You Are My Life
the nurse pulled on the gloves for him hurriedly as he finished scrubbing in.
tick tock.
the flurry in the operating theatre grew as one group of nurses checked the vitals of the patient lying prone.
the 24 years of his life summed up in the faint green blips on the monitor next to him.
beep. beep.
"Doc, he's under. 12 hours starts now."
he nodded as stood by waiting, reviewing the stats one more time.
then the doors crashed open and another group of nurses came rushing in, pulling another trolley behind them.
tick tock.
he looked down at his new patient, distinct handsome features which was half concealed by the oxygen mask that covered half of his face.
there's no turning back, he had said.
i don't want to, the other had replied.
he patted the shoulder of the man as he checked the drip that would pull him into a deep sleep.
"All ready, Yunho?" his voice was soft, comforting.
"Yes."
"I just want you to know.. it's a very brave thing you're doing."
The man nodded, attempting a small smile.
"Okay, count backwards from 10 to 1."
---
10.
Big doe eyes.
9.
Favourite bookshop.
8.
Too many unneeded books bought.
7.
Dates.
6.
Love.
5.
Sickness.
4.
Failing organ.
3.
Too far down on the transplant list.
2.
98% match.
1.
---
Changmin wakes up, eyes bleary.
Beep. Beep.
He's in hospital, a slight ache in his side.
His mother notices and rushes over, clutching his hand, tears of joy falling.
"Oh, you're awake! Thank goodness, oh. Changmin. It was a success."
A success?
---
He pulls on his drip stand as he wheels himself gingerly to the window of the recovery room.
A mask on his face, for his immunity is still low, body adapting to the new organ in him.
He can't enter the room either.
His eyes well up at the sight of the sedated figure on the bed in front of him.
"You silly, silly man. Such an idiot."
---
Yunho groans as he is socked in the side in a playful tussle for the last cookie.
"Baby!" he whines, falling to the ground in mock agony. "It hurts!"
Changmin stares for a second and then rushes to Yunho's side.
"Shit, I'm sorry, are you ok.."
He's pulled into a kiss, rest of his words muffled against soft lips.
"Yunho! You fucking scared me..I thought I hurt you, the side where... " growls Changmin, pushing the older man away half in relief and half in anger.
"I'm okay, baby," soothes Yunho, as he grabs his boyfriend in a tight hug.
"I thought I hurt you.." repeats Changmin, eyes downcast.
"You didn't, I'm sorry. It was a stupid joke." apologises Yunho, kissing below Changmin's ear.
---
"I'll never forgive you for doing that, you know? You could have died." whispers Changmin against the window, tears falling as the memory of his mother telling him what Yunho had decided to do the morning of the day before, when doctors had given Changmin a 20-hour window to get a transplant -or die-.
---
"I'll never forgive myself if I could save Changmin and I didn't." whispers Yunho, his voice loud in the silent doctor's office.
---
"I owe you for life." promises Changmin as he holds onto Yunho, overcome with emotion at finally being able to touch the other as he sat up in his hospital bed.
"Like you literally owe me for your life." jokes Yunho in return.
They stare at each other for seconds, words unspoken, tension in the air.
"I love you." they both say, at the same time.
--
No regrets, even if I die, thinks Yunho as he succumbs to sleep, eyes closing against the glare of the operating theatre's lamps, a mismatched pair of eyes and a bright smile accompanying his dreams.
tick tock.
the flurry in the operating theatre grew as one group of nurses checked the vitals of the patient lying prone.
the 24 years of his life summed up in the faint green blips on the monitor next to him.
beep. beep.
"Doc, he's under. 12 hours starts now."
he nodded as stood by waiting, reviewing the stats one more time.
then the doors crashed open and another group of nurses came rushing in, pulling another trolley behind them.
tick tock.
he looked down at his new patient, distinct handsome features which was half concealed by the oxygen mask that covered half of his face.
there's no turning back, he had said.
i don't want to, the other had replied.
he patted the shoulder of the man as he checked the drip that would pull him into a deep sleep.
"All ready, Yunho?" his voice was soft, comforting.
"Yes."
"I just want you to know.. it's a very brave thing you're doing."
The man nodded, attempting a small smile.
"Okay, count backwards from 10 to 1."
---
10.
Big doe eyes.
9.
Favourite bookshop.
8.
Too many unneeded books bought.
7.
Dates.
6.
Love.
5.
Sickness.
4.
Failing organ.
3.
Too far down on the transplant list.
2.
98% match.
1.
---
Changmin wakes up, eyes bleary.
Beep. Beep.
He's in hospital, a slight ache in his side.
His mother notices and rushes over, clutching his hand, tears of joy falling.
"Oh, you're awake! Thank goodness, oh. Changmin. It was a success."
A success?
---
He pulls on his drip stand as he wheels himself gingerly to the window of the recovery room.
A mask on his face, for his immunity is still low, body adapting to the new organ in him.
He can't enter the room either.
His eyes well up at the sight of the sedated figure on the bed in front of him.
"You silly, silly man. Such an idiot."
---
Yunho groans as he is socked in the side in a playful tussle for the last cookie.
"Baby!" he whines, falling to the ground in mock agony. "It hurts!"
Changmin stares for a second and then rushes to Yunho's side.
"Shit, I'm sorry, are you ok.."
He's pulled into a kiss, rest of his words muffled against soft lips.
"Yunho! You fucking scared me..I thought I hurt you, the side where... " growls Changmin, pushing the older man away half in relief and half in anger.
"I'm okay, baby," soothes Yunho, as he grabs his boyfriend in a tight hug.
"I thought I hurt you.." repeats Changmin, eyes downcast.
"You didn't, I'm sorry. It was a stupid joke." apologises Yunho, kissing below Changmin's ear.
---
"I'll never forgive you for doing that, you know? You could have died." whispers Changmin against the window, tears falling as the memory of his mother telling him what Yunho had decided to do the morning of the day before, when doctors had given Changmin a 20-hour window to get a transplant -or die-.
---
"I'll never forgive myself if I could save Changmin and I didn't." whispers Yunho, his voice loud in the silent doctor's office.
---
"I owe you for life." promises Changmin as he holds onto Yunho, overcome with emotion at finally being able to touch the other as he sat up in his hospital bed.
"Like you literally owe me for your life." jokes Yunho in return.
They stare at each other for seconds, words unspoken, tension in the air.
"I love you." they both say, at the same time.
--
No regrets, even if I die, thinks Yunho as he succumbs to sleep, eyes closing against the glare of the operating theatre's lamps, a mismatched pair of eyes and a bright smile accompanying his dreams.