Dec 22, 2005 18:38
So my stepdad is dying and probably won't live to see next christmas. I have mixed feelings about it. Of course I feel horrible that he's going to die but other circumstances come to play. My mom is so pissed at me cause I'm not acting like her by breaking down. She doesn't understand that I don't do well with emotion. The only time I even cry is if something is so bad that its basically piercing through me. I wish I could act more caring but I just can't. It's not like I don't care at all about him. It's just I can't show emotion for it. I think my mom thinks I will go back to cutting cause of my disassociation. I will never go back to that. I like to think that I have climbed out of that hole and I can't go back down. Only up.
Anyways on lighter news, Ray and I are back together for those that know us that haven't figured that out yet. We only broke up for a week. He's in New York for the entire 11 day break. Kinda sucks. Oh well. Anyways that's basically all that's new. I hate Ms peagler if that's anything new. Oh and my fav teacher ever is having to retire which sucks major.
I hope everyone has a great holiday. Love you all.