[text]

[fireburned]

ok i gotta move outta town and i gotta do it soon, and i need to find a american city that fits the following

Comments

[thelivingend]

not canada, i have dibs

[fireburned]

canada wont let me go there anyway, i got the vampires.

you cant have dibs on the whole fucking country anyhow.

[thelivingend]

can so. i licked it.

[fireburned]

i am ok with sloppy seconds.

[thelivingend]

i said licked, not fucked. don't be gross

[fireburned]

well i have to assume your inability to share comes from somewhere. sharing is caring. didnt you get taught that in grade school?

[thelivingend]

it comes from me having called dibs

this is my territory, i licked canada and then i peed on it. all along the border. and my pee smells pretty bad, so beware

[fireburned]

look im trying really hard not to make a golden showers joke here.

i thought canadians were friendly. :(

[thelivingend]

YOU THOUGHT WRONG. actually i am from pennsylvania originally, but i came here for the poutine.

also stop being grosssss

[fireburned]

i have a reputation to uphold ill have you know. it is a 'harvestman is a gross asshole who only cares about sex' reputation. you dont know how hard it is to maintain.

look i got brody with me. hes cute like a puppy. how can you resist a puppy.

[campjesus]

but i'm half-canadian :(
am i allowed :(