13

[xbonzi]

a sudden rush of emotion jsut filled me and i'm almost into tears. i miss greg so much. gregory ryan landau i miss you and i love you more than you could ever know.  i finally opened up to 1 person how much i cared about him and it was the most suprising of people to tell but i felt liek she would understand me.  i really miss him i want him in my dreams everynight if i cant have him in my arms.  there are so man sides of him i never got to see but so manyt hat i did. thinking of him and our memories makes my heart sink, it feels so heavy and i feel so empty.  he changed my life and i still can not bring myself back to his grave.  i'm scared i wont leave i cant face it not again. i wish i belived in tattoos but that isnt enough for him. i wish i could have something of his like his hat or his black shirt. i really miss him.
i'm in a better mood than the other day when i posted. even tho it may not sound like it.