(no subject)
*name not used because it's not my right...
Ok so this is going to be a religious entry, so if you're not into that kind of thing, then I'm sorry, this probably won't interest you.
We were at church tonight for a fireside, and it was the best fireside I've ever been to. I don't even know what is with me today, it's just like I've been an open book, waiting for someone to read me, and everything that was said tonight felt like it was for me and me alone.
There was this one guy, he was a guest speaker, and he gave us all a pen and a piece of paper and asked us to close our eyes. So I did, which I usually don't, because I feel like a dork, but I did tonight. He asked us to picture our life as over, and you were in Heaven, and Jesus was there, standing right in front of you. He asked us to write down what we want to hear from Him, and how he was standing and everything. And it just came to me, that I needed to think of this from *her point of view. So I did, and He was there, with open arms, telling me that no matter how many mistakes I make, and no matter how many times I screw things up big time, He will be there, with open arms, waiting for me. Because He loves me. He loves me. I find that the most amazing thing ever. That He can still love me after all the times I blow it. I just wish I knew that kind of love. It's crazy. Like, I read the scriptures, and I know it's true. But every once in a while, I just get this feeling, and I know that there's no turning back. I can't deny this. It's the truest thing I've ever known.
Leisha came over after the fireside, and we read scriptures, and talked, and I guess just had our own little spiritul time. We were talking about forgivness, and it's like the best gift I've ever been given. It's hard to like, take this all in at once, and I've known this all forever, but it's like I'm just now comprehending it all.
I've just learned in the past couple months that everyone makes mistakes. I mean yeah in the back of my mind, I knew it, but I didn't see it. I saw *her as everything. Things like that may happen to anyone, but that's not who she is. She's my everything, and I love her, and I know that no matter how many times, or how big a blunder, he still loves her. His love is that unconditional that He can forgive us for the same sin, a million times over. I would get sick to death of that, but He just keeps forgiving. I'm so grateful for that.
We listen to MercyMe all the time, and they have that one song "I Can Only Imagine" and that is like, how I feel completely. Me and Leish were talking about it, and I said "picture him as the 'star of all stars', and he wants to meet me." I get to meet him. And have that be a witness to me. I can't wait. I used to be terrified of death and dying, but now, I know that yeah, it might hurt a little, but more than anything I know that he's going to be waiting for me when I get there telling me that he missed me, and is proud of me, and glad I made it home whole. I just wish I could express all this in a way that made perfect sense, but man, I just...I'm in awe.
Ok so this is going to be a religious entry, so if you're not into that kind of thing, then I'm sorry, this probably won't interest you.
We were at church tonight for a fireside, and it was the best fireside I've ever been to. I don't even know what is with me today, it's just like I've been an open book, waiting for someone to read me, and everything that was said tonight felt like it was for me and me alone.
There was this one guy, he was a guest speaker, and he gave us all a pen and a piece of paper and asked us to close our eyes. So I did, which I usually don't, because I feel like a dork, but I did tonight. He asked us to picture our life as over, and you were in Heaven, and Jesus was there, standing right in front of you. He asked us to write down what we want to hear from Him, and how he was standing and everything. And it just came to me, that I needed to think of this from *her point of view. So I did, and He was there, with open arms, telling me that no matter how many mistakes I make, and no matter how many times I screw things up big time, He will be there, with open arms, waiting for me. Because He loves me. He loves me. I find that the most amazing thing ever. That He can still love me after all the times I blow it. I just wish I knew that kind of love. It's crazy. Like, I read the scriptures, and I know it's true. But every once in a while, I just get this feeling, and I know that there's no turning back. I can't deny this. It's the truest thing I've ever known.
Leisha came over after the fireside, and we read scriptures, and talked, and I guess just had our own little spiritul time. We were talking about forgivness, and it's like the best gift I've ever been given. It's hard to like, take this all in at once, and I've known this all forever, but it's like I'm just now comprehending it all.
I've just learned in the past couple months that everyone makes mistakes. I mean yeah in the back of my mind, I knew it, but I didn't see it. I saw *her as everything. Things like that may happen to anyone, but that's not who she is. She's my everything, and I love her, and I know that no matter how many times, or how big a blunder, he still loves her. His love is that unconditional that He can forgive us for the same sin, a million times over. I would get sick to death of that, but He just keeps forgiving. I'm so grateful for that.
We listen to MercyMe all the time, and they have that one song "I Can Only Imagine" and that is like, how I feel completely. Me and Leish were talking about it, and I said "picture him as the 'star of all stars', and he wants to meet me." I get to meet him. And have that be a witness to me. I can't wait. I used to be terrified of death and dying, but now, I know that yeah, it might hurt a little, but more than anything I know that he's going to be waiting for me when I get there telling me that he missed me, and is proud of me, and glad I made it home whole. I just wish I could express all this in a way that made perfect sense, but man, I just...I'm in awe.