community college drop out
It's important not to post too often. I didn't forget about you livejournal. I just needed a break.
uhhhh where do I even start? well, I'm crazy stressed out. I'm going to fail my weigh in next week. The Navy has weight standards that I do not currently meet. I'm usually worried this time of year as I have always been close to my max weight.... but I never failed before... okay, I failed once, by a POUND... and I didn't even care... I was just like whatever... I don't care put me on the fat people work out program..i'll get out of work for an hour every other day. That was 4 and a half years ago... Anyway, like I said...i've always been close...1 or 2 lbs to lose in an afternoon.. whatever.. I'd go run in sweats and a garbage bag and sweat it off.. this is a little different... i'm close to 30 lbs over my max weight. I can't run that off tomorrow... i'm going to fail. ughh its this fucking schedule. My metabolism sucks sooooooooo bad. I eat ONCE a day..I probably only take in a max of 800 calories a day, fuck... I don't even drink anymore. ... anyway this is bad.. This command doesn't fuck around when it comes to kicking people out for being fat..
I dont know what the new rules are... I know it USE to be 3 failures in 4 years you are kicked out with a medical discharge. Every thing is different know.. they don't want to retain people anymore.. you can sneeze wrong and get out.. It use to be hard to get out.. this was not a job you could just quit.. they owned you! Now if you want out you can pretty much just ask and fill out a little bit of paperwork and they will gladly put you out on your ass. No questions asked. anyway... i'm going to fail, its going to go on my record and I will have to work out with the fat club every morning when I get off work 4 days a week. Thats fine.. Its not the work out that i'm afraid of... I feel like this weight is not going to come off....I don't know why... I just I feel like 30 lbs is just TOO much.. like im too far gone and i'll never make it. Nyles had weigh ins this week... he's always close too... all he has to do is not drink for a week and he'll lose 15lbs. Its not fair.. don't get me wrong... I'm glad he can do that... i'm just jealous.
How did I let this happen? having a baby didn't help...poor diet and not exercising will do it I guess..
i'm sooooo scared that i'm not going to be able to drop the weight and that I will get kicked out. that CAN'T happen. i'm in up to debt to my eyeballs and I can not afford to not have a job. Yeah, I could probably get some crappy ass job as a cashier... or something horrible... but they don't make any money. I figured out that Nyles and I combined make about 100,000 a year... thats not a lot... but its not horrible for two community college drop outs. Yeah, being in the military can really suck sometimes.. but a pay check on the 1st and the 15th of every month makes it a little less shitty...
I guess I just have to suck it up... I should get one of those running strollers... but they are expensive.. and who knows... I may not have a job this time next year.
So I got my absentee ballot in the mail recently. I'm still registered in Pinellas county.. now mailbox is getting bombarded with political advertisements... even stuff thanking me for my service. I'm a registered democrat and i've always voted democrat... I never talk about politics. It's just ugly and no one is ever right... So I usually walk away or change the subject...but this is livejournal and there is no one here to argue with me, so i'll briefly mention it here. So when President Bush was president being in the military was a sure thing.. people didn't get kicked out or forced retired, you didn't have to stand in a room with a board and get drilled with questions to determine if you should be able to keep your job. They were even a lot more lenient when it came to weight standards. We use to get re-enlistment bonuses, there was no, perform to serve approval that you had to submit. You use to be encouraged to re enlist. We even use to get a raise every year! It was nice... but the rest of the economy sucked...Billions was being spent on defense! We were in the ship yard for 9 months...Price tag when were finally out... 9 million dollars. That Is just ONE boat. I remember ordering parts for maintenance. 10 dollars for one SCREW. ONE. and say I needed 50....and thats just one item... gaskets, filters...everything...that I needed was at my fingertips... i'd spend thousands of dollars on stuff that shouldn't of cost more than 100 dollars... Who ever is getting these parts contracts is making so much money its sick. The government knows this happens.... they have to. They just don't care. When president Obama became president everything changed.. He wants a" a smaller leaner military" For a while they were going to cut paychecks...and just NOT pay us... that was pretty scary... I do agree that defense spending should be cut.. but I wish they'd actually look at it and cut it where it needs to be cut. When Clinton was president this economy was great and defense was practically no existent. Thats probably not a coincidence. Mitt Romney is a douchebag... sorry I cant vote for him.. He's too fake...
yes, i'd probably get to keep my job in the long run if he were president...But I care more about the economy, education and healthcare than I do about defense.. I've seen what we do. Its a fucking joke. we spend hundreds of thousands of dollars per boat in fuel... to go out and practice being at war....10 dollars for a fucking screw, 20 dollars for a piece of rubber...it adds up. anyway... honestly I don't like obama or romney. This is dumb.. i'm done talking about this.
I've been obsessed with Volkswagen for the past few weeks. I'm obsessed with getting this bug looking good. I really thought it would be a fun and fairly inexpensive project that Nyles and I could do together. The car itself was cheap enough. I budgeted about $1000 for paint and body. NOPE. maaco quoted me $4000 dollars. THEY ARE INSANE! the car...would MAYBE be worth $4000 If it were in perfect condition.. like interior and everything...ughhh. I went to another shop.. a small place down the street from me.. $4500 and it would take 4 months to do. I don't want a show car or anything. fuck... I just want it to look nice. So I took it back to the guy I bought it from because he said he does stuff like that... He told me$ 1300 and he'd get a set of bumbers and running boards put on it. Its probably going to look like shit.. well.. it cant look any worse than it does right now.. it really is pretty rough...I just don't know if I want to spend 1300 and feel like it was a waste. The whole purpose in getting this car to be able to drive it to work and save a ton of money in fuel.. the car would of paid for itself...
It really does run great though... sometimes the engine floods and I have to wait a little before I care start it again.. but other than that its great. I cant get the car to go above 45mph....I dont know if thats all bugs or just mine... and if thats the case I cant drive it to work... I wont get up the on ramp... its seriously 0 to 45 in about 5 minutes... it soooooooo slooowwww. It doesn't feel like it though... I thought maybe the speedo was messed up but I had Nyles follow me and he confirmed it wasn't fucked up. ughhh...I need to put my 'engineman' skills to use I guess.
so... I've gotta call 'Buddy' The old hippie meth head guy that I bought the car off of on the 15th and set something up to get the car started with body work and paint.. I really hope I'm not making another mistake... he's a nice guy... he's just seriously old and run through... He didn't recognize me when I came back to talk to him about paint... to be fair I was in uniform when I bought the car..
I'm so obsessed about doing this car that I finally cleaned out the 'garage' that I have referred to as the barn for the year that i've lived in the house. Its a detached garage that is really a gigantic shed.. if were painted red it would look like a barn. its got two floors and a ladder going up to the second floor that I don't trust. It was filled with so much shit for the people that lived there before us.. there was a shopping cart in there for god sakes. there was tires, boxes and boxes of stuffed animal that rats chewed...a stove, so many empty cardboard boxes, straight up trash, rat shit, a toilet, just everything that the last people said fuck it to and left there... my landlord also said fuck it and didnt want to deal with it.... I really didnt either... I was too scared to go in there.. it was sooo dirty and dark... you couldnt even walk. My mom has seriously been driving me nuts about cleaning it out....FINALLY i agreed and we went all out... its a useable space now. there were sooooo many spiders!! it was awful... I didn't sleep well that night because of it. I wish I would of taken a before picture.... I hung up my volkswagen flag and now its my Beetle garage! where i'll install new headlights and tail lights, change out the carpet, headliner.. trim... change the oil.... everything.....maybe figure out why I cant go faster than 45.
alright october, this is long enough... It was good talking to you..maybe i'll see you later in the month.
uhhhh where do I even start? well, I'm crazy stressed out. I'm going to fail my weigh in next week. The Navy has weight standards that I do not currently meet. I'm usually worried this time of year as I have always been close to my max weight.... but I never failed before... okay, I failed once, by a POUND... and I didn't even care... I was just like whatever... I don't care put me on the fat people work out program..i'll get out of work for an hour every other day. That was 4 and a half years ago... Anyway, like I said...i've always been close...1 or 2 lbs to lose in an afternoon.. whatever.. I'd go run in sweats and a garbage bag and sweat it off.. this is a little different... i'm close to 30 lbs over my max weight. I can't run that off tomorrow... i'm going to fail. ughh its this fucking schedule. My metabolism sucks sooooooooo bad. I eat ONCE a day..I probably only take in a max of 800 calories a day, fuck... I don't even drink anymore. ... anyway this is bad.. This command doesn't fuck around when it comes to kicking people out for being fat..
I dont know what the new rules are... I know it USE to be 3 failures in 4 years you are kicked out with a medical discharge. Every thing is different know.. they don't want to retain people anymore.. you can sneeze wrong and get out.. It use to be hard to get out.. this was not a job you could just quit.. they owned you! Now if you want out you can pretty much just ask and fill out a little bit of paperwork and they will gladly put you out on your ass. No questions asked. anyway... i'm going to fail, its going to go on my record and I will have to work out with the fat club every morning when I get off work 4 days a week. Thats fine.. Its not the work out that i'm afraid of... I feel like this weight is not going to come off....I don't know why... I just I feel like 30 lbs is just TOO much.. like im too far gone and i'll never make it. Nyles had weigh ins this week... he's always close too... all he has to do is not drink for a week and he'll lose 15lbs. Its not fair.. don't get me wrong... I'm glad he can do that... i'm just jealous.
How did I let this happen? having a baby didn't help...poor diet and not exercising will do it I guess..
i'm sooooo scared that i'm not going to be able to drop the weight and that I will get kicked out. that CAN'T happen. i'm in up to debt to my eyeballs and I can not afford to not have a job. Yeah, I could probably get some crappy ass job as a cashier... or something horrible... but they don't make any money. I figured out that Nyles and I combined make about 100,000 a year... thats not a lot... but its not horrible for two community college drop outs. Yeah, being in the military can really suck sometimes.. but a pay check on the 1st and the 15th of every month makes it a little less shitty...
I guess I just have to suck it up... I should get one of those running strollers... but they are expensive.. and who knows... I may not have a job this time next year.
So I got my absentee ballot in the mail recently. I'm still registered in Pinellas county.. now mailbox is getting bombarded with political advertisements... even stuff thanking me for my service. I'm a registered democrat and i've always voted democrat... I never talk about politics. It's just ugly and no one is ever right... So I usually walk away or change the subject...but this is livejournal and there is no one here to argue with me, so i'll briefly mention it here. So when President Bush was president being in the military was a sure thing.. people didn't get kicked out or forced retired, you didn't have to stand in a room with a board and get drilled with questions to determine if you should be able to keep your job. They were even a lot more lenient when it came to weight standards. We use to get re-enlistment bonuses, there was no, perform to serve approval that you had to submit. You use to be encouraged to re enlist. We even use to get a raise every year! It was nice... but the rest of the economy sucked...Billions was being spent on defense! We were in the ship yard for 9 months...Price tag when were finally out... 9 million dollars. That Is just ONE boat. I remember ordering parts for maintenance. 10 dollars for one SCREW. ONE. and say I needed 50....and thats just one item... gaskets, filters...everything...that I needed was at my fingertips... i'd spend thousands of dollars on stuff that shouldn't of cost more than 100 dollars... Who ever is getting these parts contracts is making so much money its sick. The government knows this happens.... they have to. They just don't care. When president Obama became president everything changed.. He wants a" a smaller leaner military" For a while they were going to cut paychecks...and just NOT pay us... that was pretty scary... I do agree that defense spending should be cut.. but I wish they'd actually look at it and cut it where it needs to be cut. When Clinton was president this economy was great and defense was practically no existent. Thats probably not a coincidence. Mitt Romney is a douchebag... sorry I cant vote for him.. He's too fake...
yes, i'd probably get to keep my job in the long run if he were president...But I care more about the economy, education and healthcare than I do about defense.. I've seen what we do. Its a fucking joke. we spend hundreds of thousands of dollars per boat in fuel... to go out and practice being at war....10 dollars for a fucking screw, 20 dollars for a piece of rubber...it adds up. anyway... honestly I don't like obama or romney. This is dumb.. i'm done talking about this.
I've been obsessed with Volkswagen for the past few weeks. I'm obsessed with getting this bug looking good. I really thought it would be a fun and fairly inexpensive project that Nyles and I could do together. The car itself was cheap enough. I budgeted about $1000 for paint and body. NOPE. maaco quoted me $4000 dollars. THEY ARE INSANE! the car...would MAYBE be worth $4000 If it were in perfect condition.. like interior and everything...ughhh. I went to another shop.. a small place down the street from me.. $4500 and it would take 4 months to do. I don't want a show car or anything. fuck... I just want it to look nice. So I took it back to the guy I bought it from because he said he does stuff like that... He told me$ 1300 and he'd get a set of bumbers and running boards put on it. Its probably going to look like shit.. well.. it cant look any worse than it does right now.. it really is pretty rough...I just don't know if I want to spend 1300 and feel like it was a waste. The whole purpose in getting this car to be able to drive it to work and save a ton of money in fuel.. the car would of paid for itself...
It really does run great though... sometimes the engine floods and I have to wait a little before I care start it again.. but other than that its great. I cant get the car to go above 45mph....I dont know if thats all bugs or just mine... and if thats the case I cant drive it to work... I wont get up the on ramp... its seriously 0 to 45 in about 5 minutes... it soooooooo slooowwww. It doesn't feel like it though... I thought maybe the speedo was messed up but I had Nyles follow me and he confirmed it wasn't fucked up. ughhh...I need to put my 'engineman' skills to use I guess.
so... I've gotta call 'Buddy' The old hippie meth head guy that I bought the car off of on the 15th and set something up to get the car started with body work and paint.. I really hope I'm not making another mistake... he's a nice guy... he's just seriously old and run through... He didn't recognize me when I came back to talk to him about paint... to be fair I was in uniform when I bought the car..
I'm so obsessed about doing this car that I finally cleaned out the 'garage' that I have referred to as the barn for the year that i've lived in the house. Its a detached garage that is really a gigantic shed.. if were painted red it would look like a barn. its got two floors and a ladder going up to the second floor that I don't trust. It was filled with so much shit for the people that lived there before us.. there was a shopping cart in there for god sakes. there was tires, boxes and boxes of stuffed animal that rats chewed...a stove, so many empty cardboard boxes, straight up trash, rat shit, a toilet, just everything that the last people said fuck it to and left there... my landlord also said fuck it and didnt want to deal with it.... I really didnt either... I was too scared to go in there.. it was sooo dirty and dark... you couldnt even walk. My mom has seriously been driving me nuts about cleaning it out....FINALLY i agreed and we went all out... its a useable space now. there were sooooo many spiders!! it was awful... I didn't sleep well that night because of it. I wish I would of taken a before picture.... I hung up my volkswagen flag and now its my Beetle garage! where i'll install new headlights and tail lights, change out the carpet, headliner.. trim... change the oil.... everything.....maybe figure out why I cant go faster than 45.
alright october, this is long enough... It was good talking to you..maybe i'll see you later in the month.