Day 1
Quick update tonight (will write more tomorrow!)
Things are going very well :0D. I can already start to see changes, especially in my posture and strength. I stood up in the kitchen for like 15 minutes and didn't feel the urge to lean on the work surface and I've talked so much (and with such gusto) that my throat hurts! It really is going to work for me and I'm so excited :0D :0D!
I spent 4 hours going through all the jigsaw pieces that make up the lightning process and it was much easier than I thought it was going to be. Then I learnt the actual process which is incredibly simple. It's hard to believe that something so simple holds the cure to something that's been plauging me for so long.
The cause of all the ME symptoms is an over active amygdala, which produces an over flow of adrenaline, which causes all the ME symptoms. This over active amygdala was triggered by an illness or an over whelming stressful event (or a bit of both as was my case). This then causes the symptoms, which are all so familiar. We then get into a mindset where we worry about symptoms (which is entirely legitimate), look for them to be there are constantly 'body scanning', this then triggers the adrenaline etc etc. It's all a bit more complicated than that, but that is sort of the genral gist of it and it makes a LOT of sense. I wasn't aware till today just how much I think about the 'How will I's?', 'Can I's', 'I feel's', 'this hurt's' etc. It's really quite amazing when you step back and really look at it. There's also a lot about changing the language you use. Because when you say I have, I am, I feel...it's putting you in a passive state with very little control. Changing it to I'm doing, or I do, makes it active...it makes it changable if that makes sense. Sorry if this sounds completely non-sensical, it took four hours for me to really understand it all. But I promise you it really does make a lot of sense!
The lightning process itself involves cutting off the adrenaline loop by stopping the thoughts that trigger it. So everytime I think 'oh I feel nauseous' or 'oh my legs hurt' I say "STOP" and make a no (or stop) action with my hands to reinforce it, make a mental choice to go eiother to 'the pit' (ME) or to the life that I want and love (no brainer) and say to myself (be my own coach) "well done, your on the right track, you can do anything, I will be there for you every step of the way and I love you". It sounds a little crazy but it's not. I've had to do the process A LOT, I'm sitting here right now doing it everytime my mind drifts onto anything ME related. I'm not just supressing symptoms or 'brain washing' myself, I'm actually cutting off the fuel for the adrenaline loop and stopping the symptoms from manefesting. Put it this way I feel energetic (though nicely tired, NOT ME tired) after a long day and I have no fear that it will result in anything bad, because I can cut off the adrenaline before it causes my symptoms. Apprently cutting off the adrenaline loop stops 70% of ME symptoms instantly, because adrenaline disapates quickly from the body. I can well believe it, because I feel it. It's not just wishful thinking or positivity :0D
My muscles are all twitchy because as my therapist put it, the workers that left to fight the war (the fight or flight brought on by adrenaline) are returning to my muscles...it has something to do with lactic acid build up causing the muscle fibres to simply not be able to work because the body switches to anerobic respiration when in fight or flight mode...this causes the muscle aches and pains and the post exertional fatigue (which is caused by neurotransmitters not functioning as they should) etc. I don't think I've explained that all properly (got the science right), but thats sort of the gist of it (my high school biology is buried in a dark recess of my brain!).
Also I had to look at my posture, because you send messages to your brain via your body language, so you may stopping the thoughts, but your body slouching over says I feel tired etc. My therapist also gave me another technique to do along side the STOP. We all (those of us who are doing or did ME, I'm using the active terminology rather than the passive one) know the thoughts that creep into our mind when we go somewhere/walk. Well every time I'm walking I picture myself as I used to be or as I will be in the future, striding along...full of energy and smiles. Also we used a strong memory of my past, riding along the beach at bamburgh castle with my sister. The shear happiness and energy and vitality I felt remembering it made me cry (also good because it lowers stress). I'm using that a lot too right now.
One thing I found really fascinating was when she had me look for all the red objects in the room, close my eyes and remember them. Then she had me (still keeping my eyes closed) remember everything green and yellow and black. It was soooo hard to think of the green, yellow and black objects, because I'd been looking for the red things. The same thing applies to ME, when you're looking for all the symptoms, that is all that you will find.
Am really looking forward to waking up tomorrow and going to day two! I'm so happy!!!!!!!!
Thanks to everyone that commented! Will try to answers questions if there are any (though don't ask me to clarify the science behind it because I don't really have a good enough gist of it all to not make a complete hash of it trying to explain it...as far as I'm concerned it's all gooooooood)I'll keep you updated tomorrow! looking forward to walking down the big hill to the river (will be taking camera!).
:0D *hugs*
Things are going very well :0D. I can already start to see changes, especially in my posture and strength. I stood up in the kitchen for like 15 minutes and didn't feel the urge to lean on the work surface and I've talked so much (and with such gusto) that my throat hurts! It really is going to work for me and I'm so excited :0D :0D!
I spent 4 hours going through all the jigsaw pieces that make up the lightning process and it was much easier than I thought it was going to be. Then I learnt the actual process which is incredibly simple. It's hard to believe that something so simple holds the cure to something that's been plauging me for so long.
The cause of all the ME symptoms is an over active amygdala, which produces an over flow of adrenaline, which causes all the ME symptoms. This over active amygdala was triggered by an illness or an over whelming stressful event (or a bit of both as was my case). This then causes the symptoms, which are all so familiar. We then get into a mindset where we worry about symptoms (which is entirely legitimate), look for them to be there are constantly 'body scanning', this then triggers the adrenaline etc etc. It's all a bit more complicated than that, but that is sort of the genral gist of it and it makes a LOT of sense. I wasn't aware till today just how much I think about the 'How will I's?', 'Can I's', 'I feel's', 'this hurt's' etc. It's really quite amazing when you step back and really look at it. There's also a lot about changing the language you use. Because when you say I have, I am, I feel...it's putting you in a passive state with very little control. Changing it to I'm doing, or I do, makes it active...it makes it changable if that makes sense. Sorry if this sounds completely non-sensical, it took four hours for me to really understand it all. But I promise you it really does make a lot of sense!
The lightning process itself involves cutting off the adrenaline loop by stopping the thoughts that trigger it. So everytime I think 'oh I feel nauseous' or 'oh my legs hurt' I say "STOP" and make a no (or stop) action with my hands to reinforce it, make a mental choice to go eiother to 'the pit' (ME) or to the life that I want and love (no brainer) and say to myself (be my own coach) "well done, your on the right track, you can do anything, I will be there for you every step of the way and I love you". It sounds a little crazy but it's not. I've had to do the process A LOT, I'm sitting here right now doing it everytime my mind drifts onto anything ME related. I'm not just supressing symptoms or 'brain washing' myself, I'm actually cutting off the fuel for the adrenaline loop and stopping the symptoms from manefesting. Put it this way I feel energetic (though nicely tired, NOT ME tired) after a long day and I have no fear that it will result in anything bad, because I can cut off the adrenaline before it causes my symptoms. Apprently cutting off the adrenaline loop stops 70% of ME symptoms instantly, because adrenaline disapates quickly from the body. I can well believe it, because I feel it. It's not just wishful thinking or positivity :0D
My muscles are all twitchy because as my therapist put it, the workers that left to fight the war (the fight or flight brought on by adrenaline) are returning to my muscles...it has something to do with lactic acid build up causing the muscle fibres to simply not be able to work because the body switches to anerobic respiration when in fight or flight mode...this causes the muscle aches and pains and the post exertional fatigue (which is caused by neurotransmitters not functioning as they should) etc. I don't think I've explained that all properly (got the science right), but thats sort of the gist of it (my high school biology is buried in a dark recess of my brain!).
Also I had to look at my posture, because you send messages to your brain via your body language, so you may stopping the thoughts, but your body slouching over says I feel tired etc. My therapist also gave me another technique to do along side the STOP. We all (those of us who are doing or did ME, I'm using the active terminology rather than the passive one) know the thoughts that creep into our mind when we go somewhere/walk. Well every time I'm walking I picture myself as I used to be or as I will be in the future, striding along...full of energy and smiles. Also we used a strong memory of my past, riding along the beach at bamburgh castle with my sister. The shear happiness and energy and vitality I felt remembering it made me cry (also good because it lowers stress). I'm using that a lot too right now.
One thing I found really fascinating was when she had me look for all the red objects in the room, close my eyes and remember them. Then she had me (still keeping my eyes closed) remember everything green and yellow and black. It was soooo hard to think of the green, yellow and black objects, because I'd been looking for the red things. The same thing applies to ME, when you're looking for all the symptoms, that is all that you will find.
Am really looking forward to waking up tomorrow and going to day two! I'm so happy!!!!!!!!
Thanks to everyone that commented! Will try to answers questions if there are any (though don't ask me to clarify the science behind it because I don't really have a good enough gist of it all to not make a complete hash of it trying to explain it...as far as I'm concerned it's all gooooooood)I'll keep you updated tomorrow! looking forward to walking down the big hill to the river (will be taking camera!).
:0D *hugs*