WTF do you think you're doing?!?!?
So, I'm walking in downtown Chicago yesterday. This is a normal occurrence for me because I work in downtown Chicago.
Normally, there are homeless people standing around trying to sell newspapers, magazines, books, small children - anything unguarded they can find laying about randomly (note: I'm joking about the small children).
However, as the disgustingly cold winter is making it harder and harder to sit around and panhandle, the homeless are becoming more and more aggressive. They're taking to following you for a few steps and increasing their voice and if you continue to ignore them, they curse at you loudly and call you horrible names, such as this gem tossed out at me, "You nigga dick puzsy fucka! Hai canchew hep ah homess!?".
That honestly just made me laugh as I kept on walking. I do sometimes give the homeless some spare change. But, only to the ones that are in obvious need of it and almost never to homeless men; in Chicago there's too many places to go and get work. I ride the train with a lady who helps find jobs for the homeless and one of her gripes is the lack of people to fill the jobs. Another gripe of course being that she gets these people jobs and they quit showing up when they're expected to work. Well, I usually only give money to the homeless women. I absolutely refuse to give any money to the 'disable vets' because: 1 - if you're truly disabled, you get money from the government. 2 - if you're truly a veteran, there's dozens of programs to get you on your feet. So, in my opinion, if you're a 'disabled vet' and out pan-handling, then it's by choice - taking the easy route instead of working for it like the rest of us. Wouldn't it would be nice if we could all just sit around and get money? I work my ass off for my money and I'll be damned before I give it to someone who isn't willing to work for their own money.
So, this brings us around to yesterday. I was walking along and there was the usual assortment of homeless people. The Disabled Veteran guy who periodically stands up to push his wheelchair to a better spot, the Troll-Woman who smoked so much her voice is little more than a guttural growl who tosses out curses (I think), the Polite Guy who is just really polite and doesn't beg, just sits and talk and I give change to now and again...and a new one, who shall be called, Creepy Shoe-Shine Ambush guy. You can tell where this is going right...?
So, CSSA guy jumps in front of me and squirts this horrible sticky looking whitish-pearl concoction from a water bottle on my shoes - as I'm walking. I stop (my first mistake) and stare in horror at what looks to be a water bottle full of...hrm, how to put it, ah, Genetic Material and I look at the guy with shock and disgust. He gets down on his knees and starts wiping my shoes off saying things about how he's like my brother only black and he don't mean no harm, he just wants to get the salt off my shoes (fer you AZ folks, they salt the roads and sidewalks because of the snow so everything is salt stained). That was my biggest mistake - I just stood there in dumbfounded horror and let him wipe my shoes off, because really, it was nasty looking and I didn't want to touch it myself. I really should have just walked off, or kicked him in the head or something. He's about finished with the first shoe and he starts in about how he's homeless (duh) and cold (duh - Chicago) and then he throws in, "I be shining shoes for money, only eight dolla's per shoe, tip is up to you". I interrupt his soliloquy and say, "You spayed that nasty shit on my and you expect me to pay you? What the fuck do you think you're doing?" and he repeats that he's homeless and cold and blah blah blah and I'm just like, dude, don't touch me. I start to pull away to leave and he grabs my other foot and starts rubbing the nasty looking white stuff all over it and keeps saying how he's cold and such and finally, in desperation to get away and not have him follow me I give him the only money in my wallet which is a $20 and I start to walk away.
You'd think I would stop there, but when he completely lost interest in me having given him money, and squirts some ladies shoes and she just screams and runs. Not to lose out, CSSA guy runs after her saying "come back and let me clean it off! I don't mean you no harm, I'm like your brother only black!"
So, now I've got salt stained, Unknown Substance stained suede shoes. They're my favorite pair and it pisses me off that I didn't just avoid him or run when I had the chance. I'll try to wash them tonight, but...sigh. I hate this place.
Normally, there are homeless people standing around trying to sell newspapers, magazines, books, small children - anything unguarded they can find laying about randomly (note: I'm joking about the small children).
However, as the disgustingly cold winter is making it harder and harder to sit around and panhandle, the homeless are becoming more and more aggressive. They're taking to following you for a few steps and increasing their voice and if you continue to ignore them, they curse at you loudly and call you horrible names, such as this gem tossed out at me, "You nigga dick puzsy fucka! Hai canchew hep ah homess!?".
That honestly just made me laugh as I kept on walking. I do sometimes give the homeless some spare change. But, only to the ones that are in obvious need of it and almost never to homeless men; in Chicago there's too many places to go and get work. I ride the train with a lady who helps find jobs for the homeless and one of her gripes is the lack of people to fill the jobs. Another gripe of course being that she gets these people jobs and they quit showing up when they're expected to work. Well, I usually only give money to the homeless women. I absolutely refuse to give any money to the 'disable vets' because: 1 - if you're truly disabled, you get money from the government. 2 - if you're truly a veteran, there's dozens of programs to get you on your feet. So, in my opinion, if you're a 'disabled vet' and out pan-handling, then it's by choice - taking the easy route instead of working for it like the rest of us. Wouldn't it would be nice if we could all just sit around and get money? I work my ass off for my money and I'll be damned before I give it to someone who isn't willing to work for their own money.
So, this brings us around to yesterday. I was walking along and there was the usual assortment of homeless people. The Disabled Veteran guy who periodically stands up to push his wheelchair to a better spot, the Troll-Woman who smoked so much her voice is little more than a guttural growl who tosses out curses (I think), the Polite Guy who is just really polite and doesn't beg, just sits and talk and I give change to now and again...and a new one, who shall be called, Creepy Shoe-Shine Ambush guy. You can tell where this is going right...?
So, CSSA guy jumps in front of me and squirts this horrible sticky looking whitish-pearl concoction from a water bottle on my shoes - as I'm walking. I stop (my first mistake) and stare in horror at what looks to be a water bottle full of...hrm, how to put it, ah, Genetic Material and I look at the guy with shock and disgust. He gets down on his knees and starts wiping my shoes off saying things about how he's like my brother only black and he don't mean no harm, he just wants to get the salt off my shoes (fer you AZ folks, they salt the roads and sidewalks because of the snow so everything is salt stained). That was my biggest mistake - I just stood there in dumbfounded horror and let him wipe my shoes off, because really, it was nasty looking and I didn't want to touch it myself. I really should have just walked off, or kicked him in the head or something. He's about finished with the first shoe and he starts in about how he's homeless (duh) and cold (duh - Chicago) and then he throws in, "I be shining shoes for money, only eight dolla's per shoe, tip is up to you". I interrupt his soliloquy and say, "You spayed that nasty shit on my and you expect me to pay you? What the fuck do you think you're doing?" and he repeats that he's homeless and cold and blah blah blah and I'm just like, dude, don't touch me. I start to pull away to leave and he grabs my other foot and starts rubbing the nasty looking white stuff all over it and keeps saying how he's cold and such and finally, in desperation to get away and not have him follow me I give him the only money in my wallet which is a $20 and I start to walk away.
You'd think I would stop there, but when he completely lost interest in me having given him money, and squirts some ladies shoes and she just screams and runs. Not to lose out, CSSA guy runs after her saying "come back and let me clean it off! I don't mean you no harm, I'm like your brother only black!"
So, now I've got salt stained, Unknown Substance stained suede shoes. They're my favorite pair and it pisses me off that I didn't just avoid him or run when I had the chance. I'll try to wash them tonight, but...sigh. I hate this place.