forced to think that hell is a place called home
everything is dead to me right about now. i cant sleep at night and i sleep too much during the day. Im never home and i dont go out anymore. I hate being at home. My daily routine is waking up, my parents fighting, going to school to deal with the bullshit there, coming home to my dad drunk before noon, go to work and deal with the people there, come home and be bitched at by my mom. Im sick of everything. i have no one to talk to, and i feel like im losing it. ive gone to bed in hysterics the last month. i feel like devins the only person who wants to hang out with me.. and im just the girl who no one wants to be around, probably because im always with devin. I feel like i dont fit in with anyone, i cant talk to any one and no one even wants to talk to me.
Im sick of being the only realistic person in my house. I hate being alone all the time. I hate coming home to a fucking junk house with parents who only care about me because im their responsibility. The only thing my parents seem to notice about me is my faults or when i want to go out. and im barely allowed to do that. im 17 for shits sake. My mom just bitches about everything around her, including me. My dad is just drunk all the time and is an idiot. I hate being home, my mom doesnt realize im a teenager. I see everyone elses parents letting them go to tahoe, telling them theyre gettting drunk and actually being able to have people over without their parents judging all of their friends. I just wish i was someone else.
I've pushed all my friends away when i found a guy that truely cared about me and for the most part hasnt fucked me over, but even that has its flaws.
I want to get away from everything and sometimes i wish i didnt wake up in the morning.
fuck this.
Im sick of being the only realistic person in my house. I hate being alone all the time. I hate coming home to a fucking junk house with parents who only care about me because im their responsibility. The only thing my parents seem to notice about me is my faults or when i want to go out. and im barely allowed to do that. im 17 for shits sake. My mom just bitches about everything around her, including me. My dad is just drunk all the time and is an idiot. I hate being home, my mom doesnt realize im a teenager. I see everyone elses parents letting them go to tahoe, telling them theyre gettting drunk and actually being able to have people over without their parents judging all of their friends. I just wish i was someone else.
I've pushed all my friends away when i found a guy that truely cared about me and for the most part hasnt fucked me over, but even that has its flaws.
I want to get away from everything and sometimes i wish i didnt wake up in the morning.
fuck this.