I've seen sinking ships go down with more grace than you ..
Hmmm So Im sitting here bored bc everyone is out and Im hoping writing here will entertain me for a little. Its Friday and I didnt go to school for one reason or another and I dont remember much about this week. Had basically my third Grease rehearsal and saw some of the show. Its cute and everyones doing really well with it, I love surrounding myself with such talented people. I just wish that I was more apart of it all bc Im so out of inside jokes and just all of the fun. 42nd Street was AMAZING like one of the greatest times of my life and I got so close with people I wasnt close with before and I just loved it all, and this year its just the opposite, I feel more disstant from everyone if anything. Idk Im sure people are sick of hearing me and Jessie complain about it haha so Ill stop.
IM so stresssed for this weekend. I have so much to do and Im the least organized person ever and dont know how to manage myself at all. Saturday I have to work which is fine. But Sunday Im gonna have to get up and get ready before tutoring at 10 (usually I dont get ready and just stay in my PJs haha, Im sure Vanessa likes it.) Then SAT 10-12, right from there I have to go to the Purim Carnival at the temple, basically a huge event. And being President Im in charge of basically planning alllll of it. Now, just about a week away. Stressed doesnt really describe it. Anyway after I dea; with that nightmare I have to leave early (and Im already coming late) and go to Grease rehearsal until 4, or just skip it to stay at SWFTY. I cant fit it all innn I need more hours in the day seriously.
A total topic switch bc I dont feel like worrying about that shit anymore WAIT A FUCKING MINUTE .... PURIM CARNIVAL IS NEZT WEEKEND AND GREASE IS THIS WEEKEND! OMG YES!
Alright, now instead of just earasing that whole paragraph bc now it doesnt make sense Ill leave it for amusement purposes. Anyway back to the topic switch .. I feel like Im losing a friend and I cant tell if its for the better or not. Bascially I already lost the friend and maybe its better for my mental health but it makes me really sad, so I guess that cancells out the better mental health. This makes no sense but even though I havent been close with this person that recently I felt like we would always have this bond that couldnt be broken and even when we dont talk we could tak and it could be like weve been BFFs the whole time. I mean this has happened but now I feel like this person hates me, actually Im pretty sure they do and its wierd. At this point if I keep trying to hold it together I think Ill push them farther, and if I dont do anything theyll push themselves farther on their own so I feel helpless in it all. I feel like there is nothing I can do to help the situation, when all I want to do is fix it hardcore. Who fucking knows.
What should I be when I grow up? I feel lost bc I have NO idea, like I cant narrow it down at all. I think ya'll should leave comments telling me what Id be good at. Yup, thats what I think
Alright well I gotta go do so much shit (SAT hw, Purim flyers, Order Purim novelties, Write camp essays ...) Soo yes
Always,
Mindy