Sting

[xblack_lodgex]

I was in Scott's room, looking through his cds for something new to listen to,
and at the bottom of his cd rack I saw a couple of blank/burnt/mix cds that he had put together.
I looked to see what songs were on them and what I saw just sucked the breath out of me.
He wrote down all the songs that were on the cds he burnt,
and the writing was so scribbled and jumbled it looked like the hand writing of a young child
judging by the songs on the mix cd I could tell it was made towards the end of his life
and it just broke my heart
I could literally see the struggle in his hand writing
He was so strong and put up with the decomposition of his life for so long
it's just amazing the inner strength he had.

I don't understand this life, I don't understand what we are, or what our purpose is
I feel like we are all just lost animals,
wishing there was a shepard out there to lead us to a safe peaceful existence,
but in my years on earth, I've yet to see any proof of such a thing.

I'd give my life to have Scott back for one day.
I miss you and love you to the point where it's so far beyond words and prayers to you it just leaves me shaking my head because I still can't get it through my brain that you are gone,
god what happened to life?