Get right down to the bottom of the barrel, and then float back on top.
I keep on laughing to keep from crying
I keep on dreaming to keep from dying
I keep on trying
Ain’t gonna stop
Get right down to the bottom of the barrel
And then you float back on top I was feeling pretty blue there for a while. I really was. I was being held down by all these stresses that I was placing on myself. No one else was holding such expectations of me, it was just me self-defeating. So I had a long talk with my parents about some things. I told them that I was trying hard to be the daughter they wanted me to be but I can't always be perfect. Basically they both told me what I had already known: they were proud of me and what I was doing and they weren't the ones expecting all these things out of me, that was my doing. I had known that all along but I think I needed to hear it from them. Then that night I came to terms with the fact that I can't hold all these things that really weren't my responsibilities on my shoulders all the time. The stress from what was unnecessary was impeding on the things in my life that I really needed to be responsible for. So, I cleared house. Now I can focus on being a successful student, a good girlfriend, a better friend, and being happy!
Jim came and visited this past weekend and it was exactly what I needed after the emotionally draining week. It was wonderful. We acted like little kids and play-fought for hours. We ate pizza and junk food galore. We layed around in bed for an entire day. We went out so Jim could experience OU party life. We stayed up way too late talking about us and our past. He even left me a cute little scavenger hunt in my room when he left and I was in class. This weekend was utterly perfect. It made me realize how strong our relationship is and exactly how in love we are with eachother. I am seriously lucky to have someone who cares as deeply for me as I do for them. I hope everyone is lucky enough to find what I have.
I've developed this horrible habit of sleeping through both of my alarms and then sleeping until about noon. This wouldn't be so bad except that evertime I do this I miss two of my five classes. Yeah, not good.
I started taking pictures again. Photography has always been a release for me because everyday I notice things in ways that other people don't. Either they don't care or they don't see it in the same way I do. Last year I discovered how beautiful OU's campus really is, and I want to capture that so that I can remember why I love it here. So, there will be a lot of photos showing up in here. I'm sort of scared to do this because I know other people won't see them as I see them, but Jim told me to post them, so I will. So, love it or hate it, here's some of how I see OU:
XOJess