Hard
The hard part about living above average hard life is that it saps into your sensitivity and softness.
There is no guarantee that not meeting you might have resulted in me meeting someone else who would reciprocate to the depth of my feeling. Though, I do think I'd have a higher chance to land a better fit than my ex.
Would I still end up where I am today? Divorced with kids. Very likely. I am not an easy person to deal with, keep up with, and be around. But would I, at least, have an ex with more money. Yes, highly likely. This thinking ends me in reflecting that having financially stable ex would be less stress on me. I wouldn't be as hard as I feel I am today.
Softness takes time. What do you do when you have no time because you are chronically late for everything and your plate is overflowing on a good day, and it is a full on tornedo a bad day, and you have more of bad days than good days?
Yeah... softness....