(no subject)
i think i'm going to be alright. definitely more myself lately. tomorrow i see the dentist, the counselor again (it was *weird* the first time), and an eye doctor. maybe i'll get some awesome glasses and have less weirdness at work or at the grocery store or at other places where i'm looking at things way too closely for way too long.
i feel a little sad that people are less willing to like me when i show my super emotional side. but they've stuck around at least and it seems like people still trust me all the same, which is what's really important to me. i might have a lot of friends but nothing compares to the kind of friend you feel okay with telling absolutely anything to.
i'm going to try to stop beating myself up over past relationships as much as i have. i know that doesn't mean getting over them. i just dont seem to do that. but that's okay. i'd rather actually feel the cuts and bruises that come along with life than callous up and become numb, or jump from relationship to relationship to avoid feeling things out. it's a conscious decision i made for myself a long time ago, and i realized that it would come along with a lot of pain. but life is so short. it's not worth hiding from it. this is finally really me talking.
i feel a little sad that people are less willing to like me when i show my super emotional side. but they've stuck around at least and it seems like people still trust me all the same, which is what's really important to me. i might have a lot of friends but nothing compares to the kind of friend you feel okay with telling absolutely anything to.
i'm going to try to stop beating myself up over past relationships as much as i have. i know that doesn't mean getting over them. i just dont seem to do that. but that's okay. i'd rather actually feel the cuts and bruises that come along with life than callous up and become numb, or jump from relationship to relationship to avoid feeling things out. it's a conscious decision i made for myself a long time ago, and i realized that it would come along with a lot of pain. but life is so short. it's not worth hiding from it. this is finally really me talking.