(no subject)
holidays arn't as much fun as they used to be. my friends all have full time jobs and look down on me still at school. sarah before you start i havn't been abel to tell them what for, cause i hardly ever see them.
the have money, nad i have no shifts, starting to look for a new job and if neil asks me to work i'll tell him to shove his 4-hour-shift-that-doesn't-mean-shit up him fucken ass and get his two other FULL TIME dishies to do the fucken function.
there are two moments in my life that stick out in my memory, they arnt happy either, the first was the grad ceremony in year 12, when everyone went up to collect their dealys one by one, i watched all my friends go up with cheers from our drama head friends, my loud friends and so on. "sarah dewar" WWWWOOOO YYEEAAA D HUZZAH, "guy hampton" WWOOOO YYEEAA GUY WOOO ROCK, "royston barker" RRAAAA YYEEAAH ROYSTON ROCK WOOO YEAH, "will redfern" .....*crickets*, one person, scotty, my bro, who gave a slight woo. none of my loud friends, no drama heads who genrally like being loud, not my then girlfriend.
the other memory, was my 18th birthday, a bunch of my frends and i went clubbing, hit it up, got a bit smashed, little did they know it was by b'day. they thought it was my friends one. i get my boys the coolest shit on the planet for their b'days, we're all into cars ok? so for goof's 18th, i got him a bourbon flask with his custom numberplate engraved on it, for his 19th i got him a ford v8 supercar replica remote control car, a ute version for my other mate, for cristmas as well as their prezzies i created a custom rendition of the twelve days of christmas in a car theme, they were different for each person. i got $20 and a card bearing a happy birthday this year, and went to someone elses party who i dont know and ended up walking off and chillin with their dog.
its always up to me to keep everyone happy, it's the always smiling and caring will, but when i turn to them i get nothing, no congrats for doin good shit, no are you ok's, no don't worry about it's, and they always get the shits when i cant go out with them cause i have no money, goof got angry with me because i couldn't work cause i had school. its always up to me to call them, i'm sick of being the instigator, the other day i was bored and lonley so i sent about 12 msg's t people asking what they're up to, how many reply's did i get? none.
i constantly feel unloved, my mum thinks my b'day is the 18th.
i try to stay tough in the comany of my friends, but i can't
im just not
the have money, nad i have no shifts, starting to look for a new job and if neil asks me to work i'll tell him to shove his 4-hour-shift-that-doesn't-mean-shit up him fucken ass and get his two other FULL TIME dishies to do the fucken function.
there are two moments in my life that stick out in my memory, they arnt happy either, the first was the grad ceremony in year 12, when everyone went up to collect their dealys one by one, i watched all my friends go up with cheers from our drama head friends, my loud friends and so on. "sarah dewar" WWWWOOOO YYEEAAA D HUZZAH, "guy hampton" WWOOOO YYEEAA GUY WOOO ROCK, "royston barker" RRAAAA YYEEAAH ROYSTON ROCK WOOO YEAH, "will redfern" .....*crickets*, one person, scotty, my bro, who gave a slight woo. none of my loud friends, no drama heads who genrally like being loud, not my then girlfriend.
the other memory, was my 18th birthday, a bunch of my frends and i went clubbing, hit it up, got a bit smashed, little did they know it was by b'day. they thought it was my friends one. i get my boys the coolest shit on the planet for their b'days, we're all into cars ok? so for goof's 18th, i got him a bourbon flask with his custom numberplate engraved on it, for his 19th i got him a ford v8 supercar replica remote control car, a ute version for my other mate, for cristmas as well as their prezzies i created a custom rendition of the twelve days of christmas in a car theme, they were different for each person. i got $20 and a card bearing a happy birthday this year, and went to someone elses party who i dont know and ended up walking off and chillin with their dog.
its always up to me to keep everyone happy, it's the always smiling and caring will, but when i turn to them i get nothing, no congrats for doin good shit, no are you ok's, no don't worry about it's, and they always get the shits when i cant go out with them cause i have no money, goof got angry with me because i couldn't work cause i had school. its always up to me to call them, i'm sick of being the instigator, the other day i was bored and lonley so i sent about 12 msg's t people asking what they're up to, how many reply's did i get? none.
i constantly feel unloved, my mum thinks my b'day is the 18th.
i try to stay tough in the comany of my friends, but i can't
im just not