All About Alex [1/1]
All About Alex
Casey/Ellie AU in which Ellie gets the Intersect and Devon isn't around.
Set during 'Chuck vs the Tic Tac' and after-wards
PG plus; some sexual content
So, three years ago I accidentally read an e-mail meant for Chuck and got the Intersect in my head. Soon after, Sarah and John came to look after me and help me. I've known almost from the start that both Sarah and John have secrets. Some of them they can probably never tell me. I understand that. But I know John; he's as reliable as rock. Possibly more so!
In the last three years, John's been there at my back and by my side; protecting, cajoling, unbending and deadly towards the bad guys. John supported me early on when Devon couldn't cope with the new encyclopedia of the Intersect in my brain and me having to go off at odd times of day and night. When Devon left, John held me, wiped my tears and provided moral support. Slowly, almost imperceptively, I've fallen in love with him. I've noticed every time when there have been flashes of tenderness in his eyes or in the tone of his voice.
I know a sexual or romantic relationship between asset and handler is - well, not exactly forbidden - but it is frowned upon. We aren't supposed to cross the line between business and pleasure. Emotions can cloud the issue, that's for sure. I know that from being a doctor. So I've said nothing.
Then came the day recently when Casey went on the run. It looked like he was working for the Ring. I refused to believe it. Unless he was a double agent. It was inconceivable that he could betray everything he stood for. So Sarah and I went after him. By that time, I'd found out that John wasn't his real name.
As he said to me, “I'm not John Casey.”
I protested, “I don't care what your name really is; I know you.”
His eyes flashed briefly. That meant something to him.
Then he told us about Kathleen, his fiancee twenty odd years ago, “She was the love of my life.”
I bit back a gasp of pain. The last crumb of hope I held that something - anything - romantic or sexual could happen between John and me died. I felt the pain deep within. It was as though my heart had broken into a million tiny painful pieces. I had to pretend to fiddle with my gear. This was worse - far worse - than when Devon left me.
Then I met Kathleen, albeit briefly. She was somewhere about the same age as John, slim, lovely and dark-haired. Maybe that was it; maybe John found me at least attractive because I reminded him a little of her. Or he just preferred brunettes, who knows. I was just about dealing with the revelation of lovely Kathleen when her nineteen year old daughter ran in. Her daughter called Alex. John was stunned, shocked. I could see it in his eyes. He had no idea until she appeared that he was a father. I tried to talk to him, but he'd shut down, disassociated.
We went back to the Castle. General Beckman was there. She took action against John's treason. I tried to protest, but John shook his head, his jaw set firm.
“No, Ellie. I did this.”
“But you were trying to save the life of your fiancee,” I turned to Bekman, “Doesn't that count for anything?”
Beckman looked at me, “Eleanor Bartowski; I understand Colonel Casey's motives, believe me. But that does not negate his actions, the actions of a serving agent and ex-serviceman. For that, I must do this.”
She was right, as far as military law was concerned. But it hurt so deeply to see John standing so stiffly, holding in his pain and all the other emotions by a hair. His demotion to plain civilian hurt deeply; almost broke him. I could tell that just by looking at him. Then came the forced moved out of his condo. The team even knocked over his beloved bonsai. It was positively heartbreaking. I managed to salvage a number of items whilst the team were working. Morgan and Chuck helped me; getting as much as possible over to John's new smaller place before the salvage team got their hands on it.
Later, John was sitting in what passed for his new lving room. He barely noticed as we smuggled furniture and other things into the place. I'd repotted the bonsai and it sat on his tiny new coffee table. John seemed to be staring at it.
I put my hand on his shoulder, “John; you could go to Kathleen and your daughter now.”
“Huh,” he rose to his feet, “No going back, Ellie.”
“John, I lost my Dad for several years. I would have given almost anything to have him back for one day. Surely your daughter deserves a chance to know her father?”
His jaw tensed, “No. It would place them at danger, especially with The Ring being around.”
He was right and I knew it.
I nodded and turned away. Suddenly I felt tears coming. John folded me in his arms.
“Hey, 's'okay. I'll be fine.”
I wasn't only crying for him, but I didn't say anything.
“It's been a tough day today.”
John grunted softly, “I know.”
He tucked me under his chin. I suddenly found myself trembling and shaking with delayed shock.
He grunted softly and tenderly, “Hey. You shouldn't be alone tonight.”
I wiped my face with my hand, “I should be saying that to you!”
He offered me his handkercheif, “Well, maybe so. After all the upheaval today, maybe we both need a friend. Thank-you for rescuing my bed and other things. Tonight, we will share it.”
I looked up at him in surprise, “John?”
He held my chin, “For human company, nothing more. And just tonight, okay?”
Well, I'd dreamed often enough about sharing his bed. And one night was better than never.
I nodded, “Yes.”
So, we shared a drink of whisky and went upstairs. John loaned me a spare toothbrush and then found a comb for my hair.
“Sit down, Ellie; I'll comb your hair.”
I thought about protesting for a moment, then realised this would mean he'd be touching me. I sat down. He was gentle, so gentle. He stroked through my hair with his fingers, then started combing. He made this low, soft purring noise as he did so. The sound vibrated through me and I purred as well. It was both soothing and arousing at the same time and over too soon. We went to the bedroom. John took off his socks, shoes and outer clothes. I did the same. I almost tried not to look at those muscles, the long legs and arms, the hair revealed on his lower torso as his tee shirt untucked. John opened a drawer near the bed and offered me one of his spare tee shirts. Plain white, ironed, folded. I saw several more, exactly identical, underneath it. I put the tee over my undies and climbed into bed.
John turned to me, “C'm'ere, Ellie.”
Well, if this was going to be my only chance... I scooted over and gingerly laid my head on his shoulder. He smelled warm, spicy and all man. Everything I'd ever wanted.
“Okay?”
He grunted contentedly, “Yes. 'Night, Ellie.”
Then he turned out the lights. I fell asleep not so long after that.
I woke up with a start sometime later. John was sitting up in bed, bolt upright.
“Hey, John; are you okay?”
He was staring into the distance fixedly and muttering something. I gently put my arms around him. He turned to me and buried his face in the join between my shoulder and neck.
“Ellie...”
“C'mon; lie down, John.”
Luckily he moved with me and began trembling in my arms. It wasn't until I felt dampness on my shoulder that I realised he was crying. I folded him closer and began to make soothing noises, even though I was in tears myself. I gently stroked my hands up and down his back.
“I'm right here, sweetheart, my love, it's okay. Let it all out.”
Eventually, he stopped and went back to sleep. I turned over and fell asleep again myself.
I woke in the morning to the smell of fresh coffee. John wasn't in the bed, but I could hear him moving about downstairs. I decided to say nothing about the mutual crying session last night unless John brought it up. I was considering getting out of bed when I heard John coming up the stairs. He was humming happily. He came into the room, carrying a tray full of coffee, fruit and cereal in bowls.
I smiled, “Wonderful!”
He smiled, really smiled, “Morning, Ellie!”
John leaned over and gently kissed my cheek as he handed me my breakfast. I took my share and put them on the table by the bed.
“John?”
He put his own breakfast down and cupped my chin, “Just when I thought everything was falling apart, you give me the only, the best reason I need to continue.”
“Huh?”
He gently brushed my lips with his, “I love you too, sweetheart.”
He'd heard. I blushed and gasped, giving him the perfect opportunity to deepen the kiss. We fell back onto the bed, still kissing. Suddenly breakfast went out of my mind. My borrowed tee shirt went flying as John and I continued to indulge in wonderful, thrilling foreplay. My heart soared with joy. There was only one tiny cloud on my horizon. I pulled away slightly as John's warm hands were attempting to relieve me of my bra.
“John?”
He stopped for a moment, “Don't worry, darling Ellie. Kathleen was the love of my life. You are...in so many more ways than she ever was. That's the other reason I can't go to her. You've eclipsed her completely.”
“Oh!”
I pulled him back down to me and our next kiss was deep and passionate. We made love slowly, thoroughly, taking our time. By the time we lay gasping and blissful in the afterglow, the coffee had long since gone cold, but we didn't care. John stroked my hair as I ran my fingers slowly up and down his chest.
He made a deeply contented noise, “I'll adjust to anything with you by my side, darling.”
“I wish there was some way to get you re-instated, my love.”
“Well, technically speaking, with me being a civilian, our relationship is permitted at the moment.”
I sighed contentedly, “There is that. One day at a time.”
He pulled me closer, “Yes, sweet Ellie. One day at a time.”
Casey/Ellie AU in which Ellie gets the Intersect and Devon isn't around.
Set during 'Chuck vs the Tic Tac' and after-wards
PG plus; some sexual content
So, three years ago I accidentally read an e-mail meant for Chuck and got the Intersect in my head. Soon after, Sarah and John came to look after me and help me. I've known almost from the start that both Sarah and John have secrets. Some of them they can probably never tell me. I understand that. But I know John; he's as reliable as rock. Possibly more so!
In the last three years, John's been there at my back and by my side; protecting, cajoling, unbending and deadly towards the bad guys. John supported me early on when Devon couldn't cope with the new encyclopedia of the Intersect in my brain and me having to go off at odd times of day and night. When Devon left, John held me, wiped my tears and provided moral support. Slowly, almost imperceptively, I've fallen in love with him. I've noticed every time when there have been flashes of tenderness in his eyes or in the tone of his voice.
I know a sexual or romantic relationship between asset and handler is - well, not exactly forbidden - but it is frowned upon. We aren't supposed to cross the line between business and pleasure. Emotions can cloud the issue, that's for sure. I know that from being a doctor. So I've said nothing.
Then came the day recently when Casey went on the run. It looked like he was working for the Ring. I refused to believe it. Unless he was a double agent. It was inconceivable that he could betray everything he stood for. So Sarah and I went after him. By that time, I'd found out that John wasn't his real name.
As he said to me, “I'm not John Casey.”
I protested, “I don't care what your name really is; I know you.”
His eyes flashed briefly. That meant something to him.
Then he told us about Kathleen, his fiancee twenty odd years ago, “She was the love of my life.”
I bit back a gasp of pain. The last crumb of hope I held that something - anything - romantic or sexual could happen between John and me died. I felt the pain deep within. It was as though my heart had broken into a million tiny painful pieces. I had to pretend to fiddle with my gear. This was worse - far worse - than when Devon left me.
Then I met Kathleen, albeit briefly. She was somewhere about the same age as John, slim, lovely and dark-haired. Maybe that was it; maybe John found me at least attractive because I reminded him a little of her. Or he just preferred brunettes, who knows. I was just about dealing with the revelation of lovely Kathleen when her nineteen year old daughter ran in. Her daughter called Alex. John was stunned, shocked. I could see it in his eyes. He had no idea until she appeared that he was a father. I tried to talk to him, but he'd shut down, disassociated.
We went back to the Castle. General Beckman was there. She took action against John's treason. I tried to protest, but John shook his head, his jaw set firm.
“No, Ellie. I did this.”
“But you were trying to save the life of your fiancee,” I turned to Bekman, “Doesn't that count for anything?”
Beckman looked at me, “Eleanor Bartowski; I understand Colonel Casey's motives, believe me. But that does not negate his actions, the actions of a serving agent and ex-serviceman. For that, I must do this.”
She was right, as far as military law was concerned. But it hurt so deeply to see John standing so stiffly, holding in his pain and all the other emotions by a hair. His demotion to plain civilian hurt deeply; almost broke him. I could tell that just by looking at him. Then came the forced moved out of his condo. The team even knocked over his beloved bonsai. It was positively heartbreaking. I managed to salvage a number of items whilst the team were working. Morgan and Chuck helped me; getting as much as possible over to John's new smaller place before the salvage team got their hands on it.
Later, John was sitting in what passed for his new lving room. He barely noticed as we smuggled furniture and other things into the place. I'd repotted the bonsai and it sat on his tiny new coffee table. John seemed to be staring at it.
I put my hand on his shoulder, “John; you could go to Kathleen and your daughter now.”
“Huh,” he rose to his feet, “No going back, Ellie.”
“John, I lost my Dad for several years. I would have given almost anything to have him back for one day. Surely your daughter deserves a chance to know her father?”
His jaw tensed, “No. It would place them at danger, especially with The Ring being around.”
He was right and I knew it.
I nodded and turned away. Suddenly I felt tears coming. John folded me in his arms.
“Hey, 's'okay. I'll be fine.”
I wasn't only crying for him, but I didn't say anything.
“It's been a tough day today.”
John grunted softly, “I know.”
He tucked me under his chin. I suddenly found myself trembling and shaking with delayed shock.
He grunted softly and tenderly, “Hey. You shouldn't be alone tonight.”
I wiped my face with my hand, “I should be saying that to you!”
He offered me his handkercheif, “Well, maybe so. After all the upheaval today, maybe we both need a friend. Thank-you for rescuing my bed and other things. Tonight, we will share it.”
I looked up at him in surprise, “John?”
He held my chin, “For human company, nothing more. And just tonight, okay?”
Well, I'd dreamed often enough about sharing his bed. And one night was better than never.
I nodded, “Yes.”
So, we shared a drink of whisky and went upstairs. John loaned me a spare toothbrush and then found a comb for my hair.
“Sit down, Ellie; I'll comb your hair.”
I thought about protesting for a moment, then realised this would mean he'd be touching me. I sat down. He was gentle, so gentle. He stroked through my hair with his fingers, then started combing. He made this low, soft purring noise as he did so. The sound vibrated through me and I purred as well. It was both soothing and arousing at the same time and over too soon. We went to the bedroom. John took off his socks, shoes and outer clothes. I did the same. I almost tried not to look at those muscles, the long legs and arms, the hair revealed on his lower torso as his tee shirt untucked. John opened a drawer near the bed and offered me one of his spare tee shirts. Plain white, ironed, folded. I saw several more, exactly identical, underneath it. I put the tee over my undies and climbed into bed.
John turned to me, “C'm'ere, Ellie.”
Well, if this was going to be my only chance... I scooted over and gingerly laid my head on his shoulder. He smelled warm, spicy and all man. Everything I'd ever wanted.
“Okay?”
He grunted contentedly, “Yes. 'Night, Ellie.”
Then he turned out the lights. I fell asleep not so long after that.
I woke up with a start sometime later. John was sitting up in bed, bolt upright.
“Hey, John; are you okay?”
He was staring into the distance fixedly and muttering something. I gently put my arms around him. He turned to me and buried his face in the join between my shoulder and neck.
“Ellie...”
“C'mon; lie down, John.”
Luckily he moved with me and began trembling in my arms. It wasn't until I felt dampness on my shoulder that I realised he was crying. I folded him closer and began to make soothing noises, even though I was in tears myself. I gently stroked my hands up and down his back.
“I'm right here, sweetheart, my love, it's okay. Let it all out.”
Eventually, he stopped and went back to sleep. I turned over and fell asleep again myself.
I woke in the morning to the smell of fresh coffee. John wasn't in the bed, but I could hear him moving about downstairs. I decided to say nothing about the mutual crying session last night unless John brought it up. I was considering getting out of bed when I heard John coming up the stairs. He was humming happily. He came into the room, carrying a tray full of coffee, fruit and cereal in bowls.
I smiled, “Wonderful!”
He smiled, really smiled, “Morning, Ellie!”
John leaned over and gently kissed my cheek as he handed me my breakfast. I took my share and put them on the table by the bed.
“John?”
He put his own breakfast down and cupped my chin, “Just when I thought everything was falling apart, you give me the only, the best reason I need to continue.”
“Huh?”
He gently brushed my lips with his, “I love you too, sweetheart.”
He'd heard. I blushed and gasped, giving him the perfect opportunity to deepen the kiss. We fell back onto the bed, still kissing. Suddenly breakfast went out of my mind. My borrowed tee shirt went flying as John and I continued to indulge in wonderful, thrilling foreplay. My heart soared with joy. There was only one tiny cloud on my horizon. I pulled away slightly as John's warm hands were attempting to relieve me of my bra.
“John?”
He stopped for a moment, “Don't worry, darling Ellie. Kathleen was the love of my life. You are...in so many more ways than she ever was. That's the other reason I can't go to her. You've eclipsed her completely.”
“Oh!”
I pulled him back down to me and our next kiss was deep and passionate. We made love slowly, thoroughly, taking our time. By the time we lay gasping and blissful in the afterglow, the coffee had long since gone cold, but we didn't care. John stroked my hair as I ran my fingers slowly up and down his chest.
He made a deeply contented noise, “I'll adjust to anything with you by my side, darling.”
“I wish there was some way to get you re-instated, my love.”
“Well, technically speaking, with me being a civilian, our relationship is permitted at the moment.”
I sighed contentedly, “There is that. One day at a time.”
He pulled me closer, “Yes, sweet Ellie. One day at a time.”