(no subject)
i don't know much of anything anymore. i thought i had an idea about the type of person i was, then i started growing up and decided i wanted to leave her behind. but as much as i try, i can't. and i'm still this same jealous insecure resentful selfish thirteen year old i never wanted to be. someone tell me what i'm supposed to do. do i change what i don't like about myself? or do i accept what i don't like and just go with it anyway? it's not even me with other people. it's me with myself, constantly trying to prove myself to myself and almost always letting me down. there are so many people that i hate right now and it has nothing to do with hate at all really. it has to do with the amount of love i can't seem to let go of.