its alive...
i forgot about livejournal for a long time.. im bringing it back from the dead though.. i suggest that you only read my entries if you truely care about me .. they may not always be the happiest on earth and some people may get annoyed by my complaining about life.. if you fall into that catagory dont even bother telling me.. honestly your opinion dosent isnt worth shit.. but anyways considering a major set of events im thinking it would be a little abnormal if i was entirely myself anymore.. dont get me wrong i can be happy every once and a while but not like i usedto...
i can feel it though im different from how i was this time last year.. i guess its kindof hard to explane but just nothing is the same anymore.. maybe its not really so different in a way though.. ive been through something like this but entirely different before.. when i tell some people that they see it as 'ive done it once and i should be able to pull through it just fine again' which i guess seems reasonable in a way.. so i just dont know why its like the opposite to me... but w.e
I guess I'll just say this flat out. I miss him like hell. I miss us even more. Good and bad together.. cuz even after a fight i could still go to sleep knowing i was safe with him and thats what mattered to me... heh if only i could sleep anymore now. im just sick of being allone i guess.