(no subject)
i am SO ready to get the fuck out of here. boston's feeling so claustrophobia-inducing lately. everything's so tense-- i keep fighting with my family, school just won't fucking end-- it's just time for me to go. i know i'll go through the ritual sadness of leaving things and people behind, but i now know that i really do need to leave. there's too much holding me back here. i am so sure that once i'm in a new setting, away from the people and places i see every day, i'll be able to really live. if that sounds mean, it's not supposed to. i'm not mad at anyone in particular, except maybe my mother and a handful of members of the male gender, but i really can't go on surrounded by latin kids and stop and shop kids and waltham kids anymore. it's making me crazy, QUITE literally. and angry. and the anger scares me. i don't ever want to scream at my mother again. it's awful. being in this house with her and my father is not healthy. god i wish they had gotten divorced. ugh i'm ranting... i'm gonna go. do something productive, rather than destructive. my room will never be the same.