(no subject)
i hate skinny people.
i think ive brain washed myself. every person i see i cant help but be jealous or think somthing in my mind bad about my body.
but the funny thing is i just need to loose like 10..15 pounds.
but its so hard, i exercise everyday but i only loose a pound here or there and then i just gain it back in a bad weekend.
i actualy dont like ppl seeing this about me but i gota write it somewhere.
in school i feel out of place bc of it alot, and ppl compare..you know?
even shosh sliped up on the way home and was like, "dad you said annie was the heavier one.." and then he told her to be quiet.
he definatly didnt mean it but it does hurt. but mostly the one that hurts me.. is me now.
my zaide always tells me that i better watch the donkey, and even that doesnt hurt anymore.
i dont think ppl realize that calling ppl fat doesnt help them lose weight. health class always ends up comign back to being fat lately, i mean i know im really not fat.. just a plump, but still its offensive what ppl can say in health class about it.
and i just wnat to say shut up you have nothing to worry about.
i dont want my life to revovle aroudn the battle between me and my body and confidence.
i dont even eat bad foods and i do maintain my weight but i want to lose and be happy about it or just not have to Think about it! its such a burden..
maybe this is just making it worse. so ill stop now.
today in kollel no one came except me and abbie and he gave us the honest truth about ourselves and israel so ill post on that later..
<3 annie
i think ive brain washed myself. every person i see i cant help but be jealous or think somthing in my mind bad about my body.
but the funny thing is i just need to loose like 10..15 pounds.
but its so hard, i exercise everyday but i only loose a pound here or there and then i just gain it back in a bad weekend.
i actualy dont like ppl seeing this about me but i gota write it somewhere.
in school i feel out of place bc of it alot, and ppl compare..you know?
even shosh sliped up on the way home and was like, "dad you said annie was the heavier one.." and then he told her to be quiet.
he definatly didnt mean it but it does hurt. but mostly the one that hurts me.. is me now.
my zaide always tells me that i better watch the donkey, and even that doesnt hurt anymore.
i dont think ppl realize that calling ppl fat doesnt help them lose weight. health class always ends up comign back to being fat lately, i mean i know im really not fat.. just a plump, but still its offensive what ppl can say in health class about it.
and i just wnat to say shut up you have nothing to worry about.
i dont want my life to revovle aroudn the battle between me and my body and confidence.
i dont even eat bad foods and i do maintain my weight but i want to lose and be happy about it or just not have to Think about it! its such a burden..
maybe this is just making it worse. so ill stop now.
today in kollel no one came except me and abbie and he gave us the honest truth about ourselves and israel so ill post on that later..
<3 annie