for a walk.” He said, his voice quiet. Reita didn’t turn around to look at him. “Where are you going to go?” He replied. His voice was barely a whisper, his throat sounding dry. Ruki shrugged and turned around, eyeing the trees with little to no interest.
“If I wake up while I’m gone, goodbye.” He said without looking back at the blonde. Reita grunted in reply, and Ruki walked towards his usual entrance.
His thinking time was limited. He knew he was going to wake up soon. As he walked away from Reita’s meadow, the air around him became cold. He was in two minds whether to turn around and go back, but he reminded himself that Reita needed time to think as much as he did.
Once Ruki’s mind was made up, it didn’t change. And at this stage, his mind was pretty much made up. If he could find a way to sleep without waking up, that’s what he was going to do. Ruki thought briefly about death, but he soon shook the idea off. If he died, so did Reita.
As he thought, he had stumbled amongst another small cluster of trees; another meadow. It looked exactly like Reita’s meadow, Ruki thought, but it was abandoned. Instead of the flowers, there were angry weeds and nettles and the trees were bare, looking like skeletal hands reaching toward the grey sky.
Ruki scanned the forgotten meadow, his eyes running over the weeds with distaste. He was glad Reita had picked the nice meadow to live in, because it was awfully cold here. Thinking of Reita made Ruki realise just how cold it really was. The air felt like icy water, and it stung to breath. His eyes continued over the trees. They looked dead compared to the lush green leaves on Reita’s trees.
And then Ruki wondered why this place was dead. Why was it abandoned and cold, and more importantly, why did Ruki feel so… sad here. Had it gotten to the point where Reita was the only thing in the world that made him happy? That wasn’t true. As much as Ruki didn’t understand, that was one thing that he knew; Reita wasn’t everything. He had a job that he loved and three amazing best friends that meant the world to him.
Ruki frowned. Reita was right, wasn’t he? Ruki couldn’t sleep forever like he wanted to. He couldn’t leave everything behind for Reita. He had a life. He had friends that needed him, but…
Even with these thoughts buzzing around his mind, he still found himself leaning towards Reita. As much as he loved Uruha, Aoi and Kai, he loved Reita more.
Ruki blinked at his own thoughts. When had love come into this? Did he really just tell himself that he loved Reita? Well, Ruki thought, that certainly was not the case. He felt comfortable around Reita. The air around him was fresher, easier to breath, and the warmth was greater. That didn’t mean he was in love with him… did it?
He blinked in an attempt to clear his suddenly watery eyes, but he was unexpectedly back in the hospital ward again. He’d woken up. He briefly wondered if Reita would be worried or disappointed that he was gone.
Those thoughts were quickly discarded as he raised himself into a seated position. He was in a new room. Had he not suddenly remembered his new burns, he would have inspected the room more.
He raised his wrist to his eyes and examined it closely. He doubted he would be able to hide these marks even if he tried. They looked even more angry and red than his shoulder, and he could see where Reita had tried to cradle his wrist. His fingertips stung, but they weren’t as bad as his wrist.
His eyes left his skin and travelled around his new room. It was big, spacious and it would have been bright had it not been for the rain beating itself against the window. He also noticed that there weren’t any other beds in the room, which meant that it was private. He pulled the covers off himself as his eyes met with a vase of flowers at the end of his bed. They were nice, but they nothing compared to Reita’s flowers. Ruki could hardly smell them.
And then he noticed the white card nestled amongst the dull flowers. He took it and quickly slipped it open, ripping the white, perfect paper in his haste.
“I hope you like the room.
Get comfortable okay? We’ll
visit you before we leave.”
Ruki could recognise Kai’s handwriting anywhere, and he smiled as he set down the card, looking around curiously. It wasn’t long after he had climbed back into bed that there was a quiet, timid knock on the door. Ruki frowned, clearing his throat and fixing his dishevelled black and red hair before calling, “Come in.”
He was pleased to see Kai’s head peek in the door, his eyes scanning the room before finally finding Ruki. He gave one of his wide, dimpled smiles, making Ruki laugh, before he stepped in the door and closed it behind him.
“Good morning, Sleeping Beauty.” Kai said, holding another container in his hand. “I came by earlier but you were asleep.” Ruki smiled. “What time is it?” He asked, curious to know how long he’d slept.
“Past twelve. If you weren’t in the hospital, I’d kill you for waking up so late.” Kai laughed, setting the container down and looking around curiously. “Do you like the new room?” He asked. “I had them move you in here while you were asleep.”
Ruki stared at Kai for a moment, his eyes full of surprise. Why was Kai always taking such good care of him? Was this new surprise because of the whole Paris ordeal?
As if reading his mind, Kai suddenly looked apologetically at his. “Listen Ruki,” He began, his eyes falling back to his hands.
“Kai, it’s fine. It’s okay, don’t worry.” If he was honest, Ruki really did want Kai to explain the confusion around the Paris trip. He did want Kai to tell him why he was not informed about it, but at the same time, he didn’t want an argument to happen. Not now, when Kai was about to leave for a whole month.
“Please let me explain!” Kai pleaded, making his way over to a vacant seat next to his friends new hospital bed. Ruki stayed quiet, curious now to know what Kai wanted to say.
“It was a surprise.” Kai said when he figured he was aloud to go on. “I had your bags packed. I was going to tell you that we needed to go shopping or something, and then bring you to the airport. We would meet up with Uruha and Aoi, and I imagined you looking so happy.” Kai gave a mix between a sigh and a laugh that made Ruki’s heart ache slightly.
He wasted no time and threw the covers off his body, falling into Kai’s arms in a messy hug due to his haste. Kai caught him and chuckled. But this is what Ruki had planned to do before he tripped. He had planned to hug his friend in the most sincere and unadulterated sign of affection he knew.
This was why Kai was his best friend. This was why his heart ached to know that once he found a way to sleep forever, he would never see Kai again.
Tears fell from Ruki’s eyes, but he clung tighter to his precious friend, sobs escaping him. Kai was surprised, but he didn’t question his friend, he only held him tightly listening to the raven muttering ‘thank you’s through his blubbers.
Over and over again.
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AN: I know~ I’m late again. My internet cut out for a week, but here it is!
I hope you enjoyed it and thanks for reading ^-^
Please let me know what you thought~ I’ve been getting less and less comments on these and I’m starting to wonder if anyone’s even reading it anymore LOL
P.S. Aoi and the Real Girl update is on it’s way! :3
Next Chapter - [6]
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