I Can't Believe I Almost Killed Myself....
...Surprised to hear from me?
Oct. 31st...probably not the best day for me. Adding the previous cuts to the ones I added that day, I had at least 400 cuts on my arms. I was admitted to a adolescent ward at a hospital in Dyer, and I stayed there until this morning. I was one of the "suicidal" patients, so they kept a close eye on me... They did a blood test on me, and the Doctor didn't hold anything back from me. He told me the truth, and...everyone knows, the truth can be scary. His exact words were, "with the amount of Valiums you took, you should be dead right now.." Hearing that really tore my heart apart. I wasn't even thinking when I was doing all that stuff to myself. The experience though...wow. It's something I'm never going to forget. They made me realize so many things. That deep down I am a good person. People care about me. I should never think negatively about myself, and there are others out there just like me... That cry at night because they are in so much pain on the inside, and they just can't stop it. I'm so thankful that I got to go to the hospital. I met a few amazing people I know I'll never forget.
I apologize to anyone who worried about me, cried over me, or even had to think about losing me forever.... I was being so selfish, and...I'm sorry. I just hit a point where I couldn't take anything anymore... So much was happening at once, and I wasn't thinking. I'm so glad I'm still alive, and that people love me... I love you all...and I just want everyone to know I'm happy now... :-D <---See? Anyways... I'll be in school Tuesday... Hopefully I'm not TOO far behind...
Well, hugs and kisses to my friends and family....
Love ALWAYS and forever...
Natalie Jean Prskalo
Oct. 31st...probably not the best day for me. Adding the previous cuts to the ones I added that day, I had at least 400 cuts on my arms. I was admitted to a adolescent ward at a hospital in Dyer, and I stayed there until this morning. I was one of the "suicidal" patients, so they kept a close eye on me... They did a blood test on me, and the Doctor didn't hold anything back from me. He told me the truth, and...everyone knows, the truth can be scary. His exact words were, "with the amount of Valiums you took, you should be dead right now.." Hearing that really tore my heart apart. I wasn't even thinking when I was doing all that stuff to myself. The experience though...wow. It's something I'm never going to forget. They made me realize so many things. That deep down I am a good person. People care about me. I should never think negatively about myself, and there are others out there just like me... That cry at night because they are in so much pain on the inside, and they just can't stop it. I'm so thankful that I got to go to the hospital. I met a few amazing people I know I'll never forget.
I apologize to anyone who worried about me, cried over me, or even had to think about losing me forever.... I was being so selfish, and...I'm sorry. I just hit a point where I couldn't take anything anymore... So much was happening at once, and I wasn't thinking. I'm so glad I'm still alive, and that people love me... I love you all...and I just want everyone to know I'm happy now... :-D <---See? Anyways... I'll be in school Tuesday... Hopefully I'm not TOO far behind...
Well, hugs and kisses to my friends and family....
Love ALWAYS and forever...
Natalie Jean Prskalo