*bouncy*

[xdamagedgirlx]

So Ben and Sara and various other people I've been occupying my time talking to are all offline now so I am bored beyond bored. I really *should* go and do school work. No, I really should. Why the hell am I so fucking unmotivated? Because it's boring? Maybe. I mean I don't have any work due right now, apart from an essay in Philosophy on Monday but there's no way I could focus on that tonight. I have too much shit going through my mind. And even though the work has died down a little, I'm still stressed as hell! But things are going okay. I'm on good terms with all the people that really matter in my life so that is good. Uvic lowered their average to 75% so I'm like more than guaranteed to get in, since my average right now is higher than that, and even though the semester is only half over I'm sure I'll do okay if I just keep working really hard. I may be lazy 90% of the time but when I have work due I really do buckle down and work my ass off. I'm hoping to go visit my Sara in Victoria during her Spring Break but she hasn't gotten back to me on that yet so we'll see. I hope I can though, I love her to pieces. In other news, I got a job tutoring! SIX hours per week at $10 hour, which is $60 a week, which isn't much but it is sure better than nothing since I don't really have time for an actual job right now. It's my mom's friend's daughter who is in grade 10, for English and Math. And some other people at my mom's work got my name and number because they have kids they are thinking about letting me tutor! So I'm quite happy about that. I'll be starting tutoring Farron after Spring Break. School ends in April (strike is over now thank God) and then I hope to work full time from May until mid-July, and then from mid-July to mid-August volunteer as a camp counsellor at Pioneer Pacific which Ali's old youth leader Steph runs, so that would be awesome, I'm meeting with her on Friday. It would also help me get into the Youth Care Worker program at Uvic, which I plan to enter in fall of 2006.  So things are going relatively well. I'm still very lonely, depressed, and still cutting, but I'm starting to be able to (at least somewhat)  look towards the future and put Panorama/Curtis/high school/Scott and all that other hurtful and bad shit where it belongs... in the past.

*Takes a dare and posts a picture of me today with no make-up on and my glasses on (yuck)*


*HIDES*