Story 233: "Ad Vitam Aeternam" by Foxsong
Happy Halloween! For a show about things that go bump in the night, this fandom is surprisingly short of genuinely scary stories. They must be hard to write, or at least write well. This isn't exactly a ghost story, but it's plenty disturbing all the same
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1. It's dated. Yeah, I know it's frustrating when you write something while a show is airing and a few months down the line, pooof, your story is kicked out of canon and into the obsolete ditch. I got a few like those. Sadly, Scully having a girl is not canon, so as I was reading my brain went "wait, what? A girl?"
Well, I can't fault the writer for that. Most of what we read here is "dated," in that sense. I try judge the story on whether or not it works. The canon is closed now but it wasn't when people were writing 99% of these fics.
2. I don't find Mulder as a green blooded clone wildly original (says the woman with the clone fetish).
I've only read one other Mulder clone story. Is there a list somewhere?
3. I LOVE streamlined fics, but this one could have done with a little fleshing out. It jumps from Scully explaining she and a returned Mulder spent "two years in the sun" which I assumed meant, they had moved some place quiet to raise their kid. And then a couple of paragraphs later, you find out that they were still working in dangerous positions enough to get Mulder shot and killed. It would have been nice to have a couple of transition lines to make that fact not just appear out of the blue. Ellipsis can be a double edge sword, it can either improve your story flow or wreck it when your reader goes "Wait, whut?"
I think the the phrase "two years in the sun" is supposed to allude to an idiomatic phrase, "day in the sun" or "moment in the sun," as prufrock used it in her story by that name. If you get your "day in the sun," you get attention, you get appreciated. Two years of happiness is more than she'd ever hoped for.
I'd love to see this story fleshed out. Mulder living a life with his child and with Scully, dying as described. Maybe he wasn't in the field that whole time, maybe he was working a desk job profilng and went out just that once to work a case and bam! That story could be brilliant.
4. Remember what the green toxic retrovirus did to Mulder in S2? Yeah, apparently nobody does. Scully breathing them should have sent her straight to the hospital, not waiting for the fumes to be "too much" and waiting to hear his last words with itching eyes. This ain't alien onions.
The series was very inconsistent about the green goo. I think Mulder's fear is supposed to convey how toxic he thinks he will be to Scully.
5. Scully stopping to look for Mulder because she has a child that looks and behaves like him? Sorry, I'm not buying it. it would give my Scully renewed determination to find him, not give up. These are the people who went to opposite poles to save each other. I think kids as the panacea for loss is a flawed concept, but what do I know?
The story is a little inconsistent about that, too. It starts out with her saying, "It troubled her for a long time afterward that she had not heard his last words to her." But it ends with her saying that she did understand that he was really gone this time. But it doesn't explain why she came to that conclusion.
6. I don't think Maggie Scully would be so oblivious of her daughter's grief to go on and on about Mulder.
Everyone is different in their response to grief. For me, talking about the person who has died is helpful. Scully doesn't sound disturbed by Maggie to me. She just tunes her mother out.
HOWEVER, this story has some really nice moments too. I found it heartbreaking that Scully would think that two year of happiness was enough, like she knew her life would not be able to grant her more. And okay, even if I don't buy it, watching Scully stop fighting, accept Mulder's loss and finding solace in her child gave the story a nice sense of closure.
That was very poignant, wasn't it? Scully deciding to accept that Mulder was truly gone was one possible ending to the series. I think him coming back as a hybrid fit the mythology better than having him dug up from a grave and "cured" from being a supersoldier with a course of anti-virals. Oh show.
So this one was hit and miss IMO, but thanks for rec'ing it.
You're welcome!
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I so appreciate your commenting, even though you have mixed feelings about it. Most people won't.
I find that there are more things to discuss if a story has flaws than if the story is perfect (if there is such a thing). I guess my inner beta never shuts up. *g*
Well, I can't fault the writer for that. Most of what we read here is "dated," in that sense. I try judge the story on whether or not it works. The canon is closed now but it wasn't when people were writing 99% of these fics.
Oh definetely. I was just pointing out the things that pulled me out of the story flow. I know it can't be helped.
I've only read one other Mulder clone story. Is there a list somewhere?
Was that All the Mulders? I don't know of any list, but it seems to me there's been a few of them around. Ok, I've just checked Haven. Donna has written two apparently - True Family and Simple Choices. Then there's The Coriolus Effect by Zuffy. The Other Man by Jess M. which I seem to recall we discussed here and Any Other Name by Louise Marin. I haven't read any of these apart from The Other Man, though I can roughly guess which one are good and which one ain't. *g*
If you get your "day in the sun," you get attention, you get appreciated. Two years of happiness is more than she'd ever hoped for.
Ah, thank you for this! Pesky foreign idioms! ;-)
I'd love to see this story fleshed out. Mulder living a life with his child and with Scully, dying as described. Maybe he wasn't in the field that whole time, maybe he was working a desk job profilng and went out just that once to work a case and bam! That story could be brilliant.
I know right? I was reading something yesterday ( well attempted to read, was patient for a whole 10 paragraphs, then I followed the advice of....damn, can't remember who said it - that in doubt they always skipped to the smut if there was any and if that was bad then there was little chance they would enjoy the rest of the story. Which makes a lot of sense considering smut is a bloody nightmare to write and only talented writers can really pull it off. Anyway, the sex scenes were really bad, so I gave up with no regret.) the story was 50 000 words long and IMO it would have been better if the author had trimmed 70% of it. But in this case I think the story would have greatly benefited with being longer, if only to anchor emotional hooks with the reader, because this fic didn't really give me any time to get involved with its characters and I guess this is why I may have had this "meh" reaction when Mulder turned out to be a clone. I hadn't been "tuned" by the writer to care enough for this incarnation of him.
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The series was very inconsistent about the green goo. I think Mulder's fear is supposed to convey how toxic he thinks he will be to Scully.
Yeah, I know, but she still breathes the fumes and seems all right, which doesn't match Mulder's mad panic. This could have done with some work. I'd have been happy with a line saying she had to check in with the hospital, or that whatever experiments she endured gave her a resistance or immunity. It was an easy fix. This is just sloppy.
The story is a little inconsistent about that, too. It starts out with her saying, "It troubled her for a long time afterward that she had not heard his last words to her." But it ends with her saying that she did understand that he was really gone this time. But it doesn't explain why she came to that conclusion.
Agreed. This story could have been great if more work had been spent on it. It feels a bit like it's been rushed.
Everyone is different in their response to grief. For me, talking about the person who has died is helpful. Scully doesn't sound disturbed by Maggie to me. She just tunes her mother out.
Hmm, you have a point. Has anybody ever written anything from the POV of Maggie Scully, do you know?
Scully deciding to accept that Mulder was truly gone was one possible ending to the series. I think him coming back as a hybrid fit the mythology better than having him dug up from a grave and "cured" from being a supersoldier with a course of anti-virals. Oh show.
IKR? It sounds even worse when you spell it out. What Drugs Were They On? *laughs*
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