feeling fat
im about to be really fucking emo right now... don't hold it against me.
I feel fat. and gross. Im trying to stick to weight watchers... but its sooo hard. Im also trying to get away from thinking negitively about how I look. I want to lose weight the "healthy," but im starting to slowly get back into my old habits... I ate an italian at Corey's last night and I wanted to go throw it up soooo bad, but didn't. Why is it that I'm CRAVING to do this again? It's gross and dangerous... but sometimes I don't care. Sometime I don't care if I die of a heart attack at age 18.
I don't understand why Im so depressed lately. Me and mom are getting along really well... even me and dad... well... he's been trying to stay in youch with me and talk with me. I try my hardest. Me and Kels are cool again... I have a really awesome boyfriend and im 6 weeks away from graduating.
I just dont feel like myself anymore. I feel like a big blob and I just want to shrink and disappear. I get so self conscience when people look at me... I always feel like they're judging me... ahhhh i need to quit bitching and get a life.
maybe ill get one for xmas.
I feel fat. and gross. Im trying to stick to weight watchers... but its sooo hard. Im also trying to get away from thinking negitively about how I look. I want to lose weight the "healthy," but im starting to slowly get back into my old habits... I ate an italian at Corey's last night and I wanted to go throw it up soooo bad, but didn't. Why is it that I'm CRAVING to do this again? It's gross and dangerous... but sometimes I don't care. Sometime I don't care if I die of a heart attack at age 18.
I don't understand why Im so depressed lately. Me and mom are getting along really well... even me and dad... well... he's been trying to stay in youch with me and talk with me. I try my hardest. Me and Kels are cool again... I have a really awesome boyfriend and im 6 weeks away from graduating.
I just dont feel like myself anymore. I feel like a big blob and I just want to shrink and disappear. I get so self conscience when people look at me... I always feel like they're judging me... ahhhh i need to quit bitching and get a life.
maybe ill get one for xmas.