On our own.
So its Halloween. And I'm sat at home.
Dad and sue took me out for a meal tonight, but the food wasn't too good.
I just sat and ate and reeled off the usual conversation.
I don't mean to sound ungrateful, its always wonderful to see them, and it was completely out of the blue which got me out of the flat for the third night in a row.
But life feels like a traffic jam. The light is red, and I'm ten miles away from it.
Routine is not a bad thing, but I'm still finding myself very tired all the time.
Like I never really get enough time to recharge properly.
I've made a real effort to socialize this week,
but I also feel like people are no more interested than if they were sat with a cardboard cut out of me.
I'm a dot on the map and the rest of the world is much bigger and moving around without me.
There's no flavor to anything I do at the moment.
Its a matter of struggling to get through each day, instead of enjoying each day and taking it as it comes. Which is something I need to tackle because its going to bring me down and I shouldn't allow myself to feel like that.
I'm also very lonely right now. I'm getting more and more nervous about Matt moving out in two weeks.
And the fireworks have started, if they go on for a month I will scream.
Dad and sue took me out for a meal tonight, but the food wasn't too good.
I just sat and ate and reeled off the usual conversation.
I don't mean to sound ungrateful, its always wonderful to see them, and it was completely out of the blue which got me out of the flat for the third night in a row.
But life feels like a traffic jam. The light is red, and I'm ten miles away from it.
Routine is not a bad thing, but I'm still finding myself very tired all the time.
Like I never really get enough time to recharge properly.
I've made a real effort to socialize this week,
but I also feel like people are no more interested than if they were sat with a cardboard cut out of me.
I'm a dot on the map and the rest of the world is much bigger and moving around without me.
There's no flavor to anything I do at the moment.
Its a matter of struggling to get through each day, instead of enjoying each day and taking it as it comes. Which is something I need to tackle because its going to bring me down and I shouldn't allow myself to feel like that.
I'm also very lonely right now. I'm getting more and more nervous about Matt moving out in two weeks.
And the fireworks have started, if they go on for a month I will scream.