Lastnight was the best day i ever had in like a long time*
There's alot to write today. hmm yesterday went to school :).. it was ok!.. and then ashley wanted to go to the movies with me, so i said ok, and then after school came home called mother but she was working late so then i called stepfather norman, and he said he would bring us.. i was a bit surprised about that one.. well then sat around the house for a while.. drank some wine, got a buzz.. mmm.. miss that. then watched my used dvd.. ashley got here around 6, then norman got home a couple minutes later.. and then we headed to the movies in his pick up truck which was an interesting ride might i add.. i had to sit on the floor and lay in ashleys lap! haha that was fucking great! im not saying i didnt like it;).. much funnn! haha.. anyways we got there we hung around saw puggsley right away.. and then i saw josh and fucking ran after him!!!!!!! i missed him so much, ok well ill leave it at that for now, cause im going to write EVERYTHING in here about him! just cause i love him and miss him so read on fuckers!.. ok so we hungout and i wasnt with ashley much she was talking to danielle and kayla alot, and she was with dan the whole time to i figured i'd give her, her space for once.. then she decided to come and talk to me and then trina happen to come up to me and ask me if i wanted to go on a walk alone with her so we could chat about things.. so we did.. we walked behind the cvs building talk the whole time.. i love how me and her can talk now.. she just has alot of things to work on with her feelings which im trying to help but it gets fustrating at time.. but i still try. well then josh came running after us.. and then we all talked about things.. and then josh told me that ashley thought i was mad at her.. but i wasnt at all.. so we walked back.. chatted with ash and dan for a bit.. and then i walked around with josh and got to hold hands with my little josh all night... man i miss that! so yea then trina got upset tryed to help her.. but didnt work she kept walking way.. and then well i stopped trying for a while then.. i got soo pissed off cause i was sitting out side cvs and then the cops came to tell us to move, so i was like "omg are your serious i just wanna sit down for one fucking second goddamn!" and then the cop was like, what did you say and im like NOTHING! and then hes like come here.. im like "w/e what do you want now?!" and then hes like what is your name and im like "sara" and hes like blah blah we cant have people sitting in front of the store, they called us and told us to come remove you guys away from the store.. and im like "im sorry i swear officer, but i just wanna site down without getting yelled at so i can talk to my friend alone for one second" and hes like why are you here and im like "because i wanted to hangout and im waiting for someone to come get me" and hes like well why are you here still and then i said " i just told you, im waiting for someone so therefor i have to stay and wait.." and then i just walked away.. ahhh it pissed me off soo bad.. oh and some kids were saying shit about trina and that right there is what got me pissed in the first place and then the cop had to make it worse.. I HATE PEOPLE! i swear i was gonna kick the shit out of them.. ashley even told me to go over there and do it so did dan and hes friends with them.. but i couldnt to many cops and im 17 i can get arrested.. i dont need that, i just yelled at themm.. thennnn there was these really annoying girls and they kept screaming so i screamed at them and said "OMG AHHHH SHUT THE FUCK YOU ARE SOO ANNOYING!!!" haha ashley laughed.. she likes it when i yell at annoying girls :).. mm mm. hmm here are some really good parts im gonna skip a line i think..
well when josh and i, actually got to talk.. it was soo awesome that is something i will never forget.. i told him how i wish things could be the same again.. and how it all sucks now and how when we talk online things dont feel right.. and i told him he doesnt understand how much i care because he thought that i cared for someone else more.. which i dont.. and then he said "sara i will never forget you, you are the first person that i would NEVER forget.. you mean so much to me, more than anyone in my life!" hmm. well i told him that he knows how much me means to me.. and such.. but then we got yelled at so yea we had to leave.. then we just walked away and chilled.. i came over to the waiting area were ash, dan, trina, and others were, i was soo pissed i had threw my soda and it exploded on me and josh well our legs and such.. and then dan saw and he got mad at me.. and now i feel bad, cause i guess he was really mad, (he was mad cause he bought it for me).. :( sorry dan i love you!.. well then like after 5 mins after that i was standing hugging josh and then a fucking fat ass cop came up to us and was like finish you hugging in te waiting area WHICH I WAS STAND RIGHT FUCKING NEAR IT! so i jumped in the box thing and i was like happy now you fucking fat ass mother fucker!.. and then he walkeda way.. and well i talked to danielle and kayla because danielle came up to me and was like was wrong.. if you tell me ill tell you whats wrong with me and then i told her.. and then she told me.. ooof does she talk fast.. but at least i know her and im usta it and i dont get confused anymore :).. then after that went over to ash.. oh right around here adam showed up with janette tooo :). and then me, dan:-P, ash :):), trina :), vinny :), josh<3.. and someother little ones, oh and cobain :) hehe i love that little kid.. and we chilled near radioshack area.. and well i walked around while.. adam, janette, ash, dan, and someother kids sat there.. and i held hands with josh and talked to him and we hugged alot.. and well heres some other info.. when i was hugging him he said "i just wanna take you home and lock you up.. so i can take you everywhere with me"..."i miss you so much, i dont wanna go, i dont wanna let go of you, i dont wanna leave you!!".. awwwwwwwwww josh i fucking love youuu so much kiddd!! hmm then trina walked off, so i told him he should go talk to her.. and he said he didnt want me to leave him so i said i would walk him there and then she came to us, then i said bye to josh cause i had to cause i didnt know if he was comming bakc or not.. and then i sat down and then i started cryingg caause i feel like that kid gets ripped away from me all the time.. and i cant take it anymore.. adam came and hugged me for awhile, then i saw josh and trina comming back.. then josh came and stood intfront of me.. and then i looked up at him and he was like "omg sara what is wrong!?!"..i told him nothing.. then trinas mom showed up to get them.. and then i hugged him some more.. and then i said to him.."i feel like you get ripped away from me all the time, and i cant handle it, sometimes it hurts so much to talk about." then he said "well dont cry( :-( ), cause its not going to make anything better." and then i hugged him for a long time, theni said goobye josh i love you. and the he said i love you.. and he wouldnt let go of my hand it took him a while.. :(, it was soo awesome but yet so sad at the same time.. hmm then adam went to get the car and i sat alone while ash and dan were talking n such.. and then ashley said "saraaaaa, can you pleasee comee hereeeee!?!" ::in a sad cute voice:: (awwww) and then i came to her and she hugged me, and then she said whats wrong but i said nothing.. and then she said dont lie to me.. and then i said will talk later.. man do i love that girl with all of me, it felt so good for her to just stand there and hug me and ask me what was wrong when i was sad.<3333 hmm after that we headed to contempo.. and we saw DAVEEEE!! yay! and he gave me and ash a group hug.. mmm hes soo cute i love him!! <3.. we saw nicole erika and russ too!!! hmm and then we went in cause ross and adam were gonna sing, and then me, nicole, and janette. went in to sit and watch but we all ened up singing esp. without the mic hehe! it was so much fun thooo<3333! then joe came!!! <3 and ash and janette ran over to him i sat there :-/ like usual.. then we all just headed out side to sit and chat.. joe made fun of me as usual.. hmm well kinda he got no sleep thats why. :(.. oh well it was fucking halarious.. i dont really remember what he said.. cause he was looking at me so much when he would talk.. mm he has sucd pretty eyeees*<3 i love that man!<3 ok well then we head home after that said our goodbye to nicole.. awww im gonna miss herrrrr and erikaa so muchhhh!! <333 and well erika and russ had left before we sang, thank god for them. hahahahahaah! got to adams house and me and ash went and slept in the trailer, it was cold again.. oh well.. we kept eachother warm.. :) and we had tons of blankets again.. we talk for a while too.. and then we just kinda fell alseep <3.. haha ashley woke me up this morning.. aww she's soo cute<3.. got up, sat downstairs with ashley, ross, and adam, then they got up.. and we went to work.. which was funnnnN! worked till like 130? and then came here.. and now im talking to people n listening to music.. mmm<3.. adams gets out of work at 8ish and then hes comming to get me and then were going to go the music store.. and then contempo and were gonna make ross come down there.. and thennnn probably back to adams house :).. sleeping the trailer alone tonight. goodbye.
xBLeEdThEs0rRoWx: i miss you already
xBLeEdThEs0rRoWx: i was soo sad
xBLeEdThEs0rRoWx: i had trouble sleeping last night
...<3 i love you kid. <3
xBLeEdThEs0rRoWx: i miss you
..yepp i love this boy forever! <3
..Pictures <3 :):):)..
<^Jake, Me and Josh, the summer before they moved. <3 i was going to add the new pictures the ones we took lastnight, but he hasnt put them on his computer yet and he cant becauseeee he need to order another disc for his camera software.. but when he send them i'll be sure to put them in here right away!<3
josh i miss thoses days soo much kid.. i miss you already and i saw you lastnight.. ill never forget you!! i love you so muchh, i cant even explain to you how much i do. <3 (the used for life*) good old dayssssss