what if i promise to hold on long enough to suffer

[xeatmyheartout_]

i hate your fake promises. your plans seem to change from hour to hour. maybe less. for some reason i'm always the last pick.
i hate this feeling of being left out.
i hate how i'm overcome with sadness, anger, and jealousy at even the slightest mention of your name.
i hate how you can't look at me anymore.
i hate how i feel like you don't want me around anymore.
i hate how you left.
i hate how you ditched me in class and now don't even acknowldge my existance.
i hate how i can't get you out of my head.
i hate how i am constantly jealous of everyone and everything.
i hate how failure is enedible.
i hate how you seemed to wipe away our past.
i hate how you act like nothing ever happened.