we all begin with good intent...
I tried to let you go
I wish I could turn back time and show you just how I feel
I needed you to know if it takes my whole damned life
I'll make this up to you..
I'm kind of like the waves
that roll their whole life towards somewhere, crashing it on the shore.
that's blown in by the wind, that carries the clouds
to hide my wish on a fallen star...
a different kind of pain, is someone there to hold you?
is someone there to take you away from me?
this weather is fucking gay. if it would make up it's mind and act like winter, I could probably be snowboarding. and I'm not exactly sure why I haven't updated my journal lately, but now that I have a free moment..
I've been reallly stressed the past week. mostly about gymnastics. but I can't say that I don't love it. we had three competitions so far, and won them all. yesteray, we had an invitational at home against six other teams and won first place. I was so happy. and I won the handstand contest against all the sophomores. =)
I can't really say it's been boring since the last time I updated. we had our choir concert on the 4th, and it was packed in there. oh yeah, and by the way that day was also my half birthday, as well as Jill's seventeenth birthday. one of these days the gymnastics team went to Joe Dumar's and we did the high ropes and this trampoline thing were we did double-backs. it was awesome. I hung out with Charles a few times this week, which is always fun. I love him. :o) on friday night, Pat, Jenny, Joe, the rest of Jenny's family and I went to Fraser Idol, but I couldn't stay for the whole thing because I had to set up the gym for the competition the next day. I don't know, sweet. or not that sweet. last night Jenny spent the night, we had some laughs as usual, watching funny movies, sitting in my kitchen for like two hours just making a shitload of food. <3 today we went to the mall and hungout, then went to Pats for a little. We all ended up going to Mcdonalds and going bowling after that. we had some fun. we are all so stupid, and I love it. =D
but recently I've been having some mixed feelings.. good and bad. I end up crying myself to sleep at night, thinking about things. my thoughts are breaking me. maybe I'm a little too hard on myself sometimes, but I wonder if the choices I made are going to effect my entire life, or just a small portion of it- as in now. somehow I feel like I messed up. I miss alot of things. I always manage to screw things up somehow. I need to clear my mind... but I don't know how. I get angry at the things people say or do very easily. recently I haven't been that happy. maybe things will change. [breathes]. I can't really explain.
exams coming up. one more thing I get to be stressed about. but coming to think about it, exams didn't really bother me that much last year. so maybe they won't this year, either. maybe it's because we get to get out of school early. heh.
it's like a tidal wave that rose to take the stars;
a hurricane that wrapped around my heart.
if I could find a way, I'd make a brand new start..
I can't believe it was the calm that killed the storm.
I wish I could turn back time and show you just how I feel
I needed you to know if it takes my whole damned life
I'll make this up to you..
I'm kind of like the waves
that roll their whole life towards somewhere, crashing it on the shore.
that's blown in by the wind, that carries the clouds
to hide my wish on a fallen star...
a different kind of pain, is someone there to hold you?
is someone there to take you away from me?
this weather is fucking gay. if it would make up it's mind and act like winter, I could probably be snowboarding. and I'm not exactly sure why I haven't updated my journal lately, but now that I have a free moment..
I've been reallly stressed the past week. mostly about gymnastics. but I can't say that I don't love it. we had three competitions so far, and won them all. yesteray, we had an invitational at home against six other teams and won first place. I was so happy. and I won the handstand contest against all the sophomores. =)
I can't really say it's been boring since the last time I updated. we had our choir concert on the 4th, and it was packed in there. oh yeah, and by the way that day was also my half birthday, as well as Jill's seventeenth birthday. one of these days the gymnastics team went to Joe Dumar's and we did the high ropes and this trampoline thing were we did double-backs. it was awesome. I hung out with Charles a few times this week, which is always fun. I love him. :o) on friday night, Pat, Jenny, Joe, the rest of Jenny's family and I went to Fraser Idol, but I couldn't stay for the whole thing because I had to set up the gym for the competition the next day. I don't know, sweet. or not that sweet. last night Jenny spent the night, we had some laughs as usual, watching funny movies, sitting in my kitchen for like two hours just making a shitload of food. <3 today we went to the mall and hungout, then went to Pats for a little. We all ended up going to Mcdonalds and going bowling after that. we had some fun. we are all so stupid, and I love it. =D
but recently I've been having some mixed feelings.. good and bad. I end up crying myself to sleep at night, thinking about things. my thoughts are breaking me. maybe I'm a little too hard on myself sometimes, but I wonder if the choices I made are going to effect my entire life, or just a small portion of it- as in now. somehow I feel like I messed up. I miss alot of things. I always manage to screw things up somehow. I need to clear my mind... but I don't know how. I get angry at the things people say or do very easily. recently I haven't been that happy. maybe things will change. [breathes]. I can't really explain.
exams coming up. one more thing I get to be stressed about. but coming to think about it, exams didn't really bother me that much last year. so maybe they won't this year, either. maybe it's because we get to get out of school early. heh.
it's like a tidal wave that rose to take the stars;
a hurricane that wrapped around my heart.
if I could find a way, I'd make a brand new start..
I can't believe it was the calm that killed the storm.