And then some jokes...
This lorry driver sat eating his egg and chips in a transport cafe, when ten Hells Angels walked in.
They walked up to the lorry driver, started eating his dinner and drinking his tea.
The lorry driver just stood up and walked out. The Hells Angel leader walked up to the counter and sticking his chest out said, "He wasn't much of a man was he?"
"No" said the cafe manager, "he wasn't much of a lorry driver either, he's just reversed over ten motorbikes!"
An elderly woman who lived on the third floor of an apartment house broke her leg. When the doctor put a cast on it, he warned her not to climb any stairs until the cast was off. Three months later, she went back to the doctor and he removed the cast.
"Can I climb the stairs now?" she asked him.
"Yes, you should be fine now." He replied.
"Thank goodness!" she exclaimed. "I sure am tired of shinnying up and down that drain pipe."
A tough old redneck counseled his grandson that if he wanted to live a long life, the secret was to sprinkle a pinch of gun powder on his oatmeal every morning. The grandson did this religiously to the age of 103.
When he died, he left 14 children, 30 grand-children, 45 great grandchildren, 25 great-great grand children, and a 15 foot hole in the ground where the crematorium used to be.
They walked up to the lorry driver, started eating his dinner and drinking his tea.
The lorry driver just stood up and walked out. The Hells Angel leader walked up to the counter and sticking his chest out said, "He wasn't much of a man was he?"
"No" said the cafe manager, "he wasn't much of a lorry driver either, he's just reversed over ten motorbikes!"
An elderly woman who lived on the third floor of an apartment house broke her leg. When the doctor put a cast on it, he warned her not to climb any stairs until the cast was off. Three months later, she went back to the doctor and he removed the cast.
"Can I climb the stairs now?" she asked him.
"Yes, you should be fine now." He replied.
"Thank goodness!" she exclaimed. "I sure am tired of shinnying up and down that drain pipe."
A tough old redneck counseled his grandson that if he wanted to live a long life, the secret was to sprinkle a pinch of gun powder on his oatmeal every morning. The grandson did this religiously to the age of 103.
When he died, he left 14 children, 30 grand-children, 45 great grandchildren, 25 great-great grand children, and a 15 foot hole in the ground where the crematorium used to be.