::you're not here with me::
I'm not really sure what to write. I just had the sudden urge to get some things off of my chest for once. I seem to be more confused than ever...I'm not really sure why, or what caused this, but I seriously feel like I'm going to break down, even though there's no one there to catch me. I just hate getting myself into situations, knowing there's a slight chance I will come out of it hurt and lost. There's nothing I can really do or say to make this situation any better. All I can do is sit here, alone in my empty room, hoping everything will somehow go the way I want it to, since nothing ever seems to end the way I hope they would. I guess I'm just afraid, mostly. Afraid of getting hurt yet again. So I distance myself when I realize that it's still not perfect, and I'm still alone. I believe that things happen for a reason, and maybe the reason for this issue is what I'm anticipating for (hopefully). But who really knows. One person does, and it's allin their hands. I'm just here to take his hand and show him that I will never leave his side as long as he wants me there. But through all of this, people are getting hurt. I feel awful because it is my fault. But I'm hoping they will understand that I can't help how I feel...I'm only human and I feel emotions and desires just like anyone else. This is all just too much, and this has to be my longest entry, which is ridiculous!!!! But anyways, I will sit here and hope for the best. There's only so much I can do, but this is something I can do nothing about, sadly. So main points of this long, drawn out entry....
1. I'm scared of getting hurt
2. Confused, confused, confused
3. Letting it all work out no its own
4. Keeping distance is hard
5. Hurting people isn't a fun thing
6. There's only so much a person can do before it's too late
7. People need to understand they don't have dibs on me and I can make my own decisions
sorry to all you who actually read this and have NO IDEA what the hell I'm talking about. I don't blame you, because I'm lost as well
::this time I'll ber nervous::
1. I'm scared of getting hurt
2. Confused, confused, confused
3. Letting it all work out no its own
4. Keeping distance is hard
5. Hurting people isn't a fun thing
6. There's only so much a person can do before it's too late
7. People need to understand they don't have dibs on me and I can make my own decisions
sorry to all you who actually read this and have NO IDEA what the hell I'm talking about. I don't blame you, because I'm lost as well
::this time I'll ber nervous::